Oh look, tough guy, bet you came into the comments to talk smack about our missing episode. "Heh, Gabe, what did you do, fuckin accidentally delete your entire Audition multitrack session before uploading it to SoundCloud?" No, slapnuts, it's way more complicated than that. And if you wanna spew some shit, you better duck, because there's an eagle soaring from the sky wielding scimitars thanks to Joseph and our brilliant minds in ep. 61's Hypothetical section. Also we reviewed a movie that didn't make us want to claw our eyes out and talked about a mystical quest you could have been following on our side series. So yeah. Fuck you, potential viewer that totally exists. I uh I have friends. Follow us on Twitter @BenderStreet

Bender Street Bullies

Episode 61: No We Didn't Miss 60, Animals Wielding Terrifying Weapons, Rookie Moves

Someone come get Christopher Walken to play a role because the Bender boys have a fever, and the only cure is MORE D&D! This time, Joe has sprung a trap on the unwitting and frankly stupid as hell Manrick and Thorn and embroiled them in a dastardly plot with far-reaching consequences. Will this adventure lead them to the gallows or to the High Life? Also this installment is sponsored by Miller High Life because i fucking said so Follow us on Twitter @BenderStreet

Benders and Beasts, Adventure #2, Part 1: Diplomatic Immunity Oink Oink

Not content with the podcast lane of burdensome recordings, the poorly hidden nerd boyz of the Bender Street have branched off into the oldest test of virginity known to man: Dungeons & Dragons. In this side series, known colloquially as Benders and Beasts, we start off with Joe as DM guiding the relative and extreme newbies of Pebs and Gabe through an adventure in the bustling metropolis of Bellywynn. These two travellin ass hoes roll into town in search of money, work, and a good time. How many of those will they find when pursuing a fantastic piece of kitchen equipment? Tune in to find out!! Still follow us on Twitter @BenderStreet

Benders and Beasts, Adventure #1: Out of the Shipping Route, Into the Frying Pan

If you thought we were innovators based on the 86 million times we've audibly called ourselves innovators, then you should see us tearing down this cul-de-sac of the Bender Street and finding new ways to make Joe okay with an episode going over an hour and a half again. But, as I said during and I'll repeat here in a needlessly inflammatory way towards people who are never going to be aware of Episode 59's existence, PMT goes longer than us and we put way more content in this bitch. Examples! 2 New Segments! A possibly pointless argument about Vince Carter's legacy as a basketball player! And plenty of moments where Pebs feels unsafe. It's like Olive Garden says, "When you're here, make out with a British chick and see if it'll make Mr. Mannix jealous." Follow us on Twitter @BenderStreet

Episode 59: Independence (Draft) Day, Vince Carter Slander, P.D. (Pebs Dumbcrap) Live

They say that necessity is the mother of invention* and that Joe isn't ready to be a dad. Either way, his thrusts into the group Google Doc sowed a rich crop of segment ideas good enough to constitute its own unique and endearing edition of the Pitching Cage. That would be enough to earn your listen, but on TOP of that, we have an actual Irishman speaking drunkenly about Irish history, which is the first time that anyone from the Emerald Isle has gotten sozzled and ended up successfully on top of anything. (It's because they're usually getting arrested.) EB, JRC -- it's right inside, crack the lid and shatter that mothafuckin pringles can all over the metaphorical church carpet!! Follow us on Twitter @BenderStreet *I'm kind of sure that I started a previous description with this phrase, if you're a big enough nerd to dig back through and find it I'll venmo you $12

Episode 58: Erase Your Sports Pain, Do a Drunk History™️, Come Up With a New Segment

Episode 57: Double Deep Hypothetical, Extra Effort Drunk Philosophy, The NBA's Optics Problem by Bender Street Bullies

Episode 57: Double Deep Hypothetical, Extra Effort Drunk Philosophy, The NBA's Optics Problem

Even though the initial public shock over the murder of George Floyd has somewhat subsided, that does not mean it's time to consider the point made or the battle won. There are still a myriad of ways you can contribute to the Black Lives Matter movement and we encourage you to utilize as many as you possibly can. This week on Bender Street Bullies, unlike most times one of us gets into an intimate situation, a tease actually pays off as Hollywood screenwriter Joe Petrone bursts into the pitching cage with his Dallas Dawg Park script and fends off all manner of high heat with his sitcom shaped like an aluminum bat. Top that off with the double sprinkles of twin-barrel Hypotheticals and the chopped nuts you can find in live-action Hinge Corner, and Epsiode 56 promises to put you in a sun-daze. Ugh. No. I'm gonna cut that in post Follow us on Twitter @BenderStreet

Episode 56: Double Shallow Hypothetical, DDP, Do it Live Hinge Corner

During a horrific moment in our country's history, which is merely a more stark reminder of the unfathomable levels of violence and bigotry that people of color face every day, we throw this episode up not as a means of ignoring reality or searching for an escape, but rather as a reminder that combatting racism and being aware of its constant presence is something that you can always do no matter your other obligations. Take action. Keep your thoughts with the families of the victims, both those known and unknown. Be safe. We hope you enjoy the episode. https://www.bailoutnetwork.com

Episode 55: Black Lives Matter (incl. Drunk Philosophy and Movie Review)

