I was speaking to a crowd of people who gathered in the zechut of a young woman who was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer, lo alenu . Afterward, the woman requested to speak to me. She thanked me for the words of chizuk , which were aimed at getting the crowd to make a kabala in her merit. Then she said, baruch Hashem, she herself did not need any chizuk . She has been learning emunah for many years and because of it, she is rock solid. She said she is going to utilize this time to get even closer to Hashem and appreciate her life even more. Then she said she wanted to share some words of chizuk for others to realize how valuable their kabalot and deeds really are. About ten years ago, her grandmother passed away and her father was lamenting the fact that he would no longer be able to communicate with his mother. Then he got chizuk from some words he read in the sefer Ahavat Chesed from the Chofetz Chaim. There, the Rabbi was discussing the subject of helping those who have already passed on. He said not to spend large amounts of money on monuments or the like, but rather to use the money for zechuyot for the niftar or the nifteret . That is the way in which we will truly help them. Her father then spoke to the entire family, telling them that the way they could all still communicate with his mother was by doing good deeds in her merit. He then gave them a mashal to bring out the point. He said he once heard that when the Mirrer Yeshiva was on the run, escaping from the Nazis, Rav Aharon Kotler was working feverishly to send packages to them to help them survive. The Rabbi did not know if those packages were actually reaching them or perhaps they were being dumped into the ocean, but he did not stop working on their behalf. Later on he was told by those boys that the packages, indeed, enabled them to survive. The father said, “Similarly, we do mitzvot and good deeds on behalf of those who passed away. We don’t know if our deeds are reaching them but one day we are going to see how much each and every deed actually did benefit them.” This woman was inspired by her father’s speech and she took the initiative to organize something the entire family would do to raise the neshama of her grandmother. Every year two weeks before the yahrzeit , she would send fliers to the entire family, requesting that each day they would each give two different people either a compliment or lift up their spirits, as well as give a small amount of tzedaka l’ilui nishmata . This went on for four years. In the fifth year, she saw her grandmother in a dream. Her grandmother was saying she was going to come eat with her that Shabbat. She then went to her closet to pick out her Shabbat clothing but she said she couldn’t see the clothing. She kept searching and saying, “I can’t see the clothing. I can’t find any of my clothing.” Then she said she wouldn’t be able to eat with her because she didn’t have any Shabbat clothing to wear. The woman woke up troubled by the dream. She related it to a rabbi who told her that clothing in the Next World represents a person’s deeds. She must have been saying that she is lacking certain deeds. That is when the woman realized it was already just one week before her grandmother’s yahrzeit and she forgot to send out the papers reminding everyone to do the deeds in her zechut . She then appreciated how much her family’s actions were really benefiting her grandmother in the Upper World. There is so much that goes on that we can’t see. We must never underestimate how special our mitzvot are. We may not be able to see their effects now but one day we will see how valuable each and every one of them really are.

Daily Emunah Podcast - Daily Emunah By Rabbi David Ashear

One Day We Will See

אשריכם ישראל – how fortunate our people are! When we hear of someone who is in need of rachamei Shamayim , we make public gatherings with divrei chizuk to help inspire the community to accept upon themselves to become better in an area of avodat Hashem as a merit for the person to be helped. And this goes on all of the time and everybody happily improves, hoping that Hashem will send a salvation. We should never underestimate the power of those kabbalot . Although down here it may seem like a simple matter, in Shamayim those deeds do wonders. A woman told me, some years back she went to a gathering where rabbis were speaking about the importance of tzniut – modesty. At the end of the speeches, a rabbi got up and implored the crowd to take something upon themselves right at that moment – a kabbala to improve in tzniut . The person called it like bringing a korban to Hashem. And he said if they would write down their kabbalot on a piece of paper with their Hebrew name, he would submit it to rabbanim who would pray on their behalf. This woman was very inspired to make a kabbala . She saw a long line of people quickly forming to fill out those papers. Her husband had sent her a message that he was worried about her driving home that night, being that the roads were very icy. It was already late at night and she didn’t want her husband to have to wait up for her worrying longer. She said to herself, she would just tell her kabbala to Hashem and ask Him for what she was going to ask the rabbis to pray for. On the way home, she thought about it and she decided that she was going to throw out three articles of clothing which she knew did not conform to the highest levels of modesty. She said, “Hashem, I don’t know what it’s worth, but this is a great sacrifice for me. Please, my grandmother is suffering in so much pain. Please take away her pain in the merit of this korban .” The woman told me that a couple of months before this, her elderly grandmother had been diagnosed with a certain form of cancer. The doctors said that she was too old to go through any type of treatment. They warned that when the cancer spread it would cause her immeasurable pain. And now, she began experiencing that pain and her family couldn’t bear to watch it. Two days after this woman’s kabbala , her father called her from the hospital to update her on the condition of her grandmother. She noted that she is one of twelve siblings and her father rarely speaks to her about what’s going on with her grandmother. This time, however, he specifically called her. He said, “The doctors just discovered that it wasn’t the cancer spreading which caused Grandma this pain. It was some other type of virus which just cleared up. Baruch Hashem, the cancer did not spread at all and she feels great now.” Her grandmother ended up living almost an entire additional year pain free, attending multiple weddings of her grandchildren. The hashgacha here was very obvious. This woman brought a korban to Hashem and Hashem answered her tefila in a miraculous way, and then Hashem showed her that she was the cause of it by having her father specifically call her to tell her that news. Our deeds are very powerful. The greater the sacrifice, the greater the deed becomes.

