Four years ago, on February 14 (yes, Valentine's Day) of 2018, Neil and I shared our story with the world about how our marriage had survived addiction, and specifically Neil’s lifelong battle with pornography addiction. This decision wasn't made lightly, and it was something he ultimately had to decide he was willing and ready to do. Today we're reflecting back on that decision and talking through how we decided it was the right thing to do, and how it ties into the 12th step of any 12-step program. If you've ever wondered why we chose to share such a personal thing, this should answer a lot of your questions. And if you've ever felt God nudging you to openly share a struggle or something deeply personal that may help another, but you're afraid and not sure if it's the right thing, hopefully this episode will help bring some clarity to what's right for you, and IF it's the right thing, understanding how it will help others.   This week’s episode is also brought to you by Hello Fresh. Go to hellofresh.com/mintarrow16 and use code mintarrow16 for up to 16 free meals and three free gifts!   Time Stamps: [01:11] - What is anonymity? How does this create a safe space in a recovery meeting? [04:09] - The 12th step in the 12-step program is to embody the principles and carry those lessons out into the world. [05:41] - Neil says that he was initially very sensitive about others possibly knowing of the pornography addiction. [08:20] - Did anyone in Neil’s family know about the addiction? Neil talks about who he gradually opened up to. [10:52] - Hearing how people are impacted by other stories inspired Corrine and Neil to share their own story. [13:47] - When Corrine and Neil first started talking about breaking anonymity, Neil was hesitant. [15:48] - Neil shares his feelings and thought process of how to decide if he should tell his story or not.  [17:58] - There are different levels of the 12th step. Not everyone needs to break anonymity if they don’t feel called to do that. [19:50] - Listen to Neil touch on the vulnerabilities of talking about addiction as a personal story. [22:47] - Neil says that this moment gave him the push to finally want to share his addiction journey. [25:34] - Corrine gives her perspective of the same moment. How did it impact Corrine? [28:26] - When Corrine and Neil published a blog post to finally share their journey, what initial response did they receive? [30:50] - Neil talks about transparency and social media. He says he chose to show their reality. [33:15] - How do Corrine and Neil feel when people mention the addiction journey to them in-person? [36:47] - Neil focuses on being a whole person and embracing his journey. [39:46] - Does Neil ever feel pressured to avoid a relapse? Neil talks about living in the solution, not being naive towards his recovery, and putting himself first. [41:51] - Corrine reiterated that breaking anonymity can happen on different levels. She gives examples of how people approach their own vulnerabilities. [43:48] - Whatever someone else thinks of you is none of your business. [45:45] - Nothing is beyond repair for God. [47:11] - Corrine offers her realization of sharing the journey. Does sharing personal stories serve a larger purpose than we imagine? [50:01] - Neil gives his final thoughts on what sharing his story meant to him.   Supporting Resources: Blog post on Mint Arrow about our journey to find recovery from pornography addiction Blog post on Mint Arrow about recovery resources and what to do when you or someone you love struggles with addiction  Find an ARP meeting near you

Mint Arrow Messages

Why We Told Everyone

My friend Lacy Gadegaard West likes to say, 'I'm a stylist by trade and a CEO by accident'. She's the Founder and CEO of Laced Hair Extensions, a globally recognized, multi-million dollar company. Born and raised in a small town in Southern Utah, Lacy began her professional career as a stylist in Las Vegas. She developed her love for hair extensions and perfected her methods while working at the Bellagio and Aria for almost a decade. Lacy traveled the country doing hair for A-List celebrities and high-end clients. With her experience at high end salons and clients that included celebrities and musicians, Lacy founded Laced Hair Extensions in 2010. In 2015, Lacy began to experience health challenges, including a series of events in which her face became paralyzed, her speech slurred, and she suffered from crippling headaches, all of which led her to lose an unhealthy amount of weight. After countless tests, MRIs, and medical opinions, Lacy was diagnosed with a brain tumor and Multiple Sclerosis. Inspired by her time in the hospital with women suffering from hair loss due to medical treatments, Lacy wanted to do more. Lacy soon founded The Laced Hair Foundation, a purpose-driven non-profit dedicated to donating hair extensions to suffering women and giving hope when it’s needed most. Today I get to talk to Lacy about her story behind starting the Laced Hair Foundation, and what it's like to live with MS. She also shares with me some of the ways you can get involved and volunteer your time or resources to the Laced Hair Foundation, and details on a fundraising gala she's hosting this week in Utah! For all the people out there who are already raving fans of Lacy's beautiful hair extensions, I think you'll really enjoy this inspirational story that will make you love her hair even more.   This week’s episode is brought to you by Lumineux. Go to getlumineux.com/mintarrow and enter code mintarrow to get 15% off your first order of certified non-toxic, plant and mineral based, teeth whitening products. This week’s episode is also brought to you by Hello Fresh. Go to hellofresh.com/mintarrow16 and use code mintarrow16 for up to 16 free meals and three free gifts!   Time Stamps: [02:04] - Where did Lacy Gadegaard get the motivation to start her own brand? [04:12] - Lacy explains why the story of her journey is more meaningful than her successful results. [06:08] - Lacy recalls the symptoms she experienced before a brain tumor diagnosis. [08:13] - Why did hair clip-ins help Lacy during her treatments?  [10:50] - Lacy says she found her calling while speaking with fellow treatment patients. [12:58] - Lacy talks about connecting with Bob Harmon over support for MS and getting her initiative together to officially help women. [15:30] - You can turn any lemon into lemonade, no matter how sour they start off. [17:32] - The quality of life for MS is better than years ago thanks to organizations and individuals working towards a better future. [19:05] - What is “a day in the life” of someone managing MS? What are the sensations? [21:55] - Lacy talks about pregnancy during MS. Why is it important for her to listen to her body? [24:01] - Stress is a common thread to hair loss in women’s lives. [26:28] - Lacy talks about the gala she is hosting soon that focuses on restoring confidence in women dealing with hair loss. [29:02] - What will be going on at the event? [30:32] - People can look fine, but have to manage “invisible” diseases or health concerns they deal with every day.  [33:28] - If you are part of someone’s support system, here are a few ideas of how to show up for them. [35:35] - What are Lacy’s goals for Laced Hair Extensions? [37:52] - Hairstylists are collaborating with Lacy to help women feel beautiful. [40:25] - Where can you go to engage with the Laced Hair Extensions initiative? [42:29] - We all have our struggles, and it can get better.   Supporting Resources: Laced Hair Foundation lacedhairfoundation.org  Laced Hair Extensions https://lacedhair.com/  Instagram @lacedhairfoundation Personal Instagram @lacygadegaard

