Many people have claimed that the increase in stress, anxiety and depression in kids is due to being forced to wear a mask at school.  That it gets in the way of their learning and affects their academic performance.   This is just NOT TRUE. What we've observed of the many people/parents making these false claims are they simply lack an understanding of and education in mental health, OR people/parents who simply don't want their kids to wear a mask.   The mask appears to have become a symbol of a political stance or a loss of liberties in this country and THAT discord is what is affecting kids, not wearing the mask.   Listen in for more education and information about MASKS, KIDS & MENTAL HEALTH - the real truth and we will lay it out for you from a mental health professionals point of view.  Show you evidence, explain what is more likely creating stress and anxiety and depression in kids, provide you with strategies to help them and talk about how you can advocate in your school district.   Jax Anderson and Renae Swanson are two mental health professionals helping parents decode the tween and teen years.   Jax and Renae have worked with tweens and teens for a combination of 35+ years and their experience and creative parenting solutions have proven valuable for parents around the world.   They aren't afraid to talk about the 'tough stuff', the topics and issues that many mental health professionals steer clear from speaking publicly about when it comes to raising tweens and teens.   Join Jax and Renae as they begin the journey of talking about the topic of raising tweens and teens in the world today.   Contact us with questions, requests or constructive feedback: Jax IG: @psykotherapist TiKToK: @psyko_therapy Email: jax@psykotherapist.com Renae IG: @renae.d.swanson Email: swansonrd@uwosh.edu    

Raise A Little Hell Podcast

Masks, Kids & Mental Health

Jax and Renae discuss the mental health, academic, relationship and social affects on teens during the past year.  Teens are more resilient than adults give them credit for and instead of 'protecting' them from the trauma of this past year; it's imperative we listen to them, validate their feelings and support them in their own growth and development.  In this episode Jax and Renae help you with what to say and what to do to help your teen grow through this past year.     Join Jax and Renae in their facebook group for Moms of Tween/Teen Daughters: https://www.facebook.com/groups/momsandteengirls/?ref=bookmarks Jax Anderson can be found on IG: @thepsykotherapist & TiKToK: @psyko_therapy Join the email list for Raise A Little Hell Podcast here: www.raisealittlehellpodcast.com

Apocademic Traumaversary

In this episode Renae and Jax discuss the aftermath of setting and maintaining boundaries with family and friends.  How this affect you and your kids.  It's important to model for our kids how to set and maintain boundaries but also how to cope with the backlash.    Jax Anderson and Renae Swanson are two mental health professionals helping parents decode the tween and teen years.   Jax and Renae have worked with tweens and teens for a combination of 35+ years and their experience and creative parenting solutions have proven valuable for parents around the world.   They aren't afraid to talk about the 'tough stuff', the topics and issues that many mental health professionals steer clear from speaking publicly about when it comes to raising tweens and teens.   Join Jax and Renae as they begin the journey of talking about the topic of raising tweens and teens in the world today.   Connect with Jax here:  IG: @thepsykotherapist  TiKToK: psyko_therapy Join the email list for Raise A Little Hell Podcast here: www.raisealittlehellpodcast.com

