This is a preview episode for our recap of the second and third episodes of The Bachelor Australia's first season! To find the full episode, head to our page on Patreon and subscribe to Bachelor of Hearts: Extra Credit.

Bachelor of Hearts

[PREVIEW] Ancient Kisstory: Bigger & Bigger Poop Thrills (Bachelor AU S1 E2-3)

BoH is back, baby! With this episode, we begin the dive into our second Ancient Kisstory miniseries, this time looking at the first ever Australian season of The Bachelor, from all the way back in 2013. We glean what we can about the origins of the local version, including the casting of 30-year-old Sydney-based chiropractor Tim Robards as the first Australian lead, and the ways that production tried to imbue this season with a touch of local flair. Plus - tons of context about the state of the country in 2013, a much-needed Bach World Catch Up, and some very necessary diversions about the fourth movies in animated movie franchises. To hear the rest of this season of Ancient Kisstory, grab two exclusive episodes per month, and to support the show, head to our brand-new page on Patreon! Our next episode will b+e a Patreon sclusey, so don't miss out - CLICK HERE!

EXTRA CREDIT: Ancient Kisstory - How Little We Knew (Bachelor AU S1 E1)

Brooke Blurton's season of The Bachelorette has come to a close, and the BoH boys are here to break down a fantastic finale week in rigorous detail. We talk about how these episodes subverted our expectations by not subverting our expectations, while still providing space for some incredible moments that are unlike anything we've ever seen before. We heap praise on guests Amy Thunig and Abbie Chatfield for broadening the conversation, and grapple with the nuances of the decisions that led to Brooke's happy ending. Can you tell I'm trying not to put spoilers in the episode description? Also, stay tuned for a little announcement at the end of the episode.

129. Bachelorette Bolognese (Bachelorette AU S7 E11?-12?)

This week, we welcome back special guest & previous longest-episode record-holder Katie Kendall (Not Making Lemonade) to the pod, for an exhaustive rundown of a massive triple-episode week of The Bachelorette! We engage in some art criticism, discuss some interesting family dynamics, and eulogise some beloved fan faves. Plus, we rip into some pretty big topics - how important is having a career plan? Is this season's focus on bisexual representation leaving other queer groups out of the conversation? And why has the show taken so long to talk about Brooke's foot fetish? Give Katie the BoH Bump: Follow @bachiebitching for Bachie live-tweets, and check out @not.making.lemonade on IG for art, poetry, zines and mental health advocacy!

128. Comrade Konrad w/ Katie Kendall! (Bachelorette AU S7 E8-10?)

This week, we're joined once again by Friend Of The Pod Abby Butler (triple j! social media superstar!) for a recap of a single-episode week, which, despite its lack of content, gave us quite a lot to chew on. A Mardi Gras At The SCG group date, a bewildering Paramount sponcon single date, and a couple of intruders (one small and very cold, one very loud and with a big orange wig). Plus, we wildly speculate on some real-life goss involving Konrad and Abbie Chatfield, and share a powerful ballad about the importance of straight people. Give Abby the BoH Bump: find her on Instagram @abbzbutler and TikTok @flabbygutler! BIBLIOGRAPHY: Defining Moments: First Gay Mardi Gras, National Museum of Australia Mardi Gras Parade returns to the Sydney Cricket Ground in 2022, published 14/10/2021 by Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras Mardi Gras Cancels Oxford Street Parade, Will Return to Sydney Cricket Ground in 2022, by Emilie Schäfferling, published 14/10/2021 in Star Observer The Bachelorette's Taje Fowler On Her Move To Quash 'Homogenous' Perception Of First Nations People, by Alicia Vrajlal, published 09/11/2021 in Refinery29

127. Hets at the Gras w/ Abby Butler! (Bachelorette AU S7 E7)

This week, pure good faces off against pure evil as Steve The Human Lie Detector returns to the show, wreaking chaos and leaving suffering in his wake. How is pure, innocent Kurt meant to react? Plus, the forthcoming sequel to a 40-year-old movie sponsors this show populated by 25-year-olds, and we dive deep into the discourse of queer identity, Top Gun, and The Bachelorette. Plus, we attempt the world's longest podcast kiss. BIBLIOGRAPHY: Top Gun and the End of the Homoerotic Action Movie, by Nico Lang, published May 15, 2016 in Consequence Top Gun, Bottom Gun, or Vers Gun?, by Rich Juzwiak, published June 30, 2020 in Jezebel 40+ Australia Gambling Statistics for 2021, by Andriana Moskovska, published July 31, 2021 in Take A Tumble 

126. Bachelor in Paranoia (Bachelorette AU S7 E5-6)

This week, it's the thrilling finale of this chapter of Ancient Kisstory, and our excavation of The Bachelor US Season 1! What high-concept fantasy dates did the producers select for the apex of the season? Who did Alex pick to spend the rest of his life with - and how much of the rest of his life did he spend with her? What became of the happy couple, and what of the scorned cast-off? Why am I pretending nobody has ever Googled any of this information before?

Ancient Kisstory - Pizza Or Chinese Food? (Bachelor US S1 E7)

This EEK on the Bachelor of Hearts podcast - it's our annual arbitrary Halloween special! We're joined by journalist & Bachie expert Matilda Boseley to discuss Week 2 of Brooke's season of The Bachelorette - which included a few pretty incredible milestones for representation of queer communities, a rare moment of passionate, slow-burning tenderness, and a Single Date with a contestant who continues to break down traditionally-held ideas of gender roles and toxic masculinity. So, to celebrate another big week in this landmark season, we of course tried to cram our podcast with as many spooky references as the holiday demands. Give Matilda the BoH Bump: Find her on Twitter @MatildaBoseley! BIBLIOGRAPHY: "The Bachelorette's Ritu Chhina Says She Felt 'Tokenised' At Times During Filming", by Alicia Vrajlal, published in Refinery29 27 October 2021.

