"When we set children against one another in contests from spelling bees to awards assemblies to science fairs, that are really contests, from dodgeball to honor rolls to prizes for the best painting or the most books read - we teach them to confuse excellence with winning, as if the only way to do something well is to outdo others. We encourage them to measure their own value in terms of how many people they've been which is not exactly a path to mental health. We invite them to see their peers not as potential friends or collaborators but as obstacles to their own success. Finally we leave children to regard whatever they are doing as a means to an end: the point isn't to paint or read or design a science experiment, but win. The act of painting reading or designing is there by devalued in the child’s mind." Alfie Kohn, The Myth of the Spoiled Child

Every Coach Needs A Coach

106- Alfie Kohn -confusing excellence with winning - See one, do one, teach one

"I saw a monkey reach into the river, take out a fish and put it in a tree. 'What are you doing? I asked the monkey. 'I'm saving him from drowning' he replied.  Remember that our athletes are like the fish and the monkey. Each is going to thrive and excel in certain environments, and those environments might change on a daily basis. Learn about your athletes and how they feel appreciated, loved, encouraged and discouraged. It will help you help them. 

105 - Anthony de Mello - The Monkey and The Fish - See one, do one, teach one

Coach Todd Wolfson is the varsity boy's basketball coach at St. Francis High School in La Cañada, California. Today we took some time to talk about why he coaches, the importance of trusting everyone in your program, doing things differently from others around you, and the importance of patience and understanding that we don't need to win the championship in the first 2-3 days of the season. Coach Wolfson can be reached via twitter at @SFHSHoops (https://twitter.com/SFHShoops?ref_src=twsrc%5Egoogle%7Ctwcamp%5Eserp%7Ctwgr%5Eauthor)

104 - Do Things Differently - Todd Wolfson, St. Francis Boy’s Basketball

My dad likes to day 'you can't be anyone other than who you are'. Often we hear people asking us or our athletes "oh are you going to be the next Michael Jordan?" and while that's fine to have role models and people to look up to, I think it's important to encourage our athletes (and ourselves) to be the best version of YOU. Not the second best version of Michael Jordan.  LeBron James embodies this beautifully in this 15 second clip here  https://www.espn.com/watch/player/_/id/25317911 

103 - You can't be anyone other than who you are - See one, do one, teach one

In the Apple TV series Ted Lasso, there’s a great line about how every disadvantage has its own advantage. My challenge to you is to pretend like you’re a novice at coaching your support and attack it with the enthusiasm that you would if you were just starting out

102- Ted Lasso, every disadvantage has it’s advantage - See one, do one, teach one

Will you pull a kid out of the game for making a mistake or two or three? I’ve started to change my philosophy on taking kids out of games for mistakes. I pay more attention to what happens immediately after the mistake and the mistake itself, because I believe that that has a greater impact on our team than the mistake itself does. I try to practice mistake recovery in practice like I would any other skill, and try to model it for our kids. I challenge you to look at your own philosophy and practice mistake recovery like you would any other skill in your sport.

101 - PGC Mistake recovery - See one, do one, teach one

Once upon a time a prince was cursed by a witch. He was given a frog to eat, and he wouldn’t live to see the next day unless he ate the frog. Every morning after, a frog appeared on his doorstep, and he would have to eat it before the end of the day if he wanted to live to see tomorrow. At first he waited until the last possible minute to eat the frog, and he dreaded his entire day knowing that he was going to have to eat it at 11:59 that night. When he ran into the witch again, she suggested that he start to eat the frog first thing in the morning. So the next day he tried it, And he did not dread his entire day. The end. What is your frog? My challenge to you is to eat it at the beginning of the day. Get the tough stuff done and let it help you get better.

100- Eat your frog - See one, do one, teach one...Story time Friday

In the book “transformational leadership” by Joshua Medcalf and Jamie Gilbert, chapter 29 is titled “start equipping. Stop enabling”. Josh tells a story of training a soccer player and using a tool to increase his effort very specifically and very effectively.

99- Joshua Medcalf & Jamie Gilbert - Start equipping, stop enabling - See one, do one, teach one

In his book tha coach’s guide to teaching, Doug Lemov references giving feedback towards actions, not towards people. This plays in important role in how our athletes perceive us giving them feedback, and also building up our culture and how we want our organization to behave.

98- Doug Lemov- “Actions, not people” See one, do one, teach one

On an episode of the hardwood hustle podcast, Tony Bennett released some advice that his dad gave to him when recruiting his athletes and coaching staff. His advice is to find the people that you can lose with, and in our jobs as developing athletes and people, it’s important that our kids know how important losing is and what it can do for us in the long run.

97- Tony Bennett - “find the people you can lose with” See one, do one, teach one

“The willingness to experiment with change may be the single most essential ingredient to success at anything” - Pat Summit. John Gordon’s book “the coffee bean” gives the notion that challenging situations can change us, or we can use the challenging situation to change our situation and ourselves. I challenge everyone to get in front of the changes happening in your life, embrace it, and use it to improve your situation.

96- Pt Summit’s essential ingredient to success at anything - See one, do one, teach one

“Well done is better than well said “ -Benjamin Franklin

95- well done is better than well said- See one, do one, teach one

I want to provide environment for my teams, where they know that I’ll take the good parts, and the bad parts, the wins and the losses, the parts they’re proud of and the parts they’re not so proud of. I want our cultures and environments to be accepting, loving, and understanding, so that I can challenge them when I need to.

94- all of you is welcome here - See one, do one, teach one

An old donkey fell down a well on the farm. The farmer could choose to spend a lot of money and get the donkey out of the well, or bury him, and close off the well at the same time. He decided on the latter. When the donkey got hit with piles of dirt, he shook them off and stepped up onto them. He used his adversity to propel him forward and get himself out of a tough situation.

93 - shake it off and step up - See one, do one, teach one

When you pause a drill in practice, how long do you talk for? Time yourself next time and see if you can keep it under 30 seconds.  Doug lemon talks about 'aligned feedback' in his book the Coaches' Guide to Teaching, and it means that 'our words matter'. and you're going to hold your players accountable to the thing you paused the drill for. And ONLY that thing! This is hard to do, because we have to let a lot of other things go, but it's impactful and helps our players learn better.

92- Your Words Matter - See one, do one, teach one

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Every Coach Needs A Coach

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