Coping With The Backlash of Setting Boundaries

Jax Anderson and Renae Swanson are two mental health professionals helping parents decode the tween and teen years.   Jax and Renae have worked with tweens and teens for a combination of 35+ years and their experience and creative parenting solutions have proven valuable for parents around the world.   They aren't afraid to talk about the 'tough stuff', the topics and issues that many mental health professionals steer clear from speaking publicly about when it comes to raising tweens and teens.   Join Jax and Renae as they begin the journey of talking about the topic of raising tweens and teens in the world today.   Holiday Guidelines We are following many of the guidelines on this website. Our hope is you are as well. Here is what we are following for our Holiday gatherings. These are important even if you have previously had COVID. They are finding that even though you have antibodies, you can still be exposed and spread the virus. https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/daily-life-coping/holidays.html For the 14 days before the get together please limit your contact with people besides those that you live with. If you know that your housemates or roommates are not safe distancing, please find ways to stay out of contact with them. (E.g., cook and eat at different times at them. Please only use substance with those that you are very close to like significant others. Substances make it hard to safe distance and maintain hygiene. Marijuana has been found to be a spreader when smoking in groups. If you have any symptoms at all, stay home. If you have been exposed to COVID, and are not finished with your 14 day quarantine stay home even if you were sick previously. Again, antibodies do not keep you from spreading.  We would really love to have all of you with us for the holidays and I know that this text message may upset some of you because of the life style change. Please try to follow these guidelines. If you cannot, please be honest so that we are all able to stay safe. If you cannot come, we can use zoom and we can definitely drop food off for you.   Find Jax and Renae on social media by engaging with them in their facebook group for Moms of Tween/Teen Daughters: https://www.facebook.com/groups/womenraisinggirls Jax Anderson can be found on: IG: @thepsykotherapist TiKToK: @psyko_therapy and  Renae Swanson can be found on: IG: @renae.d.swanson and at www.integritycounselingllc.net Join the email list for Raise A Little Hell Podcast here: www.raisealittlehellpodcast.com "Disclaimer: This podcast is informational and NOT a substitute, replacement or in conjunction with individual, family, couples’ and group psychotherapy. If you or someone you know is in need or seeking mental health services please contact your local mental health service provider. For more resources pertaining to mental health please visit https://www.nami.org/"

Holiday's 2020: How To Survive Family Functions

Are you experiencing any of these symptoms?  Shock, denial, or disbelief.  Confusion, difficulty concentrating.  Anger, irritability, mood swings.  Anxiety and fear.  Guilt, shame, self-blame.  Withdrawing from others.  Feeling sad or hopeless.  Feeling disconnected or numb.  If you are, your kids are.  Our behaviors are different now so "Do as I do, not as I say" is our new mantra!  Growth focused!  Resources: https://www.samhsa.gov/find-help/national-helpline Find Jax and Renae on social media by engaging with them in their facebook group for Moms of Tween/Teen Daughters: https://www.facebook.com/groups/womenraisinggirls Jax Anderson can be found on IG: @thepsykotherapist TiKToK: @psyko_therapy and Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jaxandersonlpc/ Renae Swanson can be found on IG: @renae.d.swanson and at www.integritycounselingllc.net Join the email list for Raise A Little Hell Podcast here: www.raisealittlehellpodcast.com "Disclaimer: This podcast is informational and NOT a substitute, replacement or in conjunction with individual, family, couples’ and group psychotherapy. If you or someone you know is in need or seeking mental health services please contact your local mental health service provider. For more resources pertaining to mental health please visit https://www.nami.org/"

Do As I Do, Not As I Say

Jax and Renae discuss how the reality of what our kids are seeing when they watch us and other adults behave our way through 2020.   Self awareness can help us model healthier skills for our children as well as help ourselves navigate this significant trauma we are all experiencing together.   Find Jax and Renae on social media by engaging with them in their facebook group for Moms of Tween/Teen Daughters: https://www.facebook.com/groups/womenraisinggirls Jax Anderson can be found on IG: @thepsykotherapist TiKToK: @psyko_therapy and Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jaxandersonlpc/ Renae Swanson can be found on IG: @renae.d.swanson and at www.integritycounselingllc.net Join the email list for Raise A Little Hell Podcast here: www.raisealittlehellpodcast.com "Disclaimer: This podcast is informational and NOT a substitute, replacement or in conjunction with individual, family, couples’ and group psychotherapy. If you or someone you know is in need or seeking mental health services please contact your local mental health service provider. For more resources pertaining to mental health please visit https://www.nami.org/"

Self Awareness Can Be A B!tch: looking at your parenting through the eyes of your child