The Greater the Sacrifice

Whatever happens in a person’s life is governed only by Hashem. Doctors' predictions and statistics have no bearing on what Hashem will decide. Mitzvot and ma’asim tovim , however, have a major impact, as well as our tefilot . And therefore, whenever a person is facing any type of adversity, the first step is always to think about how he could improve in his avodat Hashem. Rabbi Elimelech Biderman told a story that was told to him by Rabbi Mordechai Moskowitz from Ashdod. Rabbi Moskowitz’s wife passed away last month. They had seventeen children who all have beautiful families. During the shiva , her doctor, who is not religious, called the rabbi to tell him how much emunah he had gained from treating his wife. He went on to remind the rabbi of when his wife was diagnosed four years before this. At that time, he told her it was already too late for any types of treatments and she had a maximum of six weeks left to live. After hearing the news, she remained calm and composed and the doctor asked her how she could be so calm? She replied that she had an insurance policy to live longer. She explained to the doctor that it says in the Torah honoring parents prolongs life, and she takes care of her elderly mother round the clock like nobody else could. The doctor reiterated, according to the natural way of the world, six weeks was all she had. He gave her some pills to take and she left the office. She went on to live for an additional four years, just taking those pills. Her mother passed away two and a half months ago and she passed away exactly six weeks after that. The doctor concluded the conversation with the rabbi saying to him, “Your wife taught me that Hashem runs the world,” and he is more religious now because of that. A young rabbi told me that a congregant of his asked to come with his wife to speak to him in private. They came over to his house and they told him they have been married for two years and still were not blessed with children. The doctors were not able to detect any problems and now they were coming and asking for rabbinic advice. The rabbi told them, perhaps Hashem is waiting for them to grow more spiritually. He suggested that the woman begin to dress modestly according to the halacha . She said she was willing to try anything but that would have to wait two weeks because she was going on a cruise in a few days and already bought her entire wardrobe for it. The rabbi said, “I think just the opposite. The more self-sacrifice involved in any deed, the greater the deed becomes.” He recommended to her that she start the following day and dress modestly on the cruise, although it would be very difficult for her. In the end, she took the Rabbi’s advice. Just a few weeks later, this woman called the rabbi thanking him from the bottom of her heart. The doctor had just confirmed that she was, indeed, expecting her first child. What happens in our lives is determined only by Hashem. The best thing we can do to improve our situation is always tefila and mitzvot.

The Best Way to Improve Our Situation

In this week’s parasha Teruma , the Jewish People were asked to donate money to build a Mishkan for Hashem. And in turn, Hashem would come and dwell amongst them. Hashem did not need any of their money for the project. After all, He owns all the money in the world. But rather, He was giving them the zechut to give and thereby earn eternal merits from it. The pasuk says, ויקחו לי תרומה – Hashem called their giving taking, because we can’t really give Hashem anything. However, through our self-sacrifice, Hashem considers it like we gave Him something, but in actuality, we are really taking. We are earning the zechut of the mitzvah and the tzedaka that we give is rewarded here as well with Hashem giving us back the money we gave, plus more. We are supposed to feel that it is our greatest privilege to give money to help someone in need or to use in the performance of a mitzvah. Hashem appreciates every bit of self-sacrifice we have when we give money and He is ne'eman to pay it back. A man told me he was called by a yeshiva asking for help. He decided he was going to extend himself being that the yeshiva was in such great need and had so many students learning there. He pledged on the spot to give $400 a month which equaled to $4800 for the year. A couple of days later, his mortgage company contacted him saying that he was overpaying. They sent him a check for $5000 and said, going forward, he will be paying $5000 less per year. Another man told me he received a $14,000 credit towards a large debt that he owed. His rabbi told him he didn’t have to give ma’aser on that but he said he wanted to anyway. He donated $1,400 to a worthy cause. The next day, a credit showed up on his credit card bill for $1,431. He waited the entire week to see if the amount would be deducted from his bank account, but it never was. A rabbi told me, he always makes sure to get an aliyah at the Torah in honor of Rosh Chodesh. A couple of months ago, Rosh Chodesh was on a Friday. He went to a minyan to pray Shacharit where the aliyot usually sold for 5 shekel a piece. He is a Yisrael, but that day somehow, aliyat Yisrael got up to 50 shekel. He thought to himself, there was one more aliyah and he would wait for that one, but the bidding of that aliyah went even higher, it got to 90 shekel. He only had a total of 100 shekel on him. He was planning on using most of that money to buy things for Shabbat, but with mesirut nefesh he bid 100 shekel and he got the aliyah. The gabai asked him for the money right then and there. This meant he would have to drive all the way back to his home to get more money and then come back to this area to get what he needed for Shabbat, but for him it was worth all the efforts to get an aliyah to the Torah. As he pulled away from the shul, at the first traffic light right in front of his car there was a paper that kept circling. He got out of the car to go look at it and he saw it was a 100 shekel bill. He looked around, it didn’t belong to anybody. It just blew from somewhere. He thanked Hashem for showing him how much He appreciated his efforts and he used that money to buy what he needed for Shabbat. One other person told me he found out about a person in great need of help. He himself is a rebbe in a yeshiva and he only had $1600 in his savings account. He and his wife decided the cause was worthy enough for them to give up their savings money for it. Later on, a wealthy man found out about what they did. He reimbursed them for the full $1600 and seeing how pressing that need was, he donated over $10,000 of his own money to help that person in need. When we are motivated l’shem Shamayim , Hashem uses that money to go to the right places. He also gives us the zechut of the mitzvah and, later on, He pays us back the money plus more.