Living with MS and Giving Back with Lacy of Laced Hair

How many times have you been asked, “What do you do?” Or “What does your dad do?” or “What does your husband do?” Aside from the possible conversation about how we could be better at not just assuming automatically that the men make all the money (we'll save that one for another day), I always cringe a little at this question because it of course implies, “What do you do for work?” or “How do you make money?” What I'd love to change in our society is the idea that what we do (or how we make money) is the pinnacle of what defines us. What you do is so much more than how money comes into your bank account, right? Today Neil and I are talking about his journey with this - the idea that what you do for work defines you. We're sharing his story of losing his job in a career he loved, to moving into a job that humbled him to the core, and how that led to him truly defining what his purpose is in this life.   This week’s episode is brought to you by Lumineux. Go to getlumineux.com/mintarrow and enter code mintarrow to get 15% off your first order of certified non-toxic, plant and mineral based, teeth whitening products.   Time Stamps: [01:00] - Corrine explores the relationship between “what you do” and identity. [02:41] - Neil is someone who once loved his work and talking about his work. Why did he love talking about it? [05:25] - People usually pull a lot of assumptions when they hear what you do. [06:50] - Neil shares how his view of his work shifted after the family moved to Southern California. [08:30] - Corrine and Neil explain why moving to Southern California brought up more challenges than they imagined. [10:29] - When you already feel that you’re sinking, it can be hard to get out of that mode. [12:12] - What is Neil’s reflection on his work performance at that time? [14:53] - Neil recalls when he faced an inevitable truth about his addiction. [16:34] - What is Corrine’s understanding of that moment from the perspective of a spouse? [18:48] - Neil explains when he was finally let go from his job. [20:41] - What did Neil and Corrine think as it seemed many things were falling apart? [23:05] - Neil and Corrine share how they got the idea to help promote essential oil to make some money. [25:31] - What actually happened that made the entrepreneurial side of Neil and Corrine grow? [27:42] - Neil discusses the drastic flip that came when talking about what he does during his new work. [30:12] - Corrine and Neil joke about what Neil would rather do during that time in life.  [33:02] - In times of unexpected change, that period can be a moment of transformation to a higher level of ourselves. [34:57] - Validation from God vs. False Identity [37:12] - There are times where transformation will take us through pain that we don’t quite understand yet. [39:25] - Neil says what he learned about work and identity helped him find a lesson in his recovery. [42:17] - Transformation can take you to new opportunities to show gifts that you did not get to reveal before. [44:46] - Figure out your life’s purpose; it’ll be one of the best moments in the marathon of your life. [46:40] - Corrine and Neil reflect on the work-life balance and family time. [49:18] - What is the measure of your life? [52:07] - Corrine explores what she sees as things that are part of who she is and how she shows up in the world. [54:56] - Being here is about love and service. [57:09] - Love yourself and understand who you are.   Supporting Resources: “Wild at Heart: Discovering the Secret of a Man’s Soul” Book by John Eldredge “Mere Christianity” Book by C.S. Lewis  “How Will You Measure Your Life?” Book by Clayton M. Christensen

What Do You Do?

Carlos Whittaker’s wife Heather Whittaker is often asked, “So what does your husband do?” And this question plagued her for a long time until one day she finally identified it perfectly: “He's a hope dealer.” Carlos Whittaker identifies himself as an author, speaker, moment maker, spider killer and hope dealer. He's amassed a following of over 240,000 Instagram followers who he lovingly refers to as his Instafamilia, where they've raised almost a million dollars in under a year for good causes and for bringing humanity back together. Carlos and I talk today about kindness, understanding, walking with your neighbor instead of fighting with them on issues where you disagree, and some of the life lessons he has learned that he believes in and teaches wherever he goes. Buckle up because you're about to be dealt some hope.   Time Stamps: [00:59] - Carlos Whittaker tells the story of doing a good deed to show someone they are appreciated. [03:44] - What happens when you ask a bunch of people to help with a good deed? Carlos shares how strangers came together to give more than a $60k tip. [06:21] - Carlos recalls how his blog slowly showed him an opportunity to a new life. [08:29] - How did Carlos test out his speaking skills? [11:00] - When something is placed on your heart, and you follow it, have patience and believe. [12:33] - What are Carlos’ thoughts on strong convictions, empathy, and having hard conversations? [14:26] - Don’t stand on issues. Walk together. [15:58] - Carlos gives an example of him and a friend walking together to develop more empathy about seemingly opposing standpoints. [17:48] - Listen to Carlos give advice on having hard discussions with loved ones. [19:38] - How does Carlos deal with managing relationships when people have differing opinions? [21:33] - Carlos gives his perspective of “comparative suffering”. Is it actually useful? [23:20] - What’s the difference between sympathy and empathy? [25:24] - This moment showed Carlos yet another time that people can come together for good. Only this time, he was the recipient. [28:00] - How did Carlos pay-it-forward? [30:42] - Hope is the currency of humanity. [32:45] - Where does Carlos get his hope? [34:17] - When one solution to your problem is not working, where do you find another solution? [36:45] - Carlos explains the meaning behind the cobwebs and spider analogy.   Supporting Resources: Carlos’ Instagram @loswhit  Carlos’ Website