Are you KIDDING me with the length of that thing? -Ha, no, Jessica Alba, I am not. Doing no research whatsoever to write a description, this is indeed the longest episode by runtime of the esteemed podcast Bender Street Bullies. However, not only will you find in filling your ears with the duration of this nectar that it is well worth the investment, but this installment's size is due to us staying true to our humble roots and doing absolutely everything that got us to this point. That includes: a hypothetical! Being annoying! Sports, somehow! And, of course, Gabe insisting that we overstay our welcome. Sorry for the fact that I'm gonna house all your Mint Milanos and pass out pantsless on your couch. You can make it up to yourself by giving this a listen ;) Follow us on Twitter @BenderStreet

Episode 54: It's Draft Day, Existential NO-hilism, Glass Carson (That Funky Carson)

It's like the old saying goes: you can lead a Bully to decent cinema, but they're probably just going to end up reviewing overblown 2000s road adventure comedies instead. But enough horsing around. Let's talk Episode 53 on the Bender Street! We roll with the classics, but with a renewed sense of vigor following the weekend's hotly contested continuation of the Jack Russell Cup. When it comes to Weird News and Hypotheticals, we prove why we're still the hottest game in town. And you won't believe how sinister it can get in the revamped intro to Review. Snap into a...Thick Jim? What? Who wrote this copy? Follow us on Twitter @BenderStreet

Episode 53: Wine Truck Ridin', Memory Skill Acquirin', Rat Race Rappin'

Episode 52: Sleep Without Blankets, Make Your Pong Shots or Die, Dip Hot Cheetos in Nutella by Bender Street Bullies

Episode 52: Sleep Without Blankets, Make Your Pong Shots or Die, Dip Hot Cheetos in Nutella

What if I told you that every resident of the Bender Street had their own story that they felt deserved a Last Dance-style doc? You'd be completely unsurprised given the fact that we continue this here vanity project week after week for an audience of nobody? Well aren't you perceptive, phantom listener! The fact still remains though that we're going to discuss those segments of our lives destined for the full cinematic treatment, just as we're going to delve into why women in the Czech Republic get whipped with branches and all the reasons to never leave Hinge, the greatest dating app in the history of the world and also our most specialest sponsor. Pour yourself a cup of Swag Cola and sip away to the sounds of the Bullyin' Boys! Follow us on Twitter @BenderStreet

Episdode 51: Regular Guy 30 for 30s, First Date Greatest Fears, Terrible Dating Apps Named Playoff

One can liken the passage of time to the whirling of a recklessly shaken snowglobe -- at times, it feels blinding and results in dizziness, but even as the flakes are moved to new locales, there are always moments of rest and constancy within the chaos. The contents of existence stay remarkably the same. In that way, it should be no great shock that the Bullies arrive on Bender Street bearing the Silver Jubilee ensign; hitting Episode 50 as turmoil in the public and private sphere spray out like so many synthetic snow pellets. Can we fix anything? No, certainly not. But what we can do is revel in the company of those who stay by our sides though we may not deserve such loyalty, and delight all lucky and appreciated listeners with a coterie of classic segments. YEAH HINGE CORNER IS BACK IT'LL BE BURIED WITH US WHEN THIS PODCAST DIES. Also Joe's cranky lol Follow us on Twitter @BenderStreet I'm sorry, Lauren

Episode 50: Corona Flops Forward, Walking Marches On, Hinge Corner Resurrects

While our podcast and the Corona-based stay-in-place orders differ in that you know when ours is going to end, they can both agree on being probably longer than is enjoyable for you. The inevitable news, though, is that neither of them are going anywhere! A pandemic cannot puncture our already-remote bonds of broadcast, and thus the Bender Street remains one of the only ones in the country that isn't all tumbleweedy and deserted. Episode 49 gives you a tablespoon of reality in touching on topical events and situations in Weird News and Hypothetical, then spins into the fun and Joe-head-bashing with Experience Bidding and a very angst-ridden Movie Review. Plus, hear how things are going with the Jack Russell Cup, and uhh eat a steak! Live a little! Fight a wolverine while you can. But listen up. Also, follow us on Twitter @BenderStreet

Episode 49: Unlikely Scrub Donors, Corona's Grocery Games, Forever My Girl pt. 1

You remember that scene in the Watchmen movie when Rorschach says, "I'm not stuck in here with you, you're stuck in here with me!" I think later on he also breaks into a jig and asks "Can I get a bitta that Kit Kat bar?" But I digress, and I also lose the original point of what I was saying, which I found upon snacking on a Kit Kat bar! Kit Kat -- throw us some bones. What I mean is that with the quarantine being extended through the month, you're gonna have a long time to get to know us via our brilliant segments and incandescent riffs. We've got 3 classically great features this week, plus an update on the inaugural Jack Russell Cup which comes complete with a fresh YouTube channel! Suck it out the reservoir. Follow us on Twitter @BenderStreet

Episode 48: T-Shirt TP, All-Animal Sentience, Recommendations for Rivals

Ramblings from three former swimmers with an axe to grind regarding sports and each other. New episodes recorded every Monday. Follow us on Twitter: @BenderStreet

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Bender Street Bullies

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