Parashat Teruma: Giving is Getting

If a person was standing to earn a large amount of money and he was planning how he was going to use that money to help many different organizations and needy people. And then all of a sudden the deal turned sour and he did not earn anything from it, he may start to think to himself: I don’t understand, I was going to do so many great things with this money. Why didn’t Hashem give it to me? Doesn’t He want all the poor people to be supported? The first thing this person needs to realize is that Hashem does not need anyone to support the poor. If someone is a major supporter of any type of organization, he should feel so fortunate that Hashem is giving him the merit to support it. However, he must know if he wasn’t supporting it, someone else would. If the organization is worthy of being in existence, then Hashem will ensure that it gets the money it needs to survive. A man told me, he was on the verge of earning a large fortune and he was so excited to begin working on opening a much needed Torah center in his community with the profits, as well as funding much needed renovations in his shul. In the end, he lost the deal and was not able to contribute even minimally to those projects. But, a different person in the community did earn a large amount of money and he ended up doing exactly what this person wanted to do. The Torah center is now built and flourishing and the shul has been renovated. The man told me, “When I was planning out what to do with the money, I honestly thought that these projects would only get done if I made this deal, but I now see Hashem has many ways.” If a person thought he was going to get money and in the end he didn’t, it’s a very big kapara , without the person having to actually lose anything. He should thank Hashem for all of the ups and downs that took place during the ordeal and recognize it was all for his good. If he had been praying, every one of his tefilot brought him closer to Hashem and he’ll be rewarded for all of them. Furthermore, just because Hashem determined it would not be good for him to have the money he wanted at this time, it does not mean that it will not be good for him to have it in the future. A person should never say, “That was my one chance to finally have some breathing room in life and now that I lost it, it’ll never come again.” The same way that Hashem gave him this opportunity out of nowhere, He could just as easily give him another, similar opportunity. A man told me he had what he thought was a once in a lifetime opportunity that if it went according to plan it would allow him to quit his job and spend his days learning Torah and doing avodat Hashem. Everything was going perfectly, but then, at the last minute, it all fell apart. He was back to earning a small salary, scrounging to make ends meet each month. He said to himself, “That was my one opportunity and now it’s gone.” Less than a year later, a totally different opportunity came his way with very similar potential earnings. In the end, that one also fell through, but he said, “What I thought was impossible, Hashem showed me is possible.” The opportunities are endless. If a person’s time comes for him to be blessed with money, Hashem knows how to find him. Until that time, a person must know he is living with the exact finances that Hashem knows he needs to live with to do his job properly. Nobody has any say in the amount of money a person earns except for Hashem. He should never feel that a circumstance made him lose out on a certain deal, or a comment made by another individual. Everything is always part of Hashem’s plan for him and Hashem knows exactly what is best for everyone all of the time.

Endless Opportunities

If a person is in need of assistance from others but no one is around to help him, what should he do then? The answer, as always, is to pray. Hashem could put thoughts in other people’s minds to come and give us the help that we need, right when we need it. We have seen time and time again how Hashem has given people the immediate assistance that they were seeking. A Rabbi from Bnei Brak said he once came to the bus station in Yerushalayim , trying to catch the last bus that leaves from there to Bnei Brak at 1:00 am. When he arrived, he saw there were already about 200 people waiting. He thought to himself, even if 3 buses would come, there still wouldn’t be enough room for him to get on, which meant, in the normal course of events, he would have to stay overnight in Yerushalayim . The problem was that he didn’t have a place to stay. He walked a short distance away from the bus stop and began praying from the depths of his heart, saying, “ HaKadosh Baruch Hu , I know only You could help me. Please, help me get home so I can sleep and be able to serve You properly with my regular schedule tomorrow.” When he finished his tefila , a car pulled up next to him and a window rolled down. A passenger asked him if he needed a ride to Bnei Brak. He happily replied yes and took the last remaining seat in the back. While on their way, he was told how he was zocheh to such a clear hashgacha pratit from Hashem. A father and son were on their way to Bnei Brak with the son driving the car. When they passed the bus stop, they felt so bad for all those people waiting and decided to offer a few people a ride. The father told the son they could fit three in the back, but the son was nervous to squeeze a third in his small back seat and so they only picked up two. But, as they were driving away, the son felt remorse, feeling that maybe he could have taken a third, so they stopped next to that Rabbi, asking him if he needed a ride. Hashem answered his tefila on the spot. A different Rabbi told me, a couple of years ago on Chol HaMoed Sukkot, the roof of his sukkah totally collapsed. He has a very large sukkah and it would have taken him hours to restore. There was no one around to help him and it was a very big job. He turned to Hashem and prayed that He help him put the sukkah back together. An hour later, the Rabbi got a phone call from a man saying that he is from Lakewood, New Jersey and he came to Brooklyn for the day. He learned that it is proper to visit one’s Rabbi on Chol Hamoed and said he considers himself a student of the Rabbi, being that he listens to so many of his classes online. He asked the Rabbi if he had a few minutes to spare for him to come visit. The Rabbi was home alone that day and was happy to invite this man over. A half hour later he showed up and they sat in the Rabbi’s living room. The man asked the Rabbi if they could please sit in the sukkah. The Rabbi explained to him what happened. The man told him his job for two months a year is building sukkot and he would be happy to go fix it. When the man saw the damage, he told the Rabbi, “I know exactly what to do. I don’t need any help. You go learn and I’ll do the job.” Thirty minutes later, the sukkah was as good as new. What were the odds that of all the people in the world, a sukkah builder would call this Rabbi, asking to come to his house at that specific time? The power of tefillah is amazing and we should utilize it as much as we can.

