In this session, I ask Lachlan how I can help. What he needs is clarity and direction for how to maintain and cultivate an open and welcoming space for all voices to be heard at the Birmingham Unicorns Cricket club meetings. The challenge he has is that committee meetings are open to all who wish to attend. It’s easy to get overwhelmed by all the individual voices, but the club wants to remain open and inclusive, especially for the upcoming Annual General Meeting. Added to this is the challenge of meeting virtually due to COVID-19 and how Zoom meetings affect the flow of group communication.Read the complete show notes here: https://thinkqueerly.com/fostering-an-lgbtq-cricket-clubs-ethos-and-culture-of-inclusion-acceptance-and-individual-value-bdee2737ddecJoin me live, for one of my weekly Think Queerly LGBTQ+ Creator’s Forums. And if you’re a queer creator who’s struggling with any part of your business or creative project, let’s meet for an IDEA(tion) Discovery Session to help you get clarity, focus, and direction.

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Fostering an LGBTQ+ Cricket Club's Ethos and Culture of Inclusion, Acceptance, and Individual Value

In the book, “When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times,” Pema Chödrön expresses the idea of not causing harm to yourself or others. Of course, she means causing no physical harm, but just as important, not causing harm to ourselves by the ways in which we think about ourselves. For example, not being self-deprecating when we don’t believe in ourselves and not being overly self-critical.If we don’t love ourselves, it may be that we haven’t questioned the beliefs we hold about certain things in our lives. We may go about our lives based on these uncritically held beliefs — also not knowing what we value. When something happens that’s perceived as a negative, we blame ourselves. For example, a gay man dealing with gay shame or anyone who identifies as queer dealing with the shame of being othered — having felt like they never fit in growing up as a child and adolescent. Not having seen yourself properly represented in a meaningful, thoughtful, loving, and self-accepting way while growing up during your formative years can play havoc with your self-love.Read the complete post at Think Queerly on Medium.If you would like to have a more in-depth discussion about how you can become more mindful — and how that can have an impact on your skillfulness as a queer creative or thought leader — let’s meet for a conversation.

LGBTQ+ People Are Uniquely Self-Aware and Can Teach Respect and Compassion for a Common Humanity

Ken Popert’s name kept showing up in the historical research Jeff has been doing at the Human Sexuality Archive at Cornell, and for one of his courses, “Making Public Queer History.” Jeff recognized Ken’s name because I used to work at Pink Triangle Press (PTP) in Toronto, Canada where Ken was my direct report. I had also talked about PTP, and its founding publication, The Body Politic, in an interview (with Jeff as co-host) with the authors of “Out North: An Archive of Queer Activism and Kinship in Canada” about a year ago.The notes for today's show are extensive. For guest bios, episode notes, and a "Historical Background of Gay Activism at Cornell" prepared by Jeffry J. Iovannone, please see the supporting article here:https://thinkqueerly.com/an-intergenerational-conversation-with-gay-activist-ken-popert-58296cdfa17c 

An Intergenerational Conversation With Gay Activist Ken Popert

Ro Rose is currently a student at the Somatic Sex Education Institute. They have been working with me for the last four months. I coach Ro around IDEA(tion) — to help them gain Insight, establish consistent Direction, and take efficient steps that are in Emotional Alignment to maintain momentum while making progress on what they want to accomplish.In this Think Queerly IDEA(tion) Coaching episode, I ask Ro what question or struggle they want to work through in our session. Ro has noticed in their study of Somatic sex education and movement that practitioners are taught to “down-regulate” during treatment to calm down — which is the opposite of what they want to do.Ro wants to know how to marry their own excitation (which they love about themselves and tend towards, mostly as a form of trauma response relating to their ADHD and neuroscience-diversity) with the pairing of creative art therapies and somatic therapies. They also want to find more ways to offer invitations to people to engage in play and excitation within the lens of mindfulness and somatics.Read the complete show notes at Think Queerly on Medium.Is It 2022 Already?If you’re wondering how to make a difference in your life for 2022, consider these questions:What are you most passionate about? What excites you, brings you joy, and motivates you? Are you spending as much time and energy on your passion as you’d like?What are you struggling with at the moment? What do you think is causing that and what’s stopping you from solving this problem?What’s your number one goal? Or, what’s the most impactful goal you want to accomplish over the next 90-days? What would achieving that goal make of you?If you’d like to dive deeper into these questions with me, let’s have a conversation so that I can help you get clarity, focus, and direction to one or more of your answers to the questions above. Click here to watch a short video and request a discovery call with me. 