In this episode Jax & Renae talk about the little pet peeves they've noticed while parenting through a pandemic.  Maybe you're feeling overwhelmed by your own pet peeves?  Listen to Jax & Renae validate your feelings and pick up some parenting strategies they have been using to cope!    Find Jax and Renae on social media by engaging with them in their facebook group for Moms of Tween/Teen Daughters: https://www.facebook.com/groups/womenraisinggirls Jax Anderson can be found on IG: @thepsykotherapist TiKToK: @psyko_therapy and Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jaxandersonlpc/ Renae Swanson can be found on IG: @renae.d.swanson and at www.integritycounselingllc.net Join the email list for Raise A Little Hell Podcast here: www.raisealittlehellpodcast.com "Disclaimer: This podcast is informational and NOT a substitute, replacement or in conjunction with individual, family, couples’ and group psychotherapy. If you or someone you know is in need or seeking mental health services please contact your local mental health service provider. For more resources pertaining to mental health please visit https://www.nami.org/"

COVID Parent Pet Peeves: I'm Going To Kill 'Em!

Jax and Renae discuss the significant mental and emotional impact 2020 has had on kids and their parents.  They remind listeners of the fragile brain development youth are experiencing and how parents can add to their stress and also share strategies on how parents can help lighten their kid's stress.       Find Jax and Renae on social media by engaging with them in their facebook group for Moms of Tween/Teen Daughters: https://www.facebook.com/groups/womenraisinggirls Jax Anderson can be found on IG: @thepsykotherapist TiKToK: @psyko_therapy and Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jaxandersonlpc/ Renae Swanson can be found on IG: @renae.d.swanson and at www.integritycounselingllc.net Join the email list for Raise A Little Hell Podcast here: www.raisealittlehellpodcast.com "Disclaimer: This podcast is informational and NOT a substitute, replacement or in conjunction with individual, family, couples’ and group psychotherapy. If you or someone you know is in need or seeking mental health services please contact your local mental health service provider. For more resources pertaining to mental health please visit https://www.nami.org/"

Helping Kids Through 2020 Stress & Anxiety

Jax and Renae discuss their reactions to area school district decisions, school options, and the media coverage of COVID-19 related science. Links: https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/community/schools-childcare/reopening-schools.html https://www.cdc.gov/media/releases/2020/p0723-new-resources-tools-schools.html https://coronavirus.jhu.edu/testing/testing-positivity https://www.americanprogress.org/issues/education-k-12/news/2020/07/16/487756/3-principles-reopening-schools-safely-covid-19-pandemic/ https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/community/community-mitigation.html   Find Jax and Renae on social media by engaging with them in their facebook group for Moms of Tween/Teen Daughters: https://www.facebook.com/groups/momsandteengirls/?ref=bookmarks Jax Anderson can be found on: TiKToK: psyko_therapy IG: @thepsykotherapist Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jaxandersonlpc/ Renae Swanson can be found on: IG @renae.d.swanson Join the email list for Raise A Little Hell Podcast here: www.raisealittlehellpodcast.com "Disclaimer: This podcast is informational and NOT a substitute, replacement or in conjunction with individual, family, couples’ and group psychotherapy. If you or someone you know is in need or seeking mental health services please contact your local mental health service provider. For more resources pertaining to mental health please visit https://www.nami.org/"

Re-Opening Schools for 20-21 & The Mental Health Impact

 COVID-19 & Quaranteenagers   We recorded a special episode of Raise A Little Hell Podcast to help you talk to your teen during this pandemic.   Teens are restless and understandably so, they may be driving you crazy by this point and we feel you Mamas.   In this episode we answered some of the common questions we have been getting since COVID-19 has sequestered us to our homes.   Hope you enjoy it, and if you have any questions please let us know in the comments.  We'd love to hear what you think!   You can view the video by joining our Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/momsandteengirls/?ref=share 