The Amazing Power of Tefillah

Both Rabbenu Yona and the Ba’al HaCharedim write that having bitachon in Hashem is a mitzvat aseh from Torah, and like all other mitzvot, its rewards will be paid in the next world. However, this particular mitzvah is one of those which is also rewarded in this world. The pasuk in Yirmiyah describes some of the beautiful rewards that the ba’al bitachon has here in this world. He is compared to a tree planted near water which spreads out its roots amongst a brook. The tree is never afraid of heat or drought, it’s leaves are always fresh and it never stops producing fruit. Although heat and drought normally cause trees to wither, this tree is not afraid because it has its own source of irrigation. And so is true of the bote’ach b’Hashem , no matter what’s going on in the natural way of the world, he is never afraid because he is connected to his own source – the Source of everything. How do we connect to Hashem, the Source of everything? It all depends on our recognition of His control. The more a person believes that only Hashem is in charge, the greater is his bitachon and the more connected he becomes to Hashem. I was speaking to a man the other day who definitely qualifies as a bote’ach b’Hashem and I asked him if he had any recent episodes in which he displayed that bitachon . He replied, he was looking to buy a house in Brooklyn and he found something that he liked. He gave the real estate broker an offer which he felt was a fair price for that house. When she heard the number, she told him, “There is no way you will get this house for that price.” He told me when he heard that, the first thought that entered his mind was that this person has absolutely no say on whether or not he is going to get the house at that price. Only Hashem decides who gets which house and only Hashem decides how much a person should pay for that house. And so, although she tried to intimidate him to bid higher, he said with confidence, “This is the fair value and this is my offer. If it’s meant for me then it will work out.” Six months later, the real estate agent called back saying, “If you want the house, you can have it at your price.” He said, “Baruch Hashem,” and signed the contract. She then told him why the situation had changed. Originally, when he made his offer, she had someone else who had already offered $100,000 more than him and so she was very confident that he would not get the house at his price. However, the other bidder ended up having trouble qualifying for a mortgage. The back and forth of that took six months. When the owner of the house found out what had happened, he was very upset that it had dragged on for so long. He was planning on having the house sold way before that time. He asked the real estate agent if there were any other bidders and she said the next highest bid was for $100,000 cheaper. The owner said, “Just take it.” The man said, “I know who runs the world. I don’t get intimidated by people.” He will of course be rewarded for his bitachon in the next world, but he is also enjoying the benefits of it in this world as well.

Enjoy the Benefits

A man told me he became inspired after hearing a class about the power of answering אמן יהא שמיה רבה מברך... with kavana . It is a great praise that we give Hashem and it has the power to change decrees. He had been struggling for months trying to close a large business deal. One party involved was being very stubborn and not allowing it to go through. It seemed like they had hit an insurmountable roadblock. The man strengthened himself saying, “People are not in charge of holding back business deals, only Hashem is and if Hashem is holding it back it must only be for my best.” He decided to think about that while praising Hashem during the words יהא שמיה רבה מברך in Kaddish. The next time he was in shul, he said those words with great kavana . About an hour later, the party who was holding back the deal called him saying he decided he would proceed if certain things would be done. The man said it was amazing, he hadn’t been in contact with him for two weeks and right after the יהא שמיה רבה he called. He continued having kavana the entire week and, baruch Hashem, on Thursday of that week the deal was finally closed. It’s so nice to see a glorious end to an emunah story, but as we know, things do not always happen that way. Sometimes people respond with emunah but don’t receive the salvation they were hoping for. They must know, the response they had is the greatest gain. Hashem will bring the yeshua if and when the time is right, but the rewards for the response will be paid for all eternity. We can’t imagine the value of having even one heroic emunah response. A man sent me an email a while back and at that time he did not want the email to be publicized. He wanted to wait at least 2 years before publicizing it. And now, that time has come. I do not know any details to the conclusion of the story he told, but in my mind, the response itself is the whole story. He said that he had gone through a divorce that he did not really want. And to make matters worse, one of his children, a daughter, took sides with her mother and refused to have any communication or contact with him. He used to be so close to that daughter and then, all of a sudden, all communication had to end with her. The pain of losing his wife and his daughter was overwhelming. He entered into a darkness which he never experienced before. People tried to give him chizuk but he could not be consoled. One day, he saw a talmid chacham in his shul reading the book Living Emunah. He inquired about it and the rabbi told him it had a tremendous influence on improving the quality of his life and he suggested that he should get it as well. The man went to get it the next day and never put it down. And then, read Volume 2 afterward. He said the following in the email, “I felt so distant from the ba’al bitachon that is described in the book, but nevertheless I tried to live the lessons the book was teaching. It was nothing short of a miracle that my attitude in life started to improve. I stopped constantly sulking and, once again held my head up, and for the first time in my life, I looked forward to praying. Every day I would read and reread and I became a different person. I clearly see that Hashem is in charge of all events that take place and He loves me more than my parents and that everything He does is good. I can’t exactly see how my daughter distancing herself from me is good, but I have no questions. I trust that He is doing everything for my own benefit. I have recently discovered that my daughter got engaged and I was told by someone else that I would not be allowed to attend the wedding. Before I learned emunah, that news would have devastated me. Now, I pray that my daughter should build a bayit ne’eman . I also pray to Hashem that He will allow me to attend the wedding, but if He doesn’t I will accept it and on the night of the wedding I will dance alone in my apartment. A while back I told my rav that if I would not be allowed to attend my daughter’s wedding, I would appreciate it if he wouldn’t go as well. After learning emunah, I begged the rabbi to disregard what I told him and rather participate in any simcha my daughter makes. Why should I prevent Hashem’s ratzon ? I even told the rav that I would be willing to pay for the wedding, even if I couldn’t attend.” That was basically the end of the email. I hope that man was able to dance at his daughter’s wedding. But even if he wasn’t, his emunah response was his greatest gain, something that he will be rewarded for l’netzach netzachim .

