In which the M-Plate Saga continues; Jay gets into the spirit of the day; we briefly give up on our primary mission; the story is coordinated if not coherent; Miles is not allowed to continuity-shame about Tolkein; Gaia is extra chill; Dirt Nap discovers altruism; and Jubilee should absolutely not have eaten that.

Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

410 – Jubilee, Don’t Eat That

In which nobody is sure what Emplate actually eats; airport food is not a good peace offering; Larry Hama writes a good Jubilee; the St. Croix siblings merge; and we honestly have no idea what a token is.

409 – Lurid Malarkey

In which Bishop gets another miniseries; splinter timelines make fun narrative sandboxes; the X.S.E. goes detecting; the Statue of Liberty never fares well in dystopian futures; “Booger” is not a name you give yourself; and we can’t believe it’s taken us this long to make a hanky code joke about Bishop.

408 – Yabba Yabba Yabba

This would usually be a skip week, but thanks to some generous donors to Equality Florida, Hawk Talk is back! This week: independent comics! X-PLAINED What makes a comic independent Superbutch Little Garden 44 Presidents and a Letter to a Cat Finder Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (again) Elfquest Nexus Prince of Persia Love & Rockets Jim Ottaviani's science comics Wet Moon

HAWK TALK – Independent Comics

In which X-Factor bounces from one rock-bottom to another; Sabretooth gets his (murderous) groove back; Dark Beast embraces the iMac aesthetic; the tip was righteous; Mystique multitasks like a pro; and Shard Bishop has come unstuck in time.

407 – Freshening Up

In which we disagree about the value of Stan Lee intros; everybody wants Wolverine; Mister Sinister lurks; Haley Blanding deserves better; Thunderbird fights a tiger; and Xavier and Magneto do their usual thing.

406 – The Most Dangerous Mini-Game

In which Jay returns; babies are bad at pretty much everything; continuity flies straight out the window; Cable should speak English with a Scottish accent; Harry Leland knows how to dress; Tanya Trask makes the same time travel mistake everyone makes; and we love Al Kennedy forever.

405 – Morally Purple

And now for something completely different. (Death's Head II #1) In which Death's Head gets around universes; AIM fails to recognize closed narrative loops; we need more huscarls in comics; time travel occasionally solves the problems it creates; and we bid a fond farewell (for now) to Al Kennedy. X-PLAINED: Death's Head Death's Head II #1-4 Marvel UK Death's Head I Minion Earth-8410 The far future of 2020 Dr. Evelyn Necker How to dress for time travel Reed Richards's mother's name Earth-12892 Robin Hood of Future Past Heavily armed nuns Tuck Spratt The Lord High Protector Huscarls Baron Strucker V Charnel A large number of deaths A deft solution to a complex problem Essential Marvel UK Marvel UK vs. Marvel US NEXT WEEK: Go outside and touch some grass! NEXT EPISODE: The return of Jay! Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog! Find us on iTunes or Stitcher! Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here! Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

404 – Marvel UK, Yes?

Did the Astral Plane used to be this cramped? (Kitty Pryde: Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. #3) In which Shadowcat gets a new miniseries; people don't talk that way (but probably should); holograms are magic; the Helicarrier gets possessed; Wolverine fights a computer; and Miles and Al pitch live-action X-series. X-PLAINED: Possession Shadowcat (Kitty Pryde) (more) (again) Kitty Pryde: Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. #1-3 A surprising helicopter Frictionless bed sheets S.H.I.E.L.D. vs. S.H.I.E.L.D. vs. S.H.I.E.L.D. The word "obstreperous" The nefarious doings of nasty transom peekers, envelope steamers, and door kickers Larry Hama dialogue Rigby Fallon Yet another return of Ogūn One way to get from the Brooklyn Bridge to a Helicarrier Yet another fight on the astral plane Wolverine vs. technology The intrinsic power of life, I guess Visibility of psychic powers Live-action X pitches NEXT EPISODE: Death's Head II! Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog! Find us on iTunes or Stitcher! Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here! Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

403 – Sneaky-Peeky Stuff

Captain Mustache, Part the Second. (Excalibur #115) In which Marvel UK was a wild ride; everyone has a definitive Kitty Pryde; Sari St. Hubbins studies her X-Men; Moira MacTaggert discovers contagion theory; ideas do not stories make; Meggan is the heart of the team; and Excalibur inches towards its finale. X-PLAINED: Marvel UK Digitek Excalibur #114-117 What Excalibur's been up to Tunnels vs. sewers An unexpected callback Slang The mutability of Kitty Pryde Friendship Sari St. Hubbins Fashion One way to get around a power inhibitor A frosted tips outline Viruses Phalanx love Greebling A substantial retcon Excalibur vs. the Sidri Marvel characters' musical associations Whether there have been more X-Men or Avengers NEXT EPISODE: Kitty Pryde goes to work for The Man Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog! Find us on iTunes or Stitcher! Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here! Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

402 – What the Damn?!