Special Episode - COVID-19

Jenny Jamison, APSW joins us for our Part 2 discussion on sex trafficking and your teen - what you need to know.   Jenny Jamison has extensive experience working with victims who have been sex trafficked; and in this episode she shares her valuable knowledge, experience and information.   Have a listen and let us know if you have any questions or additional information by contacting us at one of the links below... Find Jax and Renae on social media by engaging with them in their facebook group for Moms of Tween/Teen Daughters: https://www.facebook.com/groups/momsandteengirls/?ref=bookmarks Jax Anderson can be found on IG @thepsykotherapist and Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jaxandersonlpc/ Renae Swanson can be found on IG @renae.d.swanson and at www.integritycounselingllc.net Join the email list for Raise A Little Hell Podcast here: www.raisealittlehellpodcast.com "Disclaimer: This podcast is informational and NOT a substitute, replacement or in conjunction with individual, family, couples’ and group psychotherapy. If you or someone you know is in need or seeking mental health services please contact your local mental health service provider. For more resources pertaining to mental health please visit https://www.nami.org/"

Sex Trafficking - What You Need To Know Part 2

Season 1, Episode 7 Sex Trafficking - What You Need To Know Part 1 In this episode Renae and Jax answer questions they intend to ask Jenny Jamison in episode 8.  Jenny is an advanced practice social working on her clinical licensure at A Beautiful Journey and Brave Space. One of her previous positions was as a anti-trafficking/sexual exploitation advocate for Winnebago County where she acted on behalf of survivors of sex trafficking/exploitation to increase survivor safety and decrease further victimization by individuals and systems.  Jenny provided emotional support and resources to victims and worked within legal and medical systems to provide court and medical accompaniment for survivors navigating these systems. Additionally, she developed and conducted training and outreach to service providers and other community members.   Jax and Renae answer the questions prior to interviewing Jenny to show how limited even professional counselors can be in understanding all the dynamics of sex trafficking.  Sex trafficking is constantly evolving and changing and getting harder and harder to infiltrate and stop.  If one doesn't work in the world of sex trafficking on a daily basis it's understandable how they wouldn't know all the details.  As parents, topics like sex trafficking are scary and therefore we are tempted to understandably avoid talking about it or even thinking about it.  But, if we want to keep our kids and teens safe we need to start learning more about it and there is a lot to learn.  Find Jax and Renae on social media by engaging with them in their facebook group for Moms of Tween/Teen Daughters: https://www.facebook.com/groups/momsandteengirls/?ref=bookmarks Jax Anderson can be found on IG @thepsykotherapist and Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jaxandersonlpc/ Renae Swanson can be found on IG @renae.d.swanson and at www.integritycounselingllc.net Join the email list for Raise A Little Hell Podcast here: www.raisealittlehellpodcast.com "Disclaimer: This podcast is informational and NOT a substitute, replacement or in conjunction with individual, family, couples’ and group psychotherapy. If you or someone you know is in need or seeking mental health services please contact your local mental health service provider. For more resources pertaining to mental health please visit https://www.nami.org/"

Sex Trafficking - What You Need To Know Part 1

Season 1, Episode 6 How To Talk Your Teen Through Sexual Trauma *TRIGGER WARNING* episode includes conversation regarding sexual assault and rape.   Jax and Renae discuss how to talk to your teen who has experienced sexual trauma either as a teen or as a child.  Although this is a sensitive topic and understandably challenging to talk about, it is a much needed conversation.   A staggering 95% of people have experienced some form of unwanted touch.  Therefore, this is an important conversation to have in order to support parents who may have a child or children who have been sexually assaulted, either from rape or unwanted touch.   Find Jax and Renae on social media by engaging with them in their facebook group for Moms of Tween/Teen Daughters: https://www.facebook.com/groups/momsandteengirls/?ref=bookmarks Jax Anderson can be found on IG @thepsykotherapist and Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jaxandersonlpc/ Renae Swanson can be found on IG @renae.d.swanson and at www.integritycounselingllc.net Join the email list for Raise A Little Hell Podcast here: www.raisealittlehellpodcast.com "Disclaimer: This podcast is informational and NOT a substitute, replacement or in conjunction with individual, family, couples’ and group psychotherapy. If you or someone you know is in need or seeking mental health services please contact your local mental health service provider. For more resources pertaining to mental health please visit https://www.nami.org/"