Carlos Whittaker on Hope and Humanity

Lindsay Bird Nielsen of the Lindsay Report is a longtime friend of mine who has battled with Lyme disease for most of her life, even before she knew what it was. She has also suffered the loss of both her parents and is married to France Nielsen who also lost both of his parents. Lindsay is someone I look to on how to deal with grief myself, and I learned so much about empathy and compassion for those who have Lyme disease by following her Instagram and listening to her stories of what that challenge is really like. So today, I’m walking with Lindsay through her story of Lyme and what has helped her over the years to understand this disease and take back control of her life despite this ongoing challenge. She also shares with me some of her insights on grief, loss, and how to help others struggling after any kind of loss, and what we can do to really understand and love others who are struggling with any of life’s challenges.   Time Stamps: [01:00] - Lindsay Nielsen gives a snapshot of her life and how that led to her becoming known on social media. [03:27] - Social media became Lindsay’s outlet of expression and also a way to advocate for Lyme disease. [05:06] - Lindsay talks about the cycle she goes through with pregnancy and managing her health. [07:23] - How does Lindsay feel about doing her best to manage her health? [09:10] - What prayer did Lindsay say in a low health moment that shifted life for her? [11:58] - This is the moment Lindsay actually found out she had Lyme disease and set her on a personal mission. [13:53] - Why is Lyme disease difficult to diagnose? [16:26] - Lindsay shares a story from the time she had a strong reaction to a treatment. [18:02] - What is the pyramid-like ripple effect caused by the damage of Lyme disease? How can people try to check for Lyme disease? [20:57] - Lindsay shares her perspective on what helps people who deal with Lyme disease. She emphasizes trusting your instincts about your care providers. [22:27] - Lindsay gives her tips on managing inflammation, the power of sleep, and optimizing your living space for better health. [24:47] - How can people assist or support anyone managing Lyme disease? [26:52] - Lindsay talks about the importance of the support system about her and gets candid about the dynamics in her network of relationships. [29:27] - Lindsay and Corrine discuss loss in life and things unfolding the way they are meant to.  [32:27] - Listen to Lindsay recall the last moments of talking with her dad. She gives her view of grief. [33:58] - What words from Lindsay’s dad deeply impacted her? [35:52] - Lindsay says that it’s okay to allow yourself to feel loneliness in grief. How does she deal with these feelings? [38:06] - This small habit of Lindsay’s mom still lingers with Lindsay.  [40:33] - What role does faith and acknowledgement play in the way Lindsay manages grief? [42:14] - Lindsay encourages people to reflect on what they “want” when dealing with grief one day at a time. [44:13] - Everything about grief can be fragile, so give yourself grace. [46:05] - Advocate for yourself and be relentless in finding the answers to give you the life that you want to live. [48:32] - Life is good.   Supporting Resources: Lindsay’s Instagram @thelindsayreport

Living with Lyme with Lindsay Nielsen

Do you know the actual definition of the word priority? I didn't, until I read a book a few years back that taught me! Today we're breaking down what it really means to set a priority and how we make clear priorities in our lives. We share how to make priorities in business, in family, in personal progress, and in every aspect of your life in order to accomplish the things that really matter most.   Time Stamps: [00:30] - Do you know the true meaning of the word “priority”? [02:57] - Corrine explores the possible misconception of what is considered a priority. [04:34] - You can choose the number one priority that rises above all other things. [07:19] - Knowing the priority helps guide decision-making and alignment. [09:05] - Each area of life can have its own top priority.  [11:53] - Everyone has their own mapping that they use to guide their life and having a shared priority can create common ground. [13:21] - Neil explores the importance behind the idea of priority in spirituality. [15:22] - You can choose some aspects of your life to improve. [17:29] - Corrine and Neil discuss moving family and work around the main priority in life. [20:32] - How can you protect your plans and what you choose as your priority? [22:48] - Corrine and Neil talk about priority balanced by relationships. [24:50] - Are you intentional enough to notice when there’s a crossroad challenging your sense of priority? [27:39] - Keep the “first things” first. [29:32] - Here is Corrine’s method for figuring out the top priority. PART 1. [31:12] - Here is Corrine’s method for figuring out the top priority. PART 2. [33:44] - Listen to Neil’s method for figuring out the top priority. [35:23] - Corrine shares her thoughts on how having a top priority makes everything else work. [37:57] - Corrine and Neil express their takeaways of priority, faith, and spirituality.   Supporting Resources: “Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less” Book by Greg McKeown “Make Time for the Lord” Talk by Russell M. Nelson “Three Choices” Talk by Joseph B. Wirthlin “For Him” Talk by Joy D. Jones

What Does PRIORITY Really Mean? And How to Determine Yours.