And now for something completely different. (Generation X Holiday Special #1) In which Santa Claus makes problematic choices; we make good on a promise; Sebastian is the new Deadpool; Skrulls get stuck as animals more than you’d think; Nanny and Orphan-Maker celebrate; and Jubilee stops worrying and learns to love Christmas. X-PLAINED Santa Claus’s flirtations with villainy A new direction for Generation X Larry Hama Al vs. U.S. geography Generation X #32-33 Generation X Holiday Special New Mutants #92 Thing One & Thing Two St. Croix The Circus of Crime The Pirates of Dark Water (somewhat) Hacker T. Dog Why Wolfsbane is scared of clowns Skrull Kill Crew Carnie Voltron Chief Authier Phat beats A reality biscuit Emplate’s pocket dimension Chimera and Dirtnap Variant interiors Nanny & Orphan-Maker (more) (again) Santa Claus (in general) Benefits of inconsistent characterization NEXT WEEK: Break week NEXT EPISODE: Excalibur! Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog! Find us on iTunes or Stitcher! Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here! Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

401 – True Tales of Double-Entry Bookkeeping

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line! In which legacy numbering is best left alone; all roads lead to the Antarctic; we finally learn Gambit’s big secret; Erik the Red gets yet a third identity; no one soils the Juggernaut; Maggott saves the day; and we have somehow made (technically more than) 400 of these things. X-PLAINED Spat The tragic loss of the Cyber Comics How not to back up your work Uncanny X-Men #350 X-Men #70 A shambles What’s been happening since Operation Zero Tolerance A very fancy cover Insufficient outerwear Senses Justice as a decorating theme Baffling statuary The return of Erik the Red Erik the Red (again) Ferris Gambit’s big secret A large number of continuity errors A total dick move De-icing Untitled Marrow Game A big fight Living room surgery Legal documents Favorite anniversary issues Dangling plot threads NEXT EPISODE: Generation X vs. Christmas Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog! Find us on iTunes or Stitcher! Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here! Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

400 – Loud Noises

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line! In which the X-Force road trip era begins; Team X takes on a new dimension; Dani Moonstar gets her subtext back; pointing out a stereotype doesn’t excuse using it; Tabitha Smith generally deserves better; platypuses are underrepresented in the superhero genre; Hell becomes Stryfe; and Domino gets back in the game. X-PLAINED A dastardly plot X-Men 2099 Road trips X-Force #71-74 Team X A Love & Rockets reference Stan and Ollie The Triplets of Belleville How not to fund your film Michael Whitecloud Project Stepladder Colossal Man Several references to X-Force -1 Platypuses Edwin Martynec Weaponized humming The death of Warpath Hell Blackheart Friendship A mysterious villain NOTE: Whoa, The Cybertronic Spree is actually a real band! NEXT WEEK: The return of Erik the Red! Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog! Find us on iTunes or Stitcher! Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here! Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

399 – The Cybertronic Spree

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line! In which the rest of the X-Men return from space; Maggott is the new cool; Gambit's past catches up with him; Chris Bachalo takes over as regular artist on Uncanny X-Men; Deathbird flirts singularly aggressively; Eany and Meany eat a truck; dating a telepathic ninja is going to take some getting used to; and Havok predictably remains ABD. X-PLAINED Motormouth (Harley Davis) Motormouth and Killpower Uncanny X-Men #347-349 Grovel and Spat A horse guy who is actually a cat-frog-lizard guy An extraordinarily half-assed action figure Load-bearing backstory Landscape The other Nanny Elegant foreshadowing Beast's appearance as a mutant power Gambit's chest hair The end of playtime CCA-compliant foliage Deathbird and Bishop A vanity plate Eany and Meany One-off psychometry Psylocke vs. Maggott Decompression Havok's enduring lack of a Ph.D. NEXT EPISODE: X-Force hits the road! NOTE: In this episode, Miles theorized Grovel's voice as sounding halfway between Cable and Kermit the Frog without realizing that he was in fact just describing Sweetums. -Jay Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog! Find us on iTunes or Stitcher! Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here! Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

398 – Shanna the Wee Devil

Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line! In which Al Kennedy and Miles enter a somewhat post-OZT world, the art of Frank Teran (whose uncle built a jetpack) elevates an otherwise merely decent story, Puck is played by Bob Hoskins, Wild Child gets a chance to shine, Mystique and Forge are sitting in a tree, and Swamp Thing is amazing. X-PLAINED: Spider-Man's head cold Sabretooth: Back to Nature #1 Sabretooth (Victor Creed) Wild Child (Kyle Gibney) Horrible violence, expertly implied The ubiquity of sewers Saturday morning cartoons of R-rated movies Serial killers with G.I. Joe names Improbable tracking Bilingual crime Chekhov's waterfall DRUGS X-Factor #136-137 The Hound program Skeumorphism Doctor Valerie Cooper and Major Edmond Atkinson, excellent exes Questionable wound-dressing Holograms Government jobs The sad fate of the Chase family Nimrod disambiguation The Marvel Universe According to Doctor Seuss NEXT EPISODE: The X-Men return from space! Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog! Find us on iTunes or Stitcher! Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here! Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

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Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men

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