How To Talk Your Teen Through Sexual Trauma

Season 1, Episode 5: So Your Teen is Sexually Active   It’s hard to think about, but eventually, your kid will have sex.  Thinking about it can bring up all kinds of emotions for us as parents. Listening to this podcast will help you ready for the moment that you realize that your kid is sexually active. To help you prepare we cover the following topics in this episode: sleepovers, consent, new types of sex, and what age is appropriate for sexual activity.   Sleepovers: What were your best and worst sleepover experiences like? Like all parents you want your kids to have some of the good and not very much of the bad. It is so important to have a set of communicated expectations with your kids when it comes to sleepovers. We discuss common questions we are asked such as co-ed sleepovers, where should the sleepovers be, parental presence, boyfriends/girlfriends, and the temptations kids face.    Consent: What is consent? Most of us did not grow up learning about consent. For the purposes of this podcast, consent is defined as engaging in contact that both parties voluntarily agree too. Please note that no one can give consent if they are in any way impaired. It is important to talk to your kids about what consent is and what it looks like when consent goes well; also, what can happen if they don’t seek consent. Make a plan with your kids when they don’t feel safe giving consent. Cell phones can be bad in so many ways, but in regards to safety, it is gold!   New ways to be sexually active: Kids today are very well informed about different types of sexual activity and available tools. They largely do their homework before they do anything.  Your child may know more about sex than you do!  We discuss new topics and hardware that you may not be aware of yet, and give some guidance about how to talk to your kid about these topics.   Sex Timeline: Does your teen have a timeline they believe they have to meet? Many teens have a belief they are “supposed” to have sex or be in a relationship with others by a certain age. Their expectations may come from their friends. They may also get their expectations from you. Model what you want them to know. Talk to them about what you believe is a healthy timeline.   How old should a kid be before they have sex? We want our teens to be emotionally and developmentally ready to have sex. If your teen is able to engage with you and talk about sex, they are most likely ready. If not, it may be that they have the interest but are not yet mature enough to handle sex. We discuss general guidelines for when your teen might be ready.    Resources Sleep Overs:  https://www.parents.com/kids/development/social/ready-for-a-sleepover/   https://health.usnews.com/wellness/for-parents/articles/2017-10-12/the-pros-and-cons-of-teen-sleepovers   https://yourteenmag.com/social-life/teenagers-friends/coed-sleepovers   https://www.parentmap.com/article/teen-coed-sleepovers   Consent: https://www.sexandu.ca/consent/what-is-consent/   https://www.rainn.org/articles/what-is-consent   https://kidshelpline.com.au/teens/issues/what-consent   http://worldpopulationreview.com/states/age-of-consent-by-state/   Modern Teen Sex https://www.hrc.org/resources/a-call-to-action-lgbtq-youth-need-inclusive-sex-education   https://www.chicagotribune.com/news/ct-met-lgbtq-teens-parents-sex-talk-20180406-story.html   https://www.huffpost.com/entry/modern-day-sex-talk-_n_6171136   https://www.teensource.org/blog/2010/06/my-favorite-websites-teens-and-sexual-health If you have questions you can reach us at jax@psykotherapist.com Join our mailing list here: www.RaiseALittleHellPodcast.com Connect with us on social at Facebook: Jax Anderson - The Psyko Therapist Jax IG: @thepsykotherapist Renae IG: @renae.d.swanson    