Sharon McMahon is a former high school government and law teacher who earned a reputation as ‘America’s Government Teacher’ amidst the historic 2020 election proceedings for her viral efforts on Instagram to educate the general public on political misinformation. Through a simple mission to share non-partisan information about democracy, Sharon has amassed hundreds of thousands of followers online, affectionately called the “Governerds", who look to her for truth and logic in a society plagued by bias and conspiracy. I had the absolute pleasure and privilege of hanging out with Sharon for an hour virtually, and today I'm sharing all the wisdom and insight that she shared with me, with you! I personally found Sharon during the height of political unrest in 2020, and she was more than a breath of fresh air for me. I've learned so much from her just by following her on Instagram, and whether you're already a governerd or just hearing about her for the first time today, I guarantee you're about to learn a ton from this episode, too.   Time Stamps: [01:08] - Sharon McMahon helps the public understand government and politics.  [02:50] - Where did Sharon’s passion for politics and current events come from? [05:26] - Sharon says she decided to make non-partisan videos for educating people instead of engaging with internet arguments.  [08:04] - Which news outlets does Sharon look to for information? [11:03] - Corrine and Sharon talk about recognizing polarity and how to help youth develop discernment.  [13:22] - Sharon gives a dinner analogy of exercising critical thinking. [15:59] - Which public figures would Sharon have lunch with?  [17:44] - Sharon shares her thoughts on flexible thinking, rigid thinking, and distress tolerance. [19:26] - What is the answer to extreme polarization?  [21:46] - Most things in life are not zero-sum games, including what we agree and disagree on. [24:31] - Sharon explains her projects of raising money for teacher grants. [26:23] - Sharon discusses the teaching profession and the lack of support that can be experienced in some communities. [28:02] - Teachers are going above and beyond to provide basic and core necessities for children. [30:52] - How did Sharon raise over half a million dollars for Christmas? [33:05] - The principle of giving is important. Intent outweighs the size of the gift. [35:12] - Sharon points out this lesson in US History to keep in mind, since history repeats itself. Why do seemingly harmless moments become the greatest scars? [36:37] - Sharon continues her thoughts on dehumanization. She explains the crossover of thoughts, actions, and mindsets used to justify how we think. [38:44] - Corrine talks about the relation of repeated polarizing experiences globally as she recalls a museum visit during a trip to Rwanda. [40:36] - Sharon says it’s important not to step toward dehumanization. She explains why situations that appear sudden are unconsciously developed. [42:53] - Sharon urges people to not give up hope in doing their part to make the world a little better.   Supporting Resources: Sharon Says So Instagram @sharonsaysso  Sharon’s blog  Sharon Says So Podcast

Being Civil, Informed and Making the World Better with Sharon McMahon

The word hope is sometimes misunderstood. In our everyday language, the word often has a hint of uncertainty. For example, we may say that we hope for a change in the weather or a visit from a friend. In the language of the gospel, however, the word hope is sure, unwavering, and active. Prophets speak of having a “firm hope” (Alma 34:41) and a “lively hope” (1 Peter 1:3). “Happy is he,” said the Psalmist, “that hath the God of Jacob for his help, whose hope is in the Lord his God” (Psalm 146:5). With hope, we can find joy in life. We can “have patience, and bear with ... afflictions, with a firm hope that ye shall one day rest from all your afflictions” (Alma 34:41). These are wise words from a study guide we use called The Bible Dictionary, and I love how it perfectly describes the word and meaning of hope. Today’s podcast is all about step 2 in the 12 steps: hope. We're sharing our personal experiences in finding hope in the midst of addiction in our marriage, and if you're trying to find hope for yourself or someone you love, this is how and where you can find it too.   Time Stamps: [01:09] - Today, we’re talking about the second step in the 12 Steps, which is hope. [02:50] - Neil gives his perspective on why he finds beauty in hope being the second of the 12 steps. [04:39] - Why does it not help to tell someone to “try harder”? [07:05] - Corrine and Neil discuss how some traits can influence a person’s response to possible addiction. [09:04] - Corrine speaks from her perspective as a spouse who needed to change her view of drug addiction. [10:51] - Neil explains the gradual process of carrying new principles, like hope, into life when on a recovery journey. [13:07] - It’s remarkable to see someone’s transformation while on their journey to turn life around. [16:00] - How hard is it to stick to addiction recovery when heavy life situations arise? Neil shares his insight. [17:39] - Corrine recalls relatable stories of people staying strong despite the heavy distractions of life. [20:11] - Sometimes people don’t realize that their story is inspiring to others. [22:24] - Neil talks about humanizing the recovery journey and giving grace while in recovery. [24:07] - Sharing your testimony can strengthen your testimony. [25:39] - Sharing your testimony allows for others to learn from your experience. [27:09] - What are actionable steps you can do to cultivate more hope? [30:02] - Hope is about restoration. [32:52] - What is it that you shall hope for? [35:30] - Have strength, courage, and hope to take one step forward.   Supporting Resources: Scripture on hope in the Book of Mormon-Moroni 7:41 ARP Manual “Addiction Recovery Program: A Guide to Addiction Recovery and Healing” Mark 9:24 “...Lord I believe, help thou my unbelief”

HOPE: Hold On, Pain Ends.