Brainstorming Playful Gamification for a Non-Cis Gender Somatic Pleasure Practice

Over the past year or more in publishing my ideas, I have noticed that my messaging might appear scattered, if not confusing. That’s on me, and I have taken to rectify that. If you only want to hear about Queer topics, Think Queerly is what you want in your ears.The Think Queerly Podcast explores the mutually arising relationship between the status quo and all things queer. A queer perspective is the counter-balance that supports a healthy, loving, and equitable society. On the show, I explore queer history, social and political issues, and I have discussions with queer leaders and creators who are making a positive difference in the world. You can follow Think Queerly on Medium where I publish full episode notes and articles.If you’re interested in personal evolution, humane leadership, and a virtue philosophy for the common good, The Way of Human(e) Heartedness is the community you want to be a part of.The Way of Human(e) Heartedness is a non-dogmatic approach to lead with personal responsibility for equity and the common good. Influenced by the wisdom of the Tao Te Ching, Human(e) Heartedness is a conscious practice that cultivates the values of non-contention, humility, compassion, impartiality, yielding flexibility, and oneness. Practiced together, these values foster inclusion, equity, understanding, and respect for humanity. To nurture these values, I share my Personal Evolution Processes (P.E.P.) based on the neuroscience of transformational coaching to become more skillful in life and to enjoy more happiness, contentment, and freedom.If these ideas and ideals appeal to you, I invite you to subscribe.I have created a new home on Substack where you can subscribe to The Way of Human(e) Heartedness — and enjoy the new podcast as well.

What to Expect from the Think Queerly Podcast in 2022

“RED X,” David Demchuk’s second novel, is about a series of disappearances from Toronto’s gay community over a 40-year period (actually over 200 years), and the efforts of surviving friends and family to find out who or what is responsible. Interwoven is David Demchuk’s own story as a horror writer, as a gay man, and as someone whose novel is breaching the boundaries of fiction and entering his life.Read the full show notes here: https://thinkqueerly.com/queerness-horror-memoir-and-toronto-lgbtq-history-in-red-x-a-new-novel-by-david-demchuk-f0874651dfa7About David DemchukAward-winning author David Demchuk has been writing for print, stage, digital and other media for more than 40 years. His debut horror novel The Bone Mother, published in 2017, was nominated for the Scotiabank Giller Prize, the Amazon First Novel Award, the Toronto Book Award, the Kobzar Book Award and a Shirley Jackson Award in the Best Novel category. It won the 2018 Sunburst Award for Excellence in Canadian Literature of the Fantastic in the Adult Fiction category. It was listed in the Globe and Mail's 100 best books of 2017, came in at #22 in the National Post's top 99 books of the year and became a #1 bestseller on Amazon.ca. His troubling new novel RED X was published by Strange Light in August 2021. He is represented by Barbara Berson of the Helen Heller Literary Agency. He currently lives in Toronto.Follow David on Instagram, Twitter, or visit his website to purchase his books.