The Greatest Gain

The work Shomer Emunim writes that the best advice that can be given to a person facing any sort of problem is to realize that we are helpless without Hashem. Regardless of how smart we are or what kind of strategies we can devise, the Shomer Emunim writes, we know nothing and are incapable of helping ourselves. David Ha’melech describes himself in Tehillim as כגמל עלי אמו – like an infant nursing from his mother. Rav Shimshon Pincus explained that when a child wakes up in the middle of the night and complains of thirst, his mother will simply tell him to get a drink. But when an infant wakes up crying in the middle of the night, the mother immediately jumps out of bed and rushes to nurse the baby. She realizes that the infant cannot help himself and is entirely dependent on her, and so she goes to help him. Similarly, when we need help, and we recognize that we are like an infant, helpless and entirely dependent on the Almighty, Hashem feels more responsible, as it were, and rushes to help us like a mother helping her infant. And thus the Torah warns in Parashat Mishpatim that if we oppress widows or orphans, and they cry out to Hashem in distress, He will hear their cries and defend them. Of course, Hashem hears the cries and prayers of all people. But, as the work Ki Atah Imadi explains (based on Rabbenu Bahya’s commentary to this verse), widows and orphans feel helpless. They have no one on whom to rely, no husband or father to care for them, and thus they pray with a keen awareness of their absolute dependence on the Almighty. And thus the Torah describes the widow or orphan’s prayer with the phrase צעק יצעק אלי . They pray אלי , directly to Hashem, recognizing their helplessness and how desperately they need G-d’s help. And thus Hashem feels a greater responsibility toward them, so-to-speak, and guarantees to come to their defense against their oppressors. Each and every one of us can have this same feeling, at all times, by recognizing how great and powerful Hashem is, and how small and helpless we all are in comparison to Him. A woman wrote me a letter describing how her family was facing a grave financial situation. They owed large sums of money, and the pressure was causing a great deal of stress to everyone in the family. Several months ago, they started listening to classes on emunah , and were especially affected by one particular class. That class spoke about how the raven, a cruel bird, does not feed its young, and so Hashem, in His boundless compassion, cares for the young ravens. The more we feel dependent on Hashem, they learned in this class, the more help we will receive. This insight gave them encouragement, and they internalized the message of feeling dependent on G-d’s mercy. They spoke about this concept with their children at the Shabbat table, and during the next week they received a letter from the IRS informing them that they were owed a large refund from five years ago. The refund was enough to cover all the family’s debt. We need to strengthen our belief that we are כגמל עלי אמו , entirely helpless and dependent on G-d’s grace. A man told me the other day that he recently received a call from the buyer for a company with which he had been doing nearly half his business. The buyer explained that he had gotten into a conflict with his the company and had to resign. The man felt very anxious. He had a close, longstanding relationship with this buyer, and his livelihood depended upon the business he did with that company. For the next couple of days, he was unable to function due to his anxiety. His partner insisted that there was no reason to worry. “Stop worrying,” he said. “The buyer is not in charge of our parnasah ; it is Hashem.” “I know,” the man replied, “but I still can’t stop worrying.” He decided to lock himself in his office and listen to emunah classes so he could get the encouragement he needed. He sat there for a full hour, from 4pm until 5pm, until he felt more relaxed. He then went to pray Minhah , recognizing that Hashem is the only one with any say, and that he is helpless without Hashem. When he returned to his desk, he saw an email from the new buyer of the company, saying that he was looking forward to continue doing business with him as in the past. That was it – the problem was solved. The key to success is knowing that Hashem is the only one who could help us, and that we and all other people are helpless without Him.

The Best Advice

﻿ Rabbenu Bachya in Parashat Beshalach writes in the name of Rabbenu Chananel that Emunah can be broken down into four parts- believing in Hashem, believing in the words of our prophets, believing in the coming of the Mashiach, and believing in the next world. The real reward for the Mitzvot will be paid there in the World to Come. In this world, there are a lot of questions, so many things that we cannot understand without the belief that there is another world, and that this world is just a stepping stone to get there. Chazal explain in the Pasuk in Tehilim: “לולי האמנתי בטוב השם בארץ החיים” then “קמו בי עדי שקר ויפח חמס”- King David said, “If I didn’t believe in the rewards of the next world, then seeing a righteous person suffering here would have shaken me(Malbim).” But we cannot not be shaken, because we know that there is so much more than meets the eye- so much that we are not able to understand now. We would love to have the best of both worlds. If a person were to recognize all of his blessings, he would see that he does have this world, too. Here, however, is not the real enjoyment. The main pleasure is reserved for there. A man who was going through tough times once went to the Chafetz Chaim for Chizuk, and he asked the Rabbi, “Please pray to Hashem that I should receive the reward of one of my Mitzvot in this world to improve my situation.” The Chafetz Chaim responded by saying, “That would be a terrible deal for you.” He explained with a parable of a king who went swimming one day unattended in a lake. Something happened, and the king started to drown. A peasant farmer who lived by the lake saw what was happening. He jumped in and saved the king’s life. He did not know that it was the king. He brought the person to his house, gave him a change of clothing, gave him food, and he warmed him up by the fireplace. Before he left, the king thanked the man profusely. He then took a special document out of his bag, wrote something on it, and told the farmer, “Here is a present. Bring it to the bank.” The farmer went for the first time in his life to the big city bank. He stood on line, and watched as the other customers presented documents, and received money. He was excited for his turn. When he was called he handed the teller his document, and immediately there was a meeting of a few bankers analyzing the document. Soon after, the manager came out and told the farmer, “We can’t give you cash for this document here.” “What?” He said. “This is the king’s stationary! How can you not honor it?” He started to make a commotion. The manager calmed him down, and said, “No, you don’t understand. This entire bank does not have enough money to give you even one-tenth of what is written here. You will have to travel to our main branch in a different city. There, in the vault, they have enough to give you the full amount.” Although the manager was standing there well-dressed, in a nice suit and tie, while the farmer looked disheveled, the manager would have traded places with that farmer in a second. He was carrying a personal note from the king. The Midrash says in Vayikra Rabba that every Mitzva that we do creates a special document signed by Hashem, as it were. There is not enough blessings in this entire world to give us even one-tenth of its worth. In the end, the man took the Chizuk from the Chafetz Chaim, and left happily. The Gemara says in Masechet Baba Metzia that Rabba Bar Abahu once met up with Eliahu HaNavi. He asked Eliyahu HaNavi a question. Eliyahu then rebuked him for not knowing the answer. So he told Eliyahu, “I’m sorry that I couldn’t learn as much as I would have wanted to because of my financial trouble.” Then, Elyahu took him up to Gan Eden, and he said, “You are worried about money? Here, gather some of these old leaves from the ground, and put them in your cloak.” As they were leaving, a heavenly voice said, “Raba is taking from his reward in the next world.” So the Rabbi quickly shook out all of the leaves, and he left. When they came back down, the Rabbi realized that his cloak absorbed the fragrance of those leaves. The smell was so appealing that he sold the cloak for twelve thousand silver coins. The Rabbi did not want to benefit from the money, so he gave it away. The Torat Chaim pointed out- look at what Gan Eden is worth. From just the smell of some withered leaves, the Rabbi got twelve thousand silver coins. Imagine what the smell of fresh leaves would have been worth, and that is just for a leaf! Imagine what an actual fruit from Gan Eden is worth. Of course, there is no real eating there, it is just for us to understand- but the rewards there are unimaginable. The tests of this world can be difficult. People feel like they are giving up a lot of enjoyment here by keeping the Mitzvot. In truth, however, this world is just child’s play compared to the real reward. The stronger a person’s Emunah in the World to Come , the greater will be his performance of the Mitzvot.

