The Missing Step? Savoring Our Work   On this episode of Uniquely Brilliant, Diana Bader and Becky Berry talk about the missing step in our work and personal lives.   Diana begins the episode by talking about a conversation she had with her son about how he was improving his life. She shared his experience of playing a video game where he and a friend  came to the conclusion that to get tasks done in life, we must break each part down into little pieces.    We should also remember to look at where we came from, and the work we did to get where we are. When we forget to look back to where we came from and the steps we took to get to our end result, we are being dismissive of the work it took to get there.    Becky summed up this process by naming it “chunk and reflect.”   When we review the work that brought us to our current place, we are supercharged going forward. It gives us a focused momentum because we understand where we came from and acknowledge what it took to get here.    Also, when we take what we like and leave the rest, we move forward. We unbind ourselves from other people’s ideas and expectations and exercise agency in our choices. We let go of what isn't working.    Reviewing our work forces us to pause. And, when we embrace the pause, we think more clearly while moving forward.    The process?  Review progress (How did we get here? What needs to change?), Savor that progress, then move forward to the next action or project.

Uniquely Brilliant Podcast

Episode 152: The Missing Step

In today’s episode, Becky Berry and Diana Bader talk about the difference between presence and focus.   Being present is being fully engaged in the moment. It's taking the time to listen fully.    Since energy flows to where our  thoughts go, when our thoughts are scattered, our energy is also scattered. Being present mentally and physically keeps us aligned.    When our energy is aligned, our thoughts are calmer. The act of being present allows us to focus.    We have to engage our bodies before our minds. When we align our bodies, and ground ourselves physically in the present, we think more clearly.    Focus is a brain activity. When we bring our energy into the moment we can bring our minds into it, too.   Diana has Becky do the 5 Senses Exercise to demonstrate how to be present (aka grounded). Here’s how it works:  We look around and name 5 things we see.  We close our eyes, listen closely, then name 4 things we hear. We reach out and touch 3 things and notice how they feel.  We sniff and identify 2 things we smell. We identify 1 thing we can taste.    As we go through the exercise, it brings us back into our bodies and into the present moment.    Where our energy goes, our mind flows.  The book referred to in this episode is The Extended Mind: The Power of the Thinking Outside the Brain by Annie Murphy Paul.

Episode 151 Presence v Focus

In this episode of Uniquely Brilliant, Becky Berry and Diana Bader talk about thinking, the third component of productivity from the book, Essentialism by Greg McKeown.    Becky shares how she gets blocked when she does not think before she makes a big move.   The precepts of Essentialism consist of narrowing things down to the essentials. The process is virtually impossible to accomplish if we don’t invest time in figuring out what is essential to us.    Sleeping, thinking, and playing are the three pillars of being productive. And, the most successful, productive people schedule thinking time on their calendar!   It’s when we invest our time in stopping and thinking about what we want, that we can create purposeful movement forward. By gifting ourselves with time to think, we create room to identify what is truly important.   Diana reminds us to view the big shifts that happen as a result of our thinking as adventures.    Sometimes we have to get lost in our thoughts to figure out what we’re really thinking about!     Thought gives us the ability to see where we are and where we want to go from a fresh prespective.   Pause and think!

Episode 150: Think

  In this episode of Uniquely Brilliant, Diana Bader and Becky Berry discuss our absolute need for adequate sleep, how to get it, and the results of inadequate sleep.   Good sleep is critical to our bodies performing to the best of their abilities.    Sleep protects both our physical and mental assets.   Even when we miss sleep and feel like we are doing ok, the lack of sleep will eventually catch up to us.   Our brains store what they learned during the day while they sleep. And, while we’re sleeping our brains also get some well-needed rest!   When we’re not sleeping enough, it’s impossible to be as productive as we could be.    Yoga Nidra is a yoga practice that simulates what the brain does during sleep. It has said to be as refreshing as 8 hours of sleep. Here’s a 20-minute practice video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7H0FKzeuVVs   Becky and Diana share how they feel after a night of no sleep. Diana says it's much harder to work out, and Becky says she feels heavy.   They discuss how we all function differently when it comes to sleep and our innate biorhythms.. Some people are morning people, and others function better at night - and that’s perfect. It is important that we understand our own biorhythms so we can respect them.    Becky and Diana also discuss different ways to get to sleep. Diana does a guided meditation, while Becky reads on her Kindle.    They share the concept of making a list of things to do to help us get to sleep.    Sleep gives us the energy and brain power to handle whatever comes at us the next day!   ©2021 Cronecast Podcast Network Music ©2015 Max Brodie

