David Correlli’s mandolin would have been a better movie.  John Connor takes notice of more odd telephone behavior in this film.  Can someone tell Corelli he is an Assistant D.A. not a cop or detective?  Who saves tins full of pubic hair?  Hey, it’s the Mogwai guy.  Bowen misses his chance for a “ the eradicator” reference.  What about this sex pillow? Contact us @cinemapoisonpodcast@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter @CinemaPoison “This is rage”

Cinema Poison

Episode 66, Jade

When will George ever watch the Run the Jewels video “Close your eyes and count to fuck” that Bowen has been recommending for years?  Is Sonny Landham’s character in every film named Billy?  James Remar has a doppelgänger and his name is Ben Barnes.  We try to navigate through a field of slur land mines.  How many times does Nolte say “fuck” in this movie?  Is Luther tiny enough to fit through a keyhole?  Elaine doesn’t understand how phones work.  Reggie finally gets his dick wet. Contact us at cinemapoisonpodcast@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter @CinemaPoison 

Episode 65, 48 Hrs.

How secure are our Military’s secrets?  Short answer, not very.  John Connor starts off the episode very confused.  Why do all these movies have a shitty younger brother or sister?  Who would win in a dick sucking competition, Doug Masters or Knotcher?  What is with this dirt bike vs. plane race?  We try not to die like Jimmy Branson at Devils Face.  Bowen references his since abandoned YouTube channel.  George wants to play with the boys in their danger zones.  Zero chance Chappie would risk his life and career to help this fucker.  Drink every time one of us says ludicrous.  Of course many Top Gun references are made.  Would you pay money for an audiobook narrated by Chappie? Contact us at cinemapoisonpodcast@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter @CinemaPoison “Chappiiiiieeeeee!!!”

Episode 64, Iron Eagle

How is it possible that none of us made a RoboCorpse joke?  The Giggler from Death Wish 3 recommended his brother, The Laugher for this film.  Why does this Kill-Bot make big cat noises?  Who wants a Blaupunkt car stereo?  Looking at you MacGruber.  Murphy gets murdered in less than two hours on his first day.  Imagine Peter Weller with a nipple piercing.  Bowen squeezes in yet another Mallrats reference.  I’ll buy that for a dollar.Follow us on Twitter @CinemaPoison Contact us at cinemapoisonpodcast@gmail.com            “I’m being raped too!!!”

Episode 63, RoboCop

George squeezes in a “Loaded Weapon” reference.  George was also unable to finish the films alternate endings.  Bowen wishes Michael Madsen was in this movie cutting his own body off.  John Connor is one more bad movie pick from being kicked off the podcast.  Does Michael McKean refer to his butthole as Candlestick Park? Contact us at cinemapoisonpodcast@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter @CinemaPoison  

Episode 62, Clue

Here a wig, there a wig, everywhere a wig wig.  Why does Sebastian have a MacGruber haircut?  Why do we need a flashback of a thing that happened five minutes ago?  Just show the thing that happened!  George is excited that “We Hate Movies” started doing “Melro210” episodes again.  Check out these awesome spanking spoons.  Why does Rayne spend half of this film in a cage?  Finally, is Udo Kier a real life vampire? Contact us at cinemapoisonpodcast@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter @CinemaPoison

Episode 61, BloodRayne

Get ready for dick jokes galore.  How do you feel about this celery stalk holder?  Is it possible to forget how to perform a throat rip?  We never do see the big brown egg.  Try to catch the WKUK reference.  We are more of a three wire kinda podcast. contact us at cinemapoisonpodcast@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter @CinemaPoison

Episode 60, MacGruber

The wrestling promo episode. contact us at cinemapoisonpodcast@gmail.com follow us on Twitter @CinemaPoison

TV Revisited, Wings Episode 7, The Puppetmaster

Dolph is stiff as a board in this film.  Where are all the extras in this movie?  We discuss the financial decisions of Cannon.  Teela is super trigger happy.  Why is Man-at-Arms sixty years old?  George accidentally breaks into his ‘Hispanic Arnold’ voice for a split second.  Blink and you will miss this Goldust lookalike. Contact us at cinemapoisonpodcast@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter @CinemaPoison                ...living in a box.  

Episode 59, Masters of the Universe

The Podcast Suicide Episode. Contact us at cinemapoisonpodcast@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter @CinemaPoison

TV Revisited, Wings Episode 6 - Season Finale, All for One and Two for Helen

This may be the worst movie we have reviewed on this podcast.  Why is every actor debasing themselves in this film?  Sir Ben Kingsley, why would you even consider this role?  This was a tough one to get through.  You can audibly hear the disgust in our voices as we talk about this film.  Could “The Love Guru” be any more racist?  Who wants to play stinky mop?  Contact us at cinemapoisonpodcast@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter @CinemaPoison              ... “hot pockets”

Episode 58, The Love Guru

We give Steven Weber a break for an episode.  This week we discuss 1990’s gymnastics and believe it or not... we talk about Wings!

TV Revisited, Wings Episode 5, There Once Was a Girl From Nantucket

What if Tom Hardy was so committed to this role that he actually pissed and shit himself?  Why make a movie about this part of Al Capone’s life?  Al Capone doesn’t understand where piss comes from.  What is his obsession with this dick and balls statue? George sneaks in another “The Shining” reference.  Bowen passes on an opportunity to make a Terry Maitland reference but proceeds to make one mere moments later.  Both George and Bowen manage to pull a Marlon Brando “The Island of Dr. Moreau” reference.  How long did it take Capone to get this gold camo on his Tommy gun in Call of Duty?   contact us at cinemapoisonpodcast@gmail.com follow us on Twitter @CinemaPoison

Episode 57, Capone

Four fucking idiots barely talking about Wings.  Contact us at cinemapoisonpodcast@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter @CinemaPoison

TV Revisited, Wings Episode 4, Return to Nantucket ‘part 2’

Okay, who brought the acid?  What is up with this earthquake button?  How does hot hail even work?  What is the story behind this lab/greenhouse?  George finds a home for an “Ambiguously Gay Duo” reference.  We get some bad pedal placement in this phone booth wait, rocket.  This film is quite sexually charged considering it has a PG rating.  Contact us at cinemapoisonpodcast@gmail.com, follow us on Twitter @CinemaPoison                       ...Klytus, I’m bored.

Episode 56, Flash Gordon (1980)

Hey folks, we are a show that likes to poke a little fun at movies.

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Cinema Poison

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