Wherein the fellas reconnect to air out their New York grievances and ponder their futures in a city of perpetual grindset. Emilio teases his Snake Oil review before recounting his French pharmacy trip to cop five tubes of A313 while Evan loses it over rising rent prices. The boys round off the episode by diving into the logistics and consequences of Dr. Shahab Moubian’s height-lengthening surgery — a $75,000 operation that stretches short kings’ limbs up to 5.6 inches using magnetic nails.

Dewy Dudes

55. Short King Surgery

This week, the fellas chat with comedian, writer, “fishfluencer” and entrepreneuse Caroline Goldfarb aka @OfficialSeanPenn. Caroline kicks off the episode by dropping her K-beauty-heavy skincare lineup, heaping the praises of baby botox and describing how oo35mm cured what her dermatologist couldn’t. She then walks the dudes through her recent entrepreneurial venture into seafood in co-founding Fishwife, a sustainable tinned fish company, and extolling its products’ health benefits. The gang also ponders bro-tox, exiting the internet, the state of late-night television, the miseries of Chicago, the performance logistics of dermal dick fillers, and locating the “banjo string” on your bf’s hog. Follow Caroline and checkout Fishwife: https://www.instagram.com/porkchop.biz https://www.instagram.com/officialseanpenn https://eatfishwife.com/ And for more Dewy Dudes, subscribe to the patreon: www.patreon.com/dewydudes

54. Fishwifery with Caroline Goldfarb

Hot off their Into the Gloss #ITGTopShelfie interview, the fellas revisit the burgeoning male skincare category to discover its, uhhh, unlikely newcomers. From cunnilingus refuser DJ Khaled to the smooth brains who named their brand “Layer” backwards (Reyal), the boys unpack the silicone valley skincare sickos looking to cash in on a segment that definitely, maybe, probably doesn’t exist. The dudes also get into the resurgence of Whole Milk, the Hot Girl discourse it spurred, and what it could mean for your skin. Unlock more Boys Chats at patreon.com/dewydudes

53. Reyaling Lines with the Boys

The fellas visit comedian and writer Kareem Rahma and his Russian-imported Sphynx cat, Kremlin, to learn how to slow the fuck down and revel in the inconveniences of New York life. In this two-part, vibes-heavy ep, the gang goes off on bidets and asshole upkeep; C*r*l*ne C*ll*w*y's Sn*ke O*l; pedicures; preventative testosterone; Bitcoin market psychology; abstaining from monetizing hobbies; identifying with the men of Sex and the City; and much, much more. UNLOCK all of Part B by subscribing to our Patreon at: www.patreon.com/dewydudes

48. Bidet Warriors With Kareem Rahma [Part B] [PREVIEW]

This week, the fellas welcome actor, comedian, writer and multi-hyphenate Paige Elkington to the pod. The boys take a back seat in Part A as Paige runs them through all her sworn non-invasive skincare treatments, hammering home the wonders of microneedling with stem cells, while sharing her Augustinus Bader-inclusive routine. The gang also discusses Paige’s creative writing process and upcoming projects, the anti-sunscreen movement, new-age wellness, celebrities’ bathing habits, washing “soles & holes,” crypto, The White Lotus, getting headlocked by Jeff Goldblum, and being meme’d three times in a lifetime. Unlock Part B of this episode at http://patreon.com/dewydudes Follow Paige on Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/myfriendpaige

52. Holes & Soles with Paige Elkington [Part A]

The fellas chat with influencer, model and podcaster Noor Elkhaldi about the wonders of Augustinus Bader, epsom-salt recoveries, the proper way to gua sha, stream-of-consciousness podcasts, identity, community and much, much more. Noor also gets into catcalling, her “emo queen” mother, Xanga-era posting and being real online. Unlock Part B of this episode at patreon.com/dewydudes Follow Noor on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/noore Listen to Arab-American Psycho: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/arab-american-psycho/id1452118650?mt=2

51. Maneuvering the Gua Sha with Noor Elkhaldi [Part A]

The fellas celebrate their 50th episode by welcoming writer, artist and stylist Jo Rosenthal to the show to drop her god-tier skincare routine and share wellness tips that throw out almost every diet rule the boys have ever followed — suggestions that could potentially cure Hot Girls™ of their IBS and cancel your man’s favorite seltzer. The gang also goes in on online bullying, self hate, getting involved in the zine community, NYC’s flagrant nepotism, and the perpetual NYC apartment hunt, all before Jo fucks up the fellas by dropping the show’s must unconventional dude of the week. Follow Jo on instagram: https://www.instagram.com/justjorosenthal/ Subscribe to the Patreon at patreon.com/dewydudes

50. PUFAs and Loofahs with Jo Rosenthal

Hot off of hosting a banger at Le Bain, techno DJ and friend of the pod Deep Cleansing comes on the show to chat with the fellas about executing some of their favorite pre and post-function dewy do’s and don’ts. In this two-part episode, the gang does a temperature check on the pandemic party scene in New York before diving into executing a successful Irish exit, examining where your anger is coming from, fast casual facials, The Scary of Sixty First, OnlyFans, things that would a kill Victorian child, and much, much more. Unlock Part B of this episode at patreon.com/dewydudes Follow Deep Cleansing on social: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/deep___cleansing/ SoundCloud: https://soundcloud.com/deepcleansing