David Butler is a religion teacher, speaker, writer, podcaster, YouTuber and someone who's constantly in my ear teaching me little golden nuggets about the gospel of Jesus Christ! Dave started hosting a YouTube and podcast episode each week with his friend Emily Belle Freeman, where they follow the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints’ scripture study guide called Come Follow Me and tell you what you don't want to miss in the scriptures that week. I got to sit down today and talk all about some of my very favorite topics with David: the Bible, Jesus, the Christmas story, how to connect with the scriptures, and a whole lot more. I'm telling you that this interview just gets better and better so stick around till the end for sure. His insights on the nativity and setting the scene for when Jesus was born were the perfect gift to me this Christmas season and I know it will be for you too.   Time Stamps: [00:56] - You may have heard of David Butler. David gives a short story about his evolution of creating content for connecting with the scripture. [02:48] - What started Don’t Miss This for David and Emily? [04:24] - How does David make scripture more interesting for people who feel disconnected? [07:07] - David says people can train themselves to make scripture reading feel more interactive. [08:44] - Listen to this example of interacting with the scripture as David explores why there are no “bad guys” or “good guys” in the scriptures. [11:30] - Is prophecy a set-up? David talks through the different perspectives of the crucifixion. [14:30] - David shares what the cross symbolizes in his life. [16:26] - David discusses knowing sacrifice and love through scripture. [18:56] - Across religion, people choose different contexts for symbols to help connect to the scripture. [21:51] - David says he is a sentimental type that connects with symbolism. [24:44] - How does David invite people to be more connected? [27:10] - David encourages using examples and evidence instead of trying to use convincing and pressuring tactics. [29:35] - Corrine and David reflect on being more relationship-centered when approaching scripture. [32:27] - Here are David’s suggestions for feeling more connected with the scripture and the scene of nativity. [35:13] - Corrine and David talk about Christmas episodes. [37:11] - David gives context to the scene of nativity in a realistic perspective of the people in the story being human like the rest of us. [39:55] - Corrine brings up memories of what David’s descriptions are making her recall. How does this connect to the “lowest of lows”? [41:49] - You can find God in your story, even in a garbage dump. David explains why. [44:21] - What should people do if they can’t get interested in the Old Testament? Here is David’s advice for reading the Old Testament. [46:03] - David warns that when reading the Old Testament, everyone should assume the best in the context. [49:03] - David gives a bonus tip for reading the Old Testament and encourages everyone to know that their personal story is not over. [52:49] - We are here to be happy and to have joy.   Supporting Resources: Don’t Miss This Study Podcast Don’t Miss This website Don’t Miss This YouTube channel David Butler Instagram Don’t Miss This Instagram The Chosen “Christmas with The Chosen: The Messengers” Video

Getting to Know God with David Butler

Has the day of miracles ceased? This is a question posed in my favorite book, the Book of Mormon by the prophet Mormon himself. We've had a couple of miracles ourselves lately that we're going to share in today’s episode, along with the story behind where this mantra came from in my life. I actually finished recording this episode with Neil and was texting back and forth with my mom about the man I mention in this episode, Lamont Ericson. She sent me this text from his wife Debbie, with some of the even more beautiful details about the miracles and impact of Lamont’s life before he passed that I'd like to share with you. “Lamont was told he’d have 3-6 months to live, and he ended up living 15 months. That was of course a tremendous blessing to us, because our kids were only 6 months and 2 years old at the time of diagnosis. Lamont researched his illness, tried several pharmaceutical studies, and remained hopeful and faithful - I think all those things extended his life. It gave us extra months to spend lots of time together and make many home videos, which are the main source of my children’s memories of him. As a side note, he actually sold his medical practice right after his diagnosis so that he would be free to spend every remaining moment with his family and friends. I have vivid memories of going to the zoo together, and he’d get so tired that he’d lay on the benches to rest between exhibits because he didn’t want to stay home and miss even a minute. As his last act as a physician, he sent a goodbye letter out to all his patients, expressing his love and appreciation for their trust. He told them about his illness and how he was praying for a miracle. He explained, though, that if the miracle didn’t go his way that he’d be forever grateful for what he believes about family and other treasured relationships. He encouraged his patients to set their personal finances in order in their lives and tell their families how loved they are, so that they can be at peace with any eventuality in their lives. Over 14 years later, I still receive correspondence from a few of those patients who tell me how much that letter meant to them. Thanks for the chance you’ve provided me to re-walk through this journey today.”   This week’s episode is brought to you by VidAngel. Skip or mute what you don’t want to see or hear with VidAngel. Go to vidangel.com and enter code MINTARROW at checkout to get your first month for $1. Or text vidangel to (949) 506-2558 and we will text you back with a link that will get you your first month for $1.   Time Stamps: [02:12] - Corrine and Neil share news of their pregnancy journey and talk about the rollercoaster ride of the journey so far. [05:05] - Corrine kept experiencing a sensation of feeling like someone was missing. [08:05] - Corrine and Neil describe what brought them to a conclusion of making room for another child. [11:05] - Why did Corrine need to suddenly go see the doctors? Was there a miscarriage? [13:55] - This call from the doctor confirmed whether or not Corrine was experiencing the miscarriage. [16:40] - Corrine says she felt off about prematurely speeding up the miscarriage. [18:23] - What did Corrine and Neil’s bishop advise? [20:48] - What did a doctor say that could be seen as practical yet discouraging? [23:30] - Corrine talks about starting a product line in alignment with Mint Arrow Messages. [26:53] - Corrine reminisces about a cancer journey story she knew of during her teen years. This was the origin of “Miracles Happen” for her. [28:54] - What did Corrine learn from the man, Lamont, who shined through his cancer journey? What is the definition of a miracle? [31:11] - Neil recalls a story of a similar cancer story he heard in a talk. What miracle happened in that journey?  [33:08] - Neil explains the realization he learned in the talk of the cancer story he heard. [36:03] - Sometimes obvious miracles don’t happen and sometimes they do. Corrine talks about a time the desired miracles did happen. [38:48] - Corrine continues with the story of her pregnancy journey. Is there another miracle on the way? [40:52] - Corrine says she spoke with a friend who also experienced a miscarriage. How did her friend’s words impact her view of what a miscarriage could mean? [43:26] - Why are trials important? Earthly experiences help us develop. [45:52] - Corrine recalls the miracles she saw over the summer in her own family. Who was sick? [48:51] - Neil encourages everyone to hold on in their own journey, despite things not looking the way they expect.   Supporting Resources: “Is There No Balm in Gilead?” Talk by Brent H. Nielsen “Behold I Am a God of Miracles” Talk by Elder Ronald A. Rasband