Just the Smell of a Leaf

When the Jewish people finally left Egypt, the Pasuk says,"ויהי בעצם היום הזה"-It was on that very day. Rashi explains: "כיוון שהגיע הקץ לא עכבן המקום כהרף עין" -Once the time had come for them to leave, Hashem didn't delay for even one second. Hashem had appeared to Avraham 430 years earlier, on the 15th day of Nisan, to inform him that his children would be slaves in a foreign land, and then He would redeem them. Exactly 430 years later, to the second, on the 15th day of Nisan, the time Hashem said they would leave, they left in a hurry. Sometimes we must experience troubling situations for our own good. But when Hashem decides that the time has come for the trouble to end, He takes us out of it in an instant. Yosef Hatzadik was in prison for twelve long years, with no hope of ever leaving. But then, "ויהי מקץ שנתיים ימים", Hashem decided that his time had come. "ויריצוהו מן הבור"-he was rushed out of jail. The next thing he knew, he was appointed ruler over Egypt. The Seforno comments there: "זה כדרך כל תשועות ה' שנעשית כמו רגע"-This is the way Hashem always performs salvations-suddenly, in an instant. The Jewish people left Egypt בחיפזון-in a hurry. There wasn't even enough time for their dough to rise. So too, it will be in the future redemption. The Pasuk says: "ופתאום יבוא להיכלו"-The Mashiach will come suddenly. Just like that, this very long and hard exile will end. This is how Hashem works. Rav Yerucham Levovitz writes that when it comes to man trying to bring a salvation, such as trying to free someone from jail, there are so many processes that must be done until it finally happens. Even if the authorities give their word that he will be released, it could take months or years until it actually happens. Not so when it comes to Hashem. He cuts through all the processes and brings the Yeshua כהרף עין-in the blink of an eye. Someone may have a child "off the Derech" or a child with no feeling for religion. The parent prays to Hashem to give the child Chizuk, but nothing seems to be happening. It could all change in an instant. It does not have to be a long gradual process. Don't Despair. If someone has been looking for employment for so long and can't find anything suitable, Don't Despair. The salvation could come suddenly, when least expected. When it comes to Shiduchim, there are a lot of older singles who have had a very rough time. There are so many obstacles and so much pain. The way it's going, it doesn't seem like it will ever end. We don't know why it has to be that way. But the moment Hashem decides the time has come for that person to be married, it will happen so quickly. The person will find a Shiduch and be happily married. I know of a woman who was in her early thirties, the only one in her class not married. It seemed that there were no more options for her. One day, a man from out of town showed up, became affiliated with the local Shul and became very attached to religion. The Shiduch was suggested and shortly afterwards they were married. Within four years they had three children, and the past was forgotten so quickly. This is ישועת ה' כהרף עין. Everyone has their own issues that they are going through. We do not understand why it has to be like this, but no matter how bleak it looks, Never Despair of salvation. It could always come in the blink of an eye.