Episode 149: Sleep Baby Sleep

On this episode of Uniquely Brilliant Diana Bader and Becky Berry talk about the importance of play. Lila is Diana’s word of the year. Lila, which means playful manifestation in Sanskrit. She shares how she is enacting its spirit. They talk about the way spending 5 minutes in a day can change our outlook. Becky shares three things you need to be productive: sleep, play, and then planning and guarding those things with your life. What constitutes play? We may hear the word play and think, oh that sounds frustrating. Perhaps we’re thinking of  childhood games that everyone but you loved. Tag, anyone? Play can be anything that you enjoy doing! As Becky says, if you like cooking, then that is playing. If your favorite thing to do is run then that is play for you! If you find joy in it, it’s play. They talk about strategies to find your joy when you need a lift. Diana suggests making a playlists of songs you like to dance to and playing one of the songs to access that lift. We need play to be more productive. Without the release of play, we cannot perform at our full potential. We can train ourselves to look for playful moments. Some playful things include coloring, doodling, watching funny videos, and sharing gifs with friends. Schedule five minutes of play everyday!   ©2021 Cronecast Podcast Network Music ©2015 Max Brodie

Episode 148: 5 Minutes of Play

How do we know how to get to the next place when we don’t know what the next place is?  Becky Berry and Diana Bader cover this question in this episode of Uniquely Brilliant. Diana points out one way is to focus on the short term because we must get out of crisis mode and make a plan for the near future.  Becky reminds us that we have to remember things are different and we must just get through things now, while Diana reminds us to let go of how things were before the pandemic.  By letting go of the past we are able to move forwards, which leads to growth. Going backwards keeps us stuck and improves nothing.  Fear and panic will not help us to move forward either. Becky admits that going with the flow is not her natural mode, but she tells a story about her 85 year old mom going with the flow when the eye doctor told her she couldn't drive anymore.  If you allow change to become an adventure and look at the opportunities presented in the moment, you can do things differently.  Diana hints at a secret project she is involved in all because she was open to change and new opportunities. You can’t go with the flow if you are weighed down by the past; And, if you fight the flow you’ll eventually be beaten down until you go with the flow or end up stuck where you are. Diana shares this analogy: When you are on the water, you aren’t in charge of the water, so you just have to go with it. Expressing agency (Becky’s favorite word) in these situations occurs when you know you are in charge of your actions and you go with the flow by thinking through things (instead of reacting) and trusting yourself and your experience.

Episode 147: Go with the Flow Part 2

In this episode, Becky and Diana discuss what it's like to be living in today’s world, including questions like: How do we deal with the new reality of not knowing if you should hug people or fist bump? Diana Bader talks about how everything is just a little disjointed.  They discuss the importance of knowing how to ground yourself. Diana shares this sensory exercise for grounding: Identify five things you can see, four things you can hear, three things you can smell, two things you can touch, and one thing you can taste. Becky tries it on for size. This exercise helps to bring you back to your senses. Plus breathing - always remember to breathe.  Becky Berry mentions walking in the grass with bare feet to ground herself.  They share their experiences around mental grounding and meditation. They observe that not everyone can visualize, so it's a great idea to use guided meditations or other meditations that work better for you.   Shamanic Drumming and Humming on YouTube:  https://youtu.be/ivCOrc1HWxI Today’s Tidbit Find what soothes you when you’re feeling disjointed and out of sorts. It could be a bath, glass of wine, or meditative chants.

Episode 146: Soothe Yourself by Grounding

Diana Bader and Becky Berry talk about a favorite topic: adventure! Diana refers to everything as an adventure. As a matter of fact, originally, each episode of Uniquely Brilliant was called “The Adventure of ....”.  As Diana says, “Life is an adventure because you never know what is coming.” She talks about her experience moving back up north to Ohio from Atlanta. She felt the full force of the good and the bad and how it’s critical to not set expectations. Becky talks about her experience with her coworking space and the trials of letting it evolve in a pandemic.  Diana shares the losses she has experienced in her life and the reason she continues to see possibilities everywhere. They identify the 3 things that help turn things from ordeals to adventures: Curiosity, Wonder, and Risk Tolerance.  Diana reminds us to live in the moment because the only way you make memories is when you’re in the present moment!  What is an adventure if not the ultimate good memory? Today's Tidbits: Attitude is the difference between an ordeal and an adventure.  You know you are having an adventure when it’s cool and scary at the same time.  We can continuously build our own adventure - see #1!  