Queerness, Horror, Memoir, and Toronto LGBTQ History in “RED X” — a New Novel by David Demchuk

Underlying my work is my philosophy of human-heartedness. This is a non-dogmatic approach to lead with personal responsibility for equity and the common good — a way of being that improves open-mindedness, reduces contention, and increases kindness, compassion, and understanding for others.Looking back over this past year, I believe that I have created and shared meaningful content that speaks to my philosophy and offers ideas and practices to create more clarity, focus, and direction in your life. My Top 10 ListSome Thoughts on the Issues to Consider for Leaving Facebook.Freddie Lewis On Using Music and Poetry to Share His Journey of Finding Self-Love as a Queer Person.Banned From California — Jim Foshee’s Life of Persecution, Redemption, Liberation, and the Gay Civil Rights Movement.Michael Bach — Internationally Recognized Thought Leader in Inclusion, Diversity, Equity, and Accessibility.What Can You Control in Your Life to Experience More Love, Happiness, and Freedom?How Can You Reduce the Anxiety of Overwhelm?What Should You Do When You Don’t Feel Competent Enough?Forget Affirmations, What You Need Are ‘Statements of Self-Truth.’Universal Human Dignity: Human Love and Self-Expression Must be Free.On Staying Insecure and Embracing Imposter Syndrome.Read the full article on my new Substack page — The Way of Human(e) Heartedness: https://darrenstehle.substack.comAre You Ready to Make a Positive Impact in 2022?On Wednesday, December 29 at 1:00 PM (EST), I'm hosting a counter-intuitive approach to the usual end-of-year review in a free, live & interactive coaching webinar. Learn more and reserve your seat for the webinar by clicking here.Where You Stand ProgramA 13-Week Personal Evolution Group Coaching Program Starting Monday, January 17, 2022. Discover how to build a solid, personal foundation supported by the neuroscience of transformational coaching for clarity, focus, direction, and emotional alignment. Details and sign-up for the program here: https://darrenstehle.com/coaching/where-you-stand-program/

My Top 10 Articles and Think Queerly Podcast Episodes from 2021

What Are Character Traits?A simple way of framing character traits is to think of an actor playing a character in a movie. The actor needs to embody the character’s attitude and personality for the viewer to believe how the actor is behaving. Character traits are what we use to describe who we are and how we act. For example, you can describe someone’s character as kind, thoughtful, aggressive, or aloof. Your dominant character traits describe and demonstrate what you most value and believe in. These are the qualities that support your integrity. When you stand your ground in the truth of your authentic nature, you are doing so without the need to be conscious of choosing your actions.Read the full article: https://darrenstehle.com/character-traits-ground-who-you-are/

What Are the Character Traits that Ground Who You Are?

It’s time for something new on the Think Queerly Podcast. I’m excited to bring you what I plan to be a once-a-month feature episode in which I coach one of my clients — raw, unscripted, and unplanned. If you ever wondered how I coach, or what it’s like to be coached, I know you will enjoy these episodes.This is what you will hear during this IDEAtion Coaching session with Jon Carl Lewis. In him, you will witness a wonderful example of what Human(e) Thought Leadership looks like. Enjoy!Read the complete show notes here: https://thinkqueerly.com/owning-the-powerful-distinction-its-not-about-me-it-s-about-the-product-b250d0852936You’re Ready to Make a Positive Impact in 2022!Discover a counter-intuitive approach to the usual end-of-year review. If you want to make an impact in 2022, discover the core foundations of self-mastery to not only make a difference, but to experience more happiness, contentment, and freedom. Join me on Wednesday, December 29 at 1:00 PM (EST). For details and to reserve your spot, click here: https://pages.darrenstehle.com/end-of-2021-webinar

Owning the Powerful Distinction: ‘It's Not About Me, It's About the Product.’

I Envision a World that Respects All of HumanityTo lead yourself from such a noble place — as if that place already existed — you will need to practice and embody values, principles, and beliefs that support a universal human dignity.However, I’m not suggesting a belief in a spiritual entity, following a religion, or a set of commandments. Instead, this is the personal responsibility of cultivating a loving, equitable, and harmonious humanity that — I believe — is both an individual and collective human responsibility. This is our ultimate, equitable endeavour.Read the article on Medium:https://medium.com/curious/human-e-thought-leadership-how-to-be-the-change-for-the-common-good-through-self-mastery-94afca2461ebReserve your seat for my, "Ready to Make a Positive Impact in 2022 Webinar:"https://pages.darrenstehle.com/end-of-2021-webinar