No Red Tape

There is a famous saying, "כל עכבה לטובה"-every delay is for the best. If a flight is cancelled, a party is postponed or a doctor changed an appointment, it is all from Hashem for a great reason. We naturally dislike being held back from our regularly scheduled plans. But, if instead of complaining or becoming angry when it happens, we accept with Emunah that Hashem was behind it, we could turn those times into a great service of Hashem. Most of the time we don't see the benefit of cancelled plans or delays. But sometimes, even years later, we realize why we had to be at a certain place at a certain time, and how the canceled plans were Hashem's way of arranging it. Whether we see it or not, Hashem is the מכין מצעדי גבר-He is always guiding our steps, perfectly setting up tailor-made situations for each person's journey through life. I read a story in the book Emunah Shelema that one of the Yeshivot in Yerushalayim decided late in the week to give its students an "Off Shabbat," in which the boys go home. One boy, Moshe, could not go home that weekend because his parents were away. So, he asked his parents for permission to go with a friend to Tsfat for Shabbat. They agreed, and Moshe and his friend took an early bus on Friday morning to ensure that they would have enough time to get there before Shabbat. But that day, there was a large funeral and traffic was at a standstill. The boys started getting nervous. At one point, they realized there was no way they would make it to their destination before Shabbat, and they began regretting the whole trip. Moshe said, "I can't believe we had an off Shabbat the one week my parents were away. Now we're stuck with no place to go." Eventually, the traffic eased up, and with thirty minutes before Shabbat, the bus made a stop in Tveria. The boys decided to get off and ask at the first home they find if they could leave their bags there, and continue to shul with the hope that someone would invite them for Shabbat. They saw a home with candles lit in the window and knocked on the door. A man dressed for Shabbat opened the door and gave them the warmest greeting. They explained their situation, and the man said, "We would be honored if you would stay by us. We have plenty of room. Please come in. Get ready for Shabbat, and we'll leave together for Shul in fifteen minutes." That night, at the meal, the man told the boys the following: The previous week, he and his wife had been in the Ukraine. They were supposed to have been back for Shabbat, but something came up, and they had to stay longer. They weren't prepared to stay for Shabbat, so someone from that community invited them and treated them royally. He said that it was the most amazing Hachnasat Orchim he ever saw. They were so inspired that they said they also wanted to have guests and treat them like that. They knew it would be hard, because, Baruch Hashem, they had a very large family; every room was occupied with several children. Nevertheless, they were prepared to do whatever was necessary. They didn't return from the Ukraine until that day. They weren't even sure if they would make it home before Shabbat, so they told their children to remain with their grandparents in Yerushalayim. The man continued, "Baruch Hashem, we arrived home a few hours ago. My wife had time to prepare, and for the first time in years we have an empty house available to have guests. Then, you two knocked at our door. It was perfect timing!" The boys enjoyed a beautiful Shabbat there. The host was so impressed with Moshe that he suggested him as a Shiduch for his own daughter. Baruch Hashem, Moshe became his son-in-law. Hashem was working behind the scenes to bring that Shiduch to fruition. He orchestrated having the "Off Shabbat" on the one Shabbat Moshe's parents were away, having him arrive at that specific house in Tveria, giving Chizuk to the couple the week before to want to have guests and so much more. "כל עכבה לטובה"-every delay is for the best, whether we realize it or not. Hashem is always guiding our steps and putting us in the places we need to be.

Delays

The Pasuk says in Tehilim: " והבוטח בה' חסד יסובבנו "-which is normally interpreted to mean that if a person has Bitachon in Hashem, then Hashem will reward him by surrounding him with kindness. But, it could also mean that if someone trusts in Hashem and lives with Hashem, he will always feel the kindness of Hashem, no matter what is happening in his life. There are many things that can disturb a person's happiness. People find themselves in different places and situations; they are scared about what the future holds. We have a lot of needs: Health, money, children and Shalom Bayit. We beg Hashem for mercy to help us with those needs. We sometimes feel that if we don't get what we want, we can't be happy. But there is one thing that if we had more of, we would never get depressed or complain. That one thing is Bitachon in Hashem. Besides for asking Hashem for all our needs, we need to ask Him to help us have more Bitachon in Him. If we would have that, we'd have everything. Rabbi Lugassi gave a parable of a son begging his father for help. He said, "Dad, please, I'm cold outside. I need a coat; I need shoes; I need money." The father responded, "My son, why are you staying outside? Come in the house and live with me. Then you won't be missing anything." We ask Hashem, "Please give me this, give me that." But we can all enter the house of Hashem, as it were, and live with Him. Then we would realize that we don't need as much as we thought we did. We could be happy even now, when we don't have what we want. Rabbi Avraham Ya'akov, known as the Sadigura Rebbe, was renowned for his wisdom and witty speech. He was a Torah Giant who influenced hundreds of thousands of Jews in his lifetime. He was constantly surrounded by students and lived like a king in a palatial home in Sadigura. He was also the rabbi of an enormous synagogue and was admired by the greatest rabbis of his generation. But at one point in his life, in the mid 1800's, he was incarcerated for fifteen months, in a damp, cold cell in Russia, with little to eat. On one occasion, his father in law, the great Rav Aharon of Karlin, came to visit him in jail. He asked him how he was doing, and Rabbi Avraham responded, " מה לי הכא, ומה לי התם -What's the difference where I am, as long as I'm doing the will of Hashem, everything is great. I'm where Hashem wants me to be right now." For someone who was accustomed to royalty to make that statement in such conditions means that he lived with Hashem. The rabbi understood that we are in this world to do what Hashem wants us to do, not what we want to do. As long as we are accomplishing that, life is great. What does Hashem want from us? To do His will the best we can in the exact situation he puts us in. If that means being in jail, the rabbi said, "Let it be." If it means having less money, that's also fine. If that's what we're here for, then we're never missing anything, because Hashem is always giving us exactly what we need to do our jobs. David Hamelech said, " ואני קרבת אלוקים לי טוב "-For me, as long as I am close to Hashem, everything is always good.

What's the Difference?