Episode 145: Build Your Own Adventure

Becky and Diana talk about all the ways people feel about talking. Becky shares her experience in opening a second business (her coworking space for women, MAD! Workspace) and all of the feelings that go along with starting it up and keeping it going in a pandemic.  She also talks about how she processes things through talking. She needs to hear the words coming out of her mouth to figure out what’s going on. On the other hand, Diana is an introvert, so she doesn’t need to talk things out to process them. She likes to mull things over, then figure some of it out herself a little before she shares. And, when she does share, there are only a few people she wants to share her thoughts with - like  Becky and this entire audience.  Diana points out that the difference between fear and excitement is breathing! Both emotions tap into the same place in the brain. They also talk about the importance of making deep connections with people and how rare it is to make deep connections with new people. The problem in making deep connections is that it takes time. And those people are important to have around you so you don’t feel judged. Diana talks about how she sometimes shuts down around people who are not open minded, and Becky reminds us that when we are ourselves, we find people who complement us. They also address this question: What do you do if someone doesn't want to talk? They agree that the best way to get someone to open up with us is to create an environment of trust by being patient and asking good questions. A key (and brave) question to ask? Why don’t you want to talk about it?  Something to ponder: Small talk means I see you. It serves a valuable purpose in setting the table for deeper discussions and connection.  

Episode 144: I Don't Want to Talk to You

Today Diana and Becky talk about how they get to do it (everything) differently! It’s hard to remember to rephrase the idea from “having to do it differently” to “getting to do it differently” but it makes a big difference in our mindset. “I get to do it differently” indicates agency and choice. They talk about VISION BOARDS! Diana shares her new workout with The Exercise Coach and how it meets her goals and desires.. They both cover how we can all do things differently, and how feedback can be important for growth. When we do it differently, we release any need to apologize or justify our actions. The critical takeaway is that everyone’s different is - wait for it - different! Choosing to do anything differently also means figuring out our unique differences. When we focus on strengthening our strengths instead of our weaknesses we own the power and value of our own experiences! Pause a minute and reflect on how today was a success!

Episode 143: Do It Differently

In this episode, Diana and Becky talk about the Art of Maintaining. This is a great episode for people who are struggling lately or drowning in the shoulda, woulda, couldas. Becky and Diana bring it back to the present and ask hard questions about what is really important and how we NEED to take care of ourselves. And Becky advocates for getting rid of the words “strive” and “working hard.” Sometimes in life we find ourselves needing to maintain rather than excel, and that's okay. Diana talks about appreciating the moment instead of settling by pushing through it. She also discusses the system she created to help her get through her days when she needs to just maintain. Diana also discusses how hard it was to maintain when she had a young child and how people in her life continuously pressured her to get more done. Becky reminds us that maintaining is a big part of Essentialism because when we choose to maintain instead of striving for more, we are claiming our own priorities and owning that it’s ok to be in the moment and take care of ourselves. When we tell ourselves we “should” be doing something, there is always someone else’s belief behind it. Instead, we must stop and ask ourselves if this belief is true right now or if it even matters to us. It’s easy to fall into the trap of feeling like you need to be doing more. Maintaining is giving up the illusion of control. Diana compares maintaining to being a superhero. To expand on the metaphor, when we maintain, we become like The Flash because we are slowing down everything around us and focusing solely on the important parts. While in Maintaining mode, priorities get really small and specific. It’s like wearing blinders and earplugs - and it takes a lot of practice. Self-care is the cornerstone of maintaining. Becky talks about the importance of having support for our self-care. We can enlist the help of family members, or friends, or acquaintances to remind us that in order to get through the current situation, we must take care of ourselves.