Miracles Happen

The Midnight Mission is the oldest continuously operating human service organization in the Los Angeles region. Centered in the Skid Row area of downtown Los Angeles, The Midnight runs one of the most efficient direct service operations in the country. With only five executive managers throughout its 100-year history, The Midnight has been a consistent beacon of light for those with nowhere else to turn. This past summer I went with my church youth group to the Midnight Mission where we provided sack lunches for the people in the Midnight Mission program, and that day I met Andrew Linares, who has worked as the volunteer manager at the Midnight Mission since April of 2018. Andrew went through the program from 2015-2017 after living on the streets of Skid Row himself, struggling with a drug and alcohol addiction. Today I get to interview Andrew about his journey to finding recovery and the start of a new life at The Midnight Mission and how that turned into his life's work. Andrew shares with me all of the inspiring programs and work going on at the Midnight Mission where they help thousands of people get off the streets of LA, find food and shelter and water, learn to work and save money and eventually move on to find work and homes for themselves. I couldn't help but think over and over of when Jesus taught us that when we feed the hungry and clothe the naked, it's just as if we were doing it for the Savior himself. I was so inspired by Andrew's story and his perspective and the work he's doing at the Midnight Mission and I can't wait to share the gift he gave to me by sharing this with you too.   Today’s episode is brought to you in part by Troomi Wireless. Get the safe phone that grows with your kids by going to troomi.com and entering in code MINTARROW at checkout for 50% off a Troomi phone. Today’s episode is also brought to you by Away Travel. Explore Away’s full range of all things travel and start your 100 day trial today by going to awaytravel.com/mintarrow.   Time Stamps: [01:35] - Andrew Linares says that joining the work at Midnight Mission was luck. [04:14] - Andrew talks about the drug and alcohol relationship that landed him in the program at Midnight Mission before working there. [05:52] - What simple call changed Andrew’s life? He talks about being shunned by family and friends. [07:53] - What realization did Andrew have after a relapse? [09:43] - Andrew discusses the work program, education program, and interpersonal communication at Midnight Mission. [11:48] - How did Midnight Mission shift Andrew’s perspective of religion? [14:37] - Programs here are meant to empower participants to design a life. [16:56] - Andrew provides insight about what it’s like for people who are living on the streets. He speaks from his experience. [18:54] - Not everyone that lives on the streets starts off as addicts, but they can pick up the tendencies to deal with hardships. [20:58] - Andrew emphasizes the importance of addressing people as the individuals that they are. [23:34] - What is Andrew’s suggestion on giving to the homeless? Should you give people money? [26:20] - Andrew encourages people to donate time through volunteer work if they think they have nothing to give. [29:05] - Andrew talks about three very specific programs that create a special atmosphere at Midnight Mission. [30:53] - Why is 1-on-1 conversation impactful for those in need? [34:11] - How did the Midnight Mission start? Andrew gives the background of the initiative. [36:20] - When did the Midnight Mission incorporate the 12-step philosophy? Andrew gives the background of Midnight Mission. [37:46] - Eventually, Midnight Mission grew a focus towards family and financial independence. [40:25] - Midnight Mission wants their participants to focus on building themselves up.  [41:55] - Here is the lesson Andrew hopes people take away from this episode.   Supporting Resources: Website: www.midnightmission.org Opportunities to support and serve at the Midnight Mission https://www.midnightmission.org/get-involved/   POC: Andrew Linares – Volunteer Manager Email: alinares@midnightmission.org Phone: 213.624.9258 ext. 1249   Instagram  Facebook Twitter TikTok  YouTube

Skid Row Streets to Volunteer Manager: How Andrew Linares Turned his Life Around and is Helping Others Do the Same

A few years ago I stumbled upon a talk called “Gifts of Love” that completely changed the way I think of gift giving during the Christmas season. Today we're sharing some highlights and cliff-notes from that talk and why we feel like it's so powerful and true. We're talking about the calendar system that our family uses to make sure we're keeping Christ in the center of our Christmas each day, by doing very small and simple acts of service. And I'm sharing live with Neil, for the first time this year, the gift that I've tried to give to Jesus, and to my family, by trying to overcome a character weakness of mine and improve personally in this one way to try to become more like Jesus.   Today’s episode is brought to you in part by Troomi Wireless. Get the safe phone that grows with your kids by going to troomi.com and entering in code MINTARROW at checkout for 50% off a Troomi phone.   Time Stamps: [01:26] - Corrine and Neil are excited for the holiday season. What do these special end-of-year holidays mean to them? [03:42] - Let’s talk about how to know if you’re giving a good gift. Corrine references a talk by Henry B. Eyring. [06:08] - Expert givers let their receivers sense that their sacrifice brings them joy. [08:30] - Neil recalls an amazing gift in a time when his family needed a kind gesture. [10:58] - What does it mean to give your time? [12:30] - Here is where you can find small ideas on giving gifts each day. [14:06] - Corrine and Neil talk about sending cheer through giving machines. [16:43] - Make giving easier by following gift ideas that are laid out. [19:10] - How can you make gift giving special for kids without overdoing it? [21:22] - Some parents create unrealistic expectations around gifts for their kids. [24:04] - Corrine reminisces on the car she got as a gift and compares it to the gifts of her friends. [26:54] - Here is how you can involve kids in gift-giving. [29:01] - Corrine gives an example of her own mother using a strategy to get the family to participate in giving. [31:39] - Corrine explains her feelings about giving a gift to Jesus. [33:24] - Corrine shares what her gift to Jesus was this year. She starts with why she struggled to choose a gift. [36:11] - Corrine shares what her gift to Jesus was this year. What clicked that inspired this year’s gift? [38:34] - Neil gives his thoughts after finding out about Corrine’s gift. [40:20] - Corrine talks about the idea that you can give gifts bit by bit as a reflection of the Savior. [42:44] - Neil reminds everyone that the ability to choose is a gift. What does your gift-giving say about your agency? [44:28] - Do one little thing each day when you can.   Supporting Resources: Light the World: Find ways to give and serve on giving Tuesday and in the month of December. Find a giving machine  “Gifts of Love: A Christmas Message” Talk by Henry B. Eyring