In this week’s parasha, Yitro , we read the Aseret HaDibrot – the Ten Commandments. The last one is לא תחמוד – we are not allowed to covet what our friends have. There are many details as to how a person could violate that mitzvah, but without a question the root of the transgression stems from jealousy. Hashem wants us to have emunah that what we have is meant for us and is best for us, and what others have is meant for them. The mitzvot are for our benefit. Someone who lives life the way Hashem wants us to live will always be happy no matter what he has. When we realize we are not entitled to anything, everything we have is a gift and more than we deserve, we’ll enjoy it so much more. There are so many people who are unhappy because of their high expectations, wondering why others have and they don’t. They are only hurting themselves. It is up to us to decide if we want happiness or the opposite. Rabbi Zamir Cohen gave a mashal to explain. One man, Joe, has everything he needs but, by the end of the month, his bank account is usually negative a few hundred dollars. Then, when he gets his paycheck, he covers it and uses the rest for the following month. And this pattern continues. Another man, Ralph, owns two homes, one is a summer home with a big pool, and he has a million dollars in the bank in savings. Both of these men come home one night to their respective families. Joe is overjoyed while Ralph is depressed. How could that be? That day, Ralph had a meeting with an old friend of his who is a billionaire. He owns 200 stores. He flew in for a business meeting on his private jet which he bought for 25 million dollars. He owns palatial homes in four different countries. Ralph is sitting at the dinner table now but he can’t eat. His wife asks him, “What’s wrong?” He told her about his friend the billionaire and said, “All I can think about is that he has a billion dollars while I only have a million. I’ve been trying all day to figure out how I will ever make that kind of money and I realized it is never going to happen.” Ralph lost his appetite and had trouble falling asleep for the next few months from that. Joe, on the other hand, walked into his home the same night with the greatest excitement. “I just finished paying off a loan. Now we are going to have a few hundred extra dollars per month. The whole way home I’m thinking about what are we going to do with this extra money? I decided we’re going to enjoy it together.” Ralph may have more money than Joe but Joe’s quality of life is so much better because he appreciates what he has. Being happy with what Hashem gives us rather than being jealous will give us pleasure, both in this world and the Next. Rabbi Cohen told a story that is written up on the tombstone of the woman who it happened to. A girl, 14 years old – lo alenu – was in a terrible car accident and went into a coma as a result. She sustained a major injury to the brain and was expected to live whatever years she had left in a vegetable state. Shockingly, she lived in the hospital in that condition for decades until she finally passed away at the age of 90. She was buried by the hospital in a non-Jewish cemetery. Seven years later, a relative of hers became a ba'alat teshuva and realized that her relative was buried in a non-Jewish cemetery and wanted to help her and move her. She flew from Israel where she lived to America and paid the cemetery to be able to move her. When they dug up her body, they were stunned to see that it was still fresh and whole as if she had just passed away. When this became publicized, people asked Rav Chaim Kanievsky how it was possible. She didn’t have that many mitzvot. In what merit was her body preserved? The Rabbi said that it’s simple. The pasuk says in Mishleh, " ורקב עצמות קנאה " – which Chazal explain in Masechet Shabbat to mean - jealousy is what causes the body to decompose. This woman was not able to be jealous, and so her body stayed whole. Imagine if someone is able to be jealous but overcomes it. Imagine a person who works on himself to the point where he is actually happy when others are successful. We all have the ability to be this way, to be from those who always wish good upon others, who want others to be happy. This attitude will bring us joy in this world and the Next. Shabbat Shalom.

Parashat Yitro: Decide if You Want Happiness

A yeshiva in Israel once rented a bus to go on an excursion. Whoever wanted a seat on the bus had to pay in advance and was given a ticket with his exact seat number on it. On the day of the trip, a boy boarded the bus and saw that there was someone else sitting in his seat, the one that he had paid for. He then discovered that this other person did not pay for a seat at all. He started walking over to the one in charge to tell him to remove the boy from his seat, and one of the rabbis saw what was happening. He told this boy, “ Vatranut , giving in on your rights, is a very virtuous mida .” The boy said, “But rabbi, I paid and he didn’t.” The rabbi replied, “ Vatranut is not when you’re 99% right and the other party is 1% right; it’s when you are 100% right and you still give in.” Although we hear many stories about the great segula of being mevater , it’s never enough, because we always need chizuk in this area, being that it’s so hard to give in, especially in the heat of the moment. A rabbi told me there were once two boys in his yeshiva that were arguing with each other all the time. It bothered the rabbi a great deal and it was having a negative effect on the yeshiva. One day, he called a meeting with these boys and taught them the unbelievable segula of giving in and making peace. He told them, “Give in to each other and make shalom and then you could ask Hashem for whatever you want.” The boys were moved by the rabbi’s plea, and they agreed to make peace. About five weeks later, one of the boys came back to the rabbi to thank him. He said Hashem answered the tefila that he made that day. He said he has a 30 year old brother who is not married, and he asked Hashem to bring him his shidduch . The very next day the shidduch was suggested and now, 5 weeks later, they were going to celebrate the engagement. The following year, the rabbi made a brit milah for his first son in the yeshiva. The other boy came to him at the milah and said, “Hashem answered my tefila .” He explained saying, “The rabbi had four girls and expressed his desire to have a boy. I prayed to Hashem that day for the rabbi to have a boy and, baruch Hashem, here we are celebrating the brit milah .” The rabbi went on to say that was the only boy he ended up having. The power of vatranut is amazing. Rabbi Elimelech Biderman told a story about one of his own students which took place just a few weeks ago. The man and his wife rented a hall to make a sheva berachot on lel Shabbat. They came on Friday to set it up and they saw the place was set up already for a different sheva berachot. The wife told her husband, “Let’s just be mevater without telling anyone anything and leave now. Being mevater always gains.” The husband agreed and they found a different shul who let them use a room there for their sheva berachot and they quickly set it up. The woman said later, her father was going in for a surgery to remove a cancerous growth that week. When they opened him up to remove it, they saw that it was gone. The husband told Rabbi Biderman, he remembered a similar story that Rabbi Biderman told just a couple of weeks before that gave him the chizuk to be mevater himself and now he experienced the exact same yeshua . And then he added, “In your story, rabbi, the people were already fighting and then one party gave in. In my story, we gave in before the fight even started. You see from here the segula of being mevater works even if there never is a confrontation.” It is absolutely true that being mevater always gains. We don’t always get to see the immediate benefits of it, but we can rest assured that Hashem appreciates every effort we put in when being mevater and He will reward it at the proper time.

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Daily Emunah Podcast - Daily Emunah By Rabbi David Ashear

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