So Your Teen Is Sexually Active

Season 1: Episode 4 My Teen wants to have SEX! We know it is scary, uncomfortable, and weird, but you have to talk to your teen about sex waaaaay before they are interested. We tackle the signs your kids might show when they are interested in sex, how to manage your reactions and ways to do the deed (talk to them). Signs  Your kids may tell you; however, it is way more likely that they are going to show you!  Get prepared, you are going to see their clothes change; underwear gets fancier and smaller, Hanes and Fruit of the Loom are no longer acceptable.  Kids that were not at all interested in their appearance are suddenly spending more time in the bathroom and on their appearance than you previously thought possible.  They might change how they talk about those that they are interested in. All of a sudden you hear the same name over and over, or you no longer hear about kids you used to hear about…Pay attention your kid is getting ready. Your Response is Everything Pretend your child just asked you a question or you “caught” your child “messing around.”  What emotions do you imagine you would feel? Your response in these “big” moments is so important. Your child is making determinations about whether you are safe or not by your micro expressions!  I know it’s scary, but you’ve got this!  If you are nervous or a bit embarrassed about sex yourself, it is so important to practice ahead of time. Our responses and reactions to our teens are a part of the foundation of healthy or unhealthy sex as an adult.  Talking about Sex I always wanted to believe that schools are giving our kids what they need, but we all know that kids are not certain how to ask questions at school. Not only that, but Sex Ed in public schools is very heteronormative. This is what we have learned. Be specific, your kids are not going to make the connection between “body fluids” and sex. Their brains are not ready for that type of work. It might even help to ask them the terms that they use!  Ask Questions!  We have heard from other parents that they have been nervous about asking questions about sexual topics because they will say things wrong. Many parents have had experiences using terminology incorrectly and feeling ashamed of other's reactions. Reach out and ask professionals that are trained to educate you. They will help you learn and may have tips for how to learn more. We have provided some great resources for parents below. By parents, we mean parts of straight kids, gay kids, nonbinary kids, all the kids.  Expectations are Key for YOU and THEM  Choice-based education is best! Don’t offer threats that you cannot serve logical consequences for; such as “You are going to get an STD from having sex”.  They may view that as an opportunity to check and see. Teach them about sex and consequences before they are even interested. Set your expectations long before kids are ready. If they know what you expect from the get-go and it was shared with them at a neutral time, they are way more likely to make healthy choices. The whole goal is to help your kids learn, so they can make their own choices. If you see that it is incredibly difficult to trust your teen. That may be more about you than them. If so, reach out to friends, support systems, and/or a counselor. Resources Talking to your kids about sex https://healthfinder.gov/healthtopics/category/parenting/healthy-communication-and-relationships/talk-to-your-kids-about-sex   https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/parents/tips-talking   https://www.healthline.com/health/parenting/ultimate-guide-to-sex-talk#when-to-talk   Gender and Sexuality   https://www.thetrevorproject.org/?gclid=EAIaIQobChMImZ7X-vr35gIVAtbACh0GVQs6EAAYASAAEgK-cPD_BwE   https://www.genderbread.org/   https://www.hrc.org/resources/resources-for-people-with-transgender-family-members   Parenting LGBTQ+ Youth   https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/wellness-and-prevention/tips-for-parents-of-lgbtq-youth   https://pflag.org/loving-families   https://www.hrc.org/resources/all-children-all-families-caring-for-lgbtq-children-youth       Resources for our academic audience   Roffman, D.M. (2011). A review of talking to your kids about sex: Turning “the talk” into a conversation for life. American Journal of Sexuality Education, 6, pp. 326-328.   Telingator, C, & Webster, C.R. (2019). The birds and the bees: Speaking to children, adolescents, and families about gender and sexuality. Journal of the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, 58, pp. S10.   Bersamin, M; Todd, M.; Fisher, D.A.; Hill, D.L. Grube, J.W; & Walker, S. (2008). Parenting practices and adolescent sexual behavior: A longitudinal study. Journal of Marriage and Family, 70, 97-112

How to Know Your Teen Wants To Have Sex

Jax Anderson and Renae Swanson are two mental health professionals helping parents decode the tween and teen years.   Jax and Renae have worked with tweens and teens for a combination of 35+ years and their experience and creative parenting solutions have proven valuable for parents around the world.   They aren't afraid to talk about the 'tough stuff', the topics and issues that many mental health professionals steer clear from speaking publicly about when it comes to raising tweens and teens.   Join Jax and Renae as they begin the journey of talking about the topic of raising tweens and teens in the world today.   Find them on social media by engaging with them in their facebook group for Moms of Tween/Teen Daughters: https://www.facebook.com/groups/momsandteengirls/?ref=bookmarks Jax Anderson can be found on IG @thepsykotherapist and Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jaxandersonlpc/ Join the email list for Raise A Little Hell Podcast here: www.raisealittlehellpodcast.com

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Raise A Little Hell Podcast

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