Human(e) Thought Leadership: How to Be the Change for the Common Good Through Self-Mastery

Recently, I read in the Guardian that "Top Republicans rub shoulders with extremists in secretive rightwing group, leak reveals."The details of the reporting stuck in my head. Then a question came to mind: Why are some rightwing extremist groups so secretive? What have they got to hide? The only reason these kinds of groups are secretive is not because they are ashamed. These organizations are secretive because they know they are morally wrong. They know they are wrong because their beliefs and actions will harm, hurt, subjugate, control, abuse, indoctrinate, manipulate, and kill people. They know they are being inhuman —  they are acting inhumane  — albeit mostly unconsciously, since the majority have been so deeply brainwashed, they don't know how to think critically for themselves. If you can't respect the basic existential dignity of another human being  — which doesn't mean you have to agree with them —  you do not respect yourself. Read the article: "Why Are Rightwing Extremist Groups So Secretive?" https://thinkqueerly.com/why-are-rightwing-extremist-groups-so-secretive-c592d8cd78c6For exclusive content, weekly live office hours, and to join my community, subscribe here: https://darrenstehle.substack.com.

Why Are Rightwing Extremist Groups So Secretive?

Over the course of a bit more than a year, I’ve published a number of personal growth exercises. I gave the process the name, Personal Evolution Process (PEP). Each process follows a structure to help you define the problem or challenge at hand. You then further refine the problem by turning your thoughts around or considering influencing factors. Lastly, you create emotional alignment with your chosen strategies that will support your motivation and commitment to resolving the problem.Read the article on my blog for the links to the PEPs:https://thinkqueerly.com/try-these-transformational-strategies-to-create-more-happiness-freedom-and-certainty-in-your-life-fdea58d506cbFor exclusive content, weekly live office hours, and to join my community, subscribe here: https://darrenstehle.substack.com.

Try These Transformational Strategies to Create More Happiness, Freedom, and Certainty in Your Life

When you’re faced with the choice between two significant polarities in life and don't know how to decide which one is best, try this Personal Evolution Process.This process will help you to get clarity and certainty about what's most important and meaningful to you about both options, and then choose the one that provides the most emotional alignment. In other words, when you can connect your choice with your emotional intentions, you are most likely to feel best about the choice and remain committed to it.Today’s PEP is not meant for the "simple" yes or no choices in life. Instead, the power of this Personal Evolution Process is revealed in breaking down two opposing and challenging choices that you are struggling with and are holding you back.Read the complete article: https://darrenstehle.com/two-difficult-choices-how-do-you-decide/

When You're Stuck Between Two Difficult Choices, How Do You Decide?

Last week, a friend of mine wrote a post on Facebook to say that she was strongly considering leaving Facebook forever.While she benefits from some aspects of the platform, she wrote that she feels out of integrity supporting a platform that is detrimental to the current and future society she wants to live in. By remaining on Facebook, she is encouraging their business model and rewarding their decision-making. From a values perspective, she feels like it's time to leave.She concluded by asking people to offer contrarian perspectives. In today's episode, I share my response and further thoughts.Read the post on Think Queerly: "Some Thoughts on the Issues to Consider for Leaving Facebook."https://thinkqueerly.com/some-thoughts-on-the-issues-to-consider-for-leaving-facebook-b97493cc3a8cFor exclusive content, weekly live office hours, and to join my community, subscribe here: https://darrenstehle.substack.com.

Thoughts on the Issues to Consider for Leaving Facebook

Queer Thought Leadership, self-examination, and LGBTQ inclusion. Host Darren Stehle discusses the unique and vital socio-cultural contributions that LGBTQ+ peoples offer humanity. He critiques the status quo — challenging heteronormativity, patriarchy, prejudice, bigotry, and radicalized ideologies — and offers solutions to create a more loving and accepting world.

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Think Queerly

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