How to be a Good Gift-Giver

Angie Balfour is the Chief People Officer at Weave, a Utah company that just went public last week. She has worked in HR really since high school (more on that in a minute) and before becoming an executive at Weave, she worked as the head of Human Resources at Instagram, a Human Resources Business Partner at Facebook, and before that she worked all over the world for a company called Fairchild Semiconductor in all aspects of their HR, talent and leadership management. Today I'm asking Angie some of the questions that she's helped me with the most over the years when it comes to HR, everything from how to hire well to how to manage teams effectively, how to intentionally invite more diversity, and how to treat others well who go through a health crisis. Angie also shares with me what she's learned personally in her pursuit of success in her career, and what she learned from battling two types of cancer 5 years ago. Angie has been one of my dearest friends for years, the type of person who I call with advice and ALWAYS hang up feeling a thousand times better, more empowered and inspired, and I am certain she'll leave you feeling the same way today too.   Today's episode is brought to you by Troomi Wireless. Get the safe phone that grows with your kids. Go to troomi.com and enter code bf50 to get 50% off a Troomi phone.  This week’s episode is also sponsored by Better Help. Join over one million people who have taken charge of their mental health. Go to betterhelp.com/mintarrow and get 10% off your first month of counseling.   Time Stamps: [01:13] - What led Angie Balfour to be interested in HR? Hint: This involves a high school crush, a competition, and an encouraging stranger. [03:52] - Angie says she took on assignments no one wanted to do in the HR space and this helped move her towards an executive role. [06:18] - Angie explains that she originally turned down the opportunity to Facebook. What changed her mind? [09:09] - When she was young, Angie says her parents were very encouraging towards her taking ownership of her life. [11:56] - Angie points out her HR tips for defining the role and reimagining how new hires fit in a business. [14:45] - Why does Angie suggest paying attention to problem solving questions and on-boarding relationships in HR strategies? [16:51] - What is the “new-employee-lense” that businesses can leverage for their operations? [19:11] - Listen to Angie share a moment of learning how to better communicate with her team members. [20:46] - Angie talks about taking feedback and hiring people who are “smarter” than yourself. [22:27] - A good team focuses on identifying the needs together rather than clashing within the team. [24:50] - Listen to Angie speak about how her job responded after she received her cancer diagnosis. [27:14] - When someone is going through something hard, Angie suggests to support that person in the way that works for them. [28:48] - What did Angie learn about vulnerability during her cancer journey? [30:32] - Angie uses her cancer experience to give insight and offer a listening ear to others going through a similar journey. [33:32] - Angie shares what she felt in the moment that Weave went public. [36:30] - What is Angie’s goal for her life and career? [39:01] - Angie talks about her journey to be more fit, and how she is staying excited for the future. [40:48] - Listen to these tips for stepping up diversity strategies. Angie gets candid about the learning process of diversity in business. [43:42] - Angie shares her thoughts on creating supportive atmospheres for diversity. [45:14] - Reflecting on life experiences, Angie discusses the idea of having privilege and opening opportunities for others. [47:14] - Angie says we can all make a difference wherever we are. [49:23] - Angie congratulates Corrine on her work with Mint Arrow Messages so far.   Supporting Resources: Angie Balfour LinkedIn Facebook