125. Haunted By Feminism w/ Matilda Boseley! (Bachelorette AU S7 E3-4)

This week on Ancient Kisstory, we're looking back at the first ever Women Tell All special, to get all the behind-the-scenes gossip straight from the horses' mouths. But since nothing really happened on that episode, we're also presenting an exhaustively researched investigation into Where They Are Now. Was one of the women from this season in Spider-Man? Who was Cyndi Lauper's makeup artist? Who's going to be on the next season of The Apprentice UK? Plus - we conduct a detailed investigation into how many standard drinks of champagne were drunk by each person in season 1, read an excerpt from the Grease Wiki, and urge our listeners to Give Beef To The Boy. BIBLIOGRAPHY "Singles answer show's casting call", by Gary C.W. Chun, published in Honolulu Star-Bulletin December 17, 2001 "Reality TVs reach for the stars: Bachelor finds one in Seattle psychologist", by Mark Rahner, published in Seattle Times March 25, 2002 "'The Bachelor's' LaNease Adams: 'I Was Depressed After Racist Backlash From Alex Michel's Season'", by LaNease Adams, as told to Lindsay Geller, published in Women's Health, July 6, 2020 "What does reality TV owe Black women?", by Bethonie Butler and Emily Yahr, published in Washington Post Oct 14, 2021 "Q&A: Shannon Oliver of "The Bachelor", by whoever runs Super-Hair.net, published in Super-Hair.net December 2002

Ancient Kisstory - Tell Me More (Bachelor US S1 E6)

It's a groundbreaking week for the Bachelor franchise - the first episodes starring the first bisexual and first Indigenous Australian lead in the franchise's history have just aired, and believe it or not - they were really good. We're joined by the great Nat Tencic (triple j, The Hook Up), who shares her perspective as a broadcaster who discusses sex, love and relationships on the regular; as a new Bachie viewer, as a bisexual woman, and as someone who recently got to speak to Brooke about her season. We discuss how Brooke is approaching this season head-on, our impressions of the dynamics forming in the cast during the first two episodes, and how (at least so far) the show is rising to the challenge. Plus, did you realise they're actually making history this season?

124. Making History w/ Nat Tencic! (Bachelorette AU S7 E1-2)

This week on Ancient Kisstory, we do our best to reckon with the psychosexual gauntlet of The Bachelor's first ever 'Fantasy Suites'. That's right: it's Fuck Week for Alex Michel and his three finalists. How does the show convince us for the first time that this is Going To Be A Thing? How does Alex break it to three women that he's planning to fuck all of them? And can he make it through this week without puking? (no) 

Ancient Kisstory - Yikes (Bachelor US S1 E5)

We are SO excited that Brooke Blurton's gamechanging season of The Bachelorette is about to begin! Mere hours after the contestants' profiles went live on 10play, we sat down to pull apart what we could glean from them: both the traditional interview questions and night 1 photos, and also from their linked Instagram pages. We make our predictions for who will win, what kind of characters we're likely to see on the show, and who's likely to be Australia's next big anti-vax influencer. Also - a much-needed sidebar for some important chat about a breakfast cereal commercial from 2004.

123. Johann or Go Home (Bachelorette S7 Preview)

On this episode of Ancient Kisstory, we're looking at the first ever Hometown Dates in Bachelor history. It's an opportunity to reflect on the institutions which run deep throughout the franchise's DNA - Christianity, the city of Dallas, and of course, suffering. It's a little bizarre to see Hometown Dates without the usual cookie-cutter drama: so instead of manufactured 'over-protective dad' tropes, we get naturalistic glimpses of America in 2002 (which just happens to include a few over-protective dads). Plus... a room full of corpses.

Ancient Kisstory - Chanute Salute (Bachelor US S1 E4)

Week 3 of The Bachelor US Season 1 broadens the Bachelor lexicon with the first utterances of "right reasons" and "not here to make friends" - plus the first 'Pretty Woman' date, the first drowned-out musical performance, and the first contestant carted away in an ambulance. A huge episode, in which the blueprint for decades of Bachie torment (or, y'know, fun) continues to be solidified. Plus - we check out the new Bachelorette promos, discuss allegations against a not-so-clean-skin, and name some babies.

Ancient Kisstory - Four Non Brunettes (Bachelor US S1 E3)

Our deep-dive into the protozoic era of The Bachelor continues this week, as we recap an episode full of firsts: the first ever kiss, the first group date, and the first ever LOADED FIREARM... Plus, we look back at contemperanous reviews of the first season as it was airing (hint: people didn't love it!), Max gets to flex his "knowing the names of movies" muscle, and we try and remember the names of all three members of millenial hitmakers fun.  Bibliography: TV Reviews: The Bachelor, by Michael Speier, published Mar 24, 2002 in Variety Popping the Question, by Paul Farhi, published November 20, 2002 in the Washington Post Enter a feminist-free zone, by Ginia Bellafante, published December 12,2002 in The Age; originally published as 'One Small Step for Man, 25 Backward for Women', April 14, 2002 in The New York Times

Ancient Kisstory - A Little Cork (Bachelor US S1 E2)

A perfect Bachelor/ette AU/NZ podcast from Max Quinn & Xavier Rubetzki Noonan.

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