49. At The Function with Deep Cleansing [Part A]

The fellas visit comedian and writer Kareem Rahma and his Russian-imported Sphynx cat, Kremlin, to learn how to slow the fuck down and revel in the inconveniences of New York life. In this two-part, vibes-heavy ep, the gang goes off on bidets and asshole upkeep; C*r*l*ne C*ll*w*y's Sn*ke O*l; pedicures; preventative testosterone; Bitcoin market psychology; abstaining from monetizing hobbies; identifying with the men of Sex and the City; and much, much more. UNLOCK Part B by subscribing to our Patreon at: www.patreon.com/dewydudes

48. Bidet Warriors with Kareem Rahma [Part A]

The fellas are officially posting FACE and FEET for all the skincare sickos who want to see the boys appropriate chatroulette aesthetics and steal cam girl valor. Watch Emilio and Evan work through their camera shyness to serve you up a review of their recent facial visits, how to keep up with a skincare routine when you don’t have access to water for a week, Joe Rogan’s uncancellable status, Lil Nas X’s performance at the BET awards, Macklemore, and Bryan Nox’s enlightening “four ways to tell if a man loves you” vid. The fellas round off their first cam show with the dewy do’s and dont’s and tease upcoming surprises for the little pay piggies. Subscribe to the Patreon: www.patreon.com/dewydudes

47. Admin Reveal (Boys Chat) [Preview]

The fellas welcome artist, writer, programmer and Glossier Body Hero Sophie Helf, aka @Jil_Slander, a god-tier poster, to defend her use of Thayer’s Witch Hazel Toner while talking writing for the love of the process, modeling for Glossier, the beginnings of her novel, Twitter, and much more. Follow Sophie: https://twitter.com/jil_slander

46. Top Shelf with Sophie Helf

Evan takes a break from exorcising his re-opening FOMO to update the listeners on his PR packaged-packed skincare routine, which includes: a full review of Bejbi Skin’s line of products, lathering up with Lord Jones’ Smooth CBD Serum, a gassed up review of Kiehl’s Creamy Eye Treatment with avocado and the beginnings of his tret journey. Emilio glosses over this week’s new cursed celebrity skincare launch before the fellas dive into Twitter’s latest culture war surrounding the so-called “decline of intimate male friendships.” Rounding off the ep, the boys dish out their dudes of the week, the charming New Brunswick boys and Fit Gawd Lucas Hedges, before signing off with Emilio’s Dewy Do’s and Dont’s centered around his crypto woes. The fellas also discuss a potential tote + tret giveaway for the loyal ass listeners. Details coming soon. Listen to the second half of this episode by subscribing by becoming a patron at Patreon.com/DewyDudes

45. Intimate Male Friendships (Boys Chat) [Preview]

The fellas secure a busted-ass mic just in time to record with one of podcasting’s tallest and most seasoned players, Jason Stewart aka @themjeans — co-host of the “bi-coastal elite” show How Long Gone — while on his NYC check in. Learn from the man who taught Zac Efron how to DJ as he sits down with the boys for an educational session in which the podcasting big dog drops his Avène-inclusive skincare regimen while shelling out advice for universe building in entertainment and branding. Listen to Emilio and Evan mine Jason for intel on intermittent fasting, the Equinox steam room, GOSHI loofahs, nailing your second act and ignoring the haters. Despite what the title may suggest, this episode has absolutely nothing to do with Sunday Riley’s cult-favorite product. It has everything to do with Jason’s age-defying genetic makeup. Listen to How Long Gone at: https://howlonggone.com Follow Jason on Instagram and Twitter: https://www.instagram.com/themjeans/ https://twitter.com/themjeans?s=20

44. Good Genes with Them Jeans (aka Jason Stewart)

After conducting a thorough maintenance check on the “NYC-to-CDMX influencer colonist pipeline,” the fellas can accurately report that the channel is SECURE and FLOWING. Catch up with the boys as they return from a little R&R in Mexico City with 14 tubes of unprescribed Tretinoína and lingering mezcal-induced hangovers. Emilio recounts his reddening, tear-jerking extractions from his luxury facial while Evan goes off on the puzzling cost disparities in both NYC and CDMX. Listen to the boys get in over their heads about Jack Atonoff, the latest edition of the “Shitty Media Men” list, and the ongoing NYC mayoral election, as they unbox PR packages from Kiehl’s, Beijbi Skin, Dieux, and Lord Jones. Subscribe to the Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/dewydudes

43. Boys Chat: Trekking for Tret [Part A]

Wherein the fellas dish out hot takes on cold topics with the most referenced friend of the pod and skintellectual mutual, Cara Schacter, aka the show’s very own girl next door (she really does live next door). Recorded just a few weeks back, the gang finally does its dew diligence by addressing some of the lingering controversy shaking up the skincare world as it relates to SPF, the FDA and God via KraveBeauty. In the eternal quest to figure out how to be hot on the internet, the fellas grill Cara with their now reoccurring bit of asking guests’ thoughts on the act of Boys posting face on main. Readings mentioned in this ep: https://arabellesicardi.substack.com/p/on-god-and-conscious-capitalism Follow Cara on IG: https://www.instagram.com/cjbs/?hl=en

42. Boys Chat featuring the Girl Next Door

Fellas in sheet masks chatting skincare routines, meme culture and beauty news and tips with the world's online beauty elite. Get in touch: dewydudes@gmail.com

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Dewy Dudes

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