Hiring, Managing, Impacting and Achieving with HR Exec. Angie Balfour

If you've ever driven down the 5 freeway in San Diego and seen the huge glowing temple from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and wondered what the heck goes on in there, or you've seen us talk about going to the temple weekly on our stories and wondered why we’re so obsessed with hanging out there, or even if you're a member but are struggling with getting to the temple, today we're talking about all these things. We're first breaking down some of the basics of the temple, and then sharing some personal experiences and blessings we've received in the temple, and why it's so vital for us to keep going.   Today's episode is brought to you by Troomi Wireless. Get the safe phone that grows with your kids. Go to troomi.com and enter code bf50 to get 50% off a Troomi phone.  Today’s episode is also brought to you by Away Travel. Explore Away’s full range of all things travel and start your 100 day trial today by going to awaytravel.com/mintarrow.   Time Stamps: [00:40] - Corrine and Neil explain why they go to the temple and what they do during the visits. [02:41] - Corrine and Neil explain the difference between temples and chapels. Is either open to the public? [05:13] - Being part of the church includes following the Law of Tithing, the Law of Chastity, and the Word of Wisdom. Corrine reassures that no one expects you to follow these perfectly. [08:05] - If you’re not prepared to make the covenants, you can move at your own pace. The important part is that you make an effort to follow the covenants. [11:05] - Before being a member of the church or being of age to enter temples, people can attend a temple open house while the temple is not dedicated. [13:24] - What happens inside the temples? Why do people need to be careful of where they get information about temples? [15:13] - Corrine and Neil explain the origin of baptism and temple marriages. [16:49] - Temple marriages for the eternal family unit can happen before or after a family comes together.  [19:22] - Endowment is where you learn about the creation of the world, blessings, and more. [20:59] - Corrine retells the story of how the Disney World ride “It’s a Small World” reminds her of the promises of the temple. [22:58] - Don’t feel pressured or overwhelmed by learning about the temple and covenants. [25:25] - What is the Celestial room? Corrine expresses why going to the temple was beneficial for her relationship with Neil. [28:41] - What can you do if there’s resistance, whether internal or external, when you try to go to the temple? [31:19] - Corrine and Neil talk about when they first decided to do weekly temple visits.  [33:24] - How did Corrine and Neil keep up with temple visits when real life situations fought for their attention? [34:35] - Being in the temple, so close to heaven, Corrine says she was able to get comfort in those moments. [36:52] - The more you visit the temple, the deeper the connection settles. Neil shares how he was able to simplify his approach to strengthen his spirituality while facing life. [38:31] - Neil says he notices when he does this particular thing life turns out better than he could ever imagine. [41:17] - The promise of happiness is built on agency, but remember that you have a choice. [43:50] - The temple is where you can get the strength to do what you need to do.   Supporting Resources: Current LDS temple open houses Video clips about LDS temples and what goes on inside 1 Corinthians 15:29 “Else what shall they do which are baptized for the dead, if the dead rise not at all? Why are they then baptized for the dead?” Video about our friends Ryan and Natalie going through the temple for the first time “Becoming Exemplary Latter-Day Saints” Talk by Russell M. Nelson on making an appointment (temple appointment) with the Lord and keeping it with exactness and joy.  “Make Time for the Lord” Talk by Russell M. Nelson

All About Temples: What They’re for and Why We Go

A couple months ago, I found myself in Mexico COVERED in bug bites! They were so bad I literally couldn't sleep. So I asked my Instagram besties for advice...like the kind you ask when you're desperate for any solution. And one girl told me to go to the Instagram account Phil's My Pharmacist to look up his bug bite hack. And the next thing I knew, I was mixing up some really random stuff in my hotel bathroom and putting this pink paste all over my body. But it worked!! So I posted a little thank you video to Phil on Instagram, and that was the start of an awesome friendship with Phil's My Pharmacist. Today I sit down with Phil to ask him all about his journey to becoming a pharmacist, why he wanted to do this as a career, and what some of the most rewarding things are about being a pharmacist. He talks to me about mental health, not judging others, how a good pharmacist will present you with over-the-counter options and education and let you decide, and some really solid advice about self-love and acceptance. He also talked to me about the best plan for taking opiates (after a surgery or when absolutely necessary) if you know you're prone to addiction, and how to safe-guard yourself from going into a dangerous situation that could lead to addiction. If you're not already Insta-friends with Phil and he's not your pharmacist yet, he probably will be by the end of this interview.   Today's episode is brought to you by Troomi Wireless. Get the safe phone that grows with your kids. Go to troomi.com and enter code bf50 to get 50% off a Troomi phone.  Time Stamps: [01:20] - Corrine talks about how she became friends with Phil's My Pharmacist. [02:50] - Phil says he originally pursued being a doctor. He says this incident was a sign that he should seek another path. [05:43] - Once Phil switched over to pharmacy school, did he love the programs? [07:45] - Phil values an approach of telling people “what they can do” instead of “what to do”. [10:26] - Being accessible to the community as a pharmacist helps everyone be informed. What are Phil’s thoughts on the generous interactions between pharmacists and community members? [12:25] - Corrine shares a story about the time during her pregnancy where a pharmacist helped her address a bad cold. [14:11] - What are Phil’s thoughts on the usage of essential oils? [15:59] - Phil shares his encouraging thoughts on why people should let go of stigmas surrounding mental health. [17:38] - Corrine opens up as she reflects on her journey of including medicine in her mental health care. [20:04] - Corrine and Phil admire the strength and courage required to take ownership of mental health. [21:48] - Different from a few decades ago, kids of today are exposed to a lot more, which impacts the mental health of youth.  [23:57] - How can we help kids deal with anxiety? Can kids move past anxiety by acknowledging the feeling is there? [26:48] - Accept all feelings, and teach people to deal with the feelings. [28:08] - Connecting a mental health approach to addressing drug addiction is the way that Phil imagines we can “rehumanize” how individuals are treated. [30:56] - Addiction is more connected to escapism than euphoria. [34:11] - Phil breaks down his suggestions for painkiller management for people concerned about possible addiction. [36:34] - What is the backstory that influences painkiller usage and pain tolerance in the medical field? [39:34] - As a community pharmacist, Phil knows a lot of personal information on his community members. Does it ever get awkward with his friends? [42:34] - Did Phil figure out a new remedy for keratosis pilaris?  [45:22] - Phil gives his list of items every household should have in relation to health and medicine. [48:22] - No one can like you more than you like yourself. [49:46] - Keep a look out for Phil's My Pharmacist!   Supporting Resources: Phil’s Pharmacy in Cache Valley Utah  Pharmacist IG  Phils My Pharmacist on YouTube

Phil's My Pharmacist on Mental Health and Self-Acceptance

Mint Arrow Messages is a podcast from blogger and content creator Corrine Stokoe who's best known for her fashion and deal blog Mint Arrow. In Mint Arrow Messages we talk to influencers you know and love about the REAL grit that made them who they are, the hidden stories of struggle, challenge and triumph. We're sharing their stories in hopes to create more awareness, compassion, kindness and understanding in a world that's starving for more goodness.

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Mint Arrow Messages

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