Episode 142: The Art of Maintaining

Becky talks about the different times in her life when people have tried and succeeded in silencing her because they thought she was too much and she believed them. Becky and Dana discuss the difference between saying that they don't care about something instead of saying it’s being important to them. Diana shares that when she doesn’t care about something, she works on reframing it as not being a priority to her. She also shares the story of high diving while in the Bahamas. Becky describes being told that she was too much as being “subtle and insidious.” It was never said aloud; it was implied in the way people talked to her and about her. When people label women as “too much,” it means they’re threatened by our ideas. Becky and Diana talk about how living by different norms threatens other people's ideas of how things are supposed to be. Diana talks about the book, Disrupt Her, by Miki Agrawal. They both talk about how they are disruptors in life and how they can both fall into  playing it small. When we finally accept who we are in life, it doesn’t matter what other people think. It also allows us to embrace being bigger and bolder. It’s important to surround yourself with people who accept your muchness because it allows you to be yourself. Finally, they talk about the freedom inherent in their bigness and how it enables them to fail fast, learn, and move forward. ©Cronecast Podcast Network · Music ©2015 Max Brodie  

Episode 141: Who Says We're Too Much?

Becky Berry and Diana Bader discuss the importance of bringing our whole selves to everything. They also dig into what happens when people only want to interact with a piece of us. Some notes: Our whole self is more than our individual pieces! We all wear different hats in our lives, but that doesn’t mean that's all we bring to the table. Diana talks about how someone recently wanted to experience only one piece of her in their relationship and they were unwilling to accept all of her. Since both Becky and Diana have chosen lifestyle professions, they have intentionally engineered their work so they bring their whole selves to their endeavors instead of compartmentalized pieces. They chat about this idea in the context of jobs that want us for only one skill instead of every single thing we bring to the table. Becky shares the story of how one of her best friends, Carolyn, became her best friend after she stopped seeing just one piece of her and opened up to seeing her more fully. Diana admits that she likes to know people more fully because of her curiosity. She feels judged when people only want to know her in pieces. They point out that it’s a missed opportunity when you’re only seeing one piece of a person. To stop seeing people in pieces, we first need to recognize their essence and open ourselves to seeing them in their totality. As Diana says, “Seeing the bonuses in life is just one moment of curiosity away!” Many of us act differently depending on the context we find ourselves in. Wholeness happens when we can be the same, no matter the context. Becky reveals her realization that she tends to judge her life harshly in pieces, instead of looking at the full picture. Diana knows that she is much more willing to see other people as whole than she is to see herself that way. Which leads to this caveat: We must treat ourselves the way we treat other people!

Episode 140: Life in Pieces

Becky Berry and Diana Bader talk about the critical importance of honoring our energy. Diana discusses the many issues she's had to deal with over the last year and how her expectations weren't met when she moved back to her hometown. All of these things have affected the energy level she can bring to her life. Becky and Diana are trying to figure out if they are tired because of the seasons changing or if they are just tired. Diana is mulling over whether her issues are physical or caused my emotional stress. She goes into detail about her timeline of events that led her to moving and the intricacies of being emotionally done with everything. She speaks of having to finally “put down her sword.” Diana shares how humor is one of the ways she gets replenished and they both relive a story and memory where they used humor to diffuse a rough situation. As Becky puts it, they have both become adept at grabbing the things that restore their energy. Diana talks about how she is focusing on building her community. She reminds us that laughter is great but it’s not as effective if you’re laughing alone. In short, we can only honor our energy when we’re also honoring our values and enforcing our boundaries. If you like the podcast, don’t keep it to yourself! Share it with a friend! It’s super easy to share episodes from Spotify, but you can do it from any platform. To review us on iTunes, go to this podcast in your iTunes library. Then, scroll down to ratings and reviews, click write a review, and write away!!! Thank you! ©2021 Cronecast Podcast Network | Music ©2015 Max Brodie

Episode 139: Obey Your Energy

Recorded in May 2020. This was our final Pandemic episode. Becky and Diana are so tired of being responsible and having to overthink about everything! They chat about what we can do to lower our tension levels and bring as much ease as possible back into our lives. Becky talks about the coworking space she owns and how she is tired of having to remember the safety rules for everything. And, since it’s Becky, how she finds refuge and relief in reading. Diana discusses the intricacies of going out to eat during the pandemic. As Diana said, “At the end of the day, the only person I can be responsible for me is me. And how I act and how I react to what’s out there.” Right now, the only thing we can really do is do our best and have faith that doing our best is good enough. They also cover meditation and prayer.Our bodies can tell us both how and what we’re feeling. Meditation helps with dealing with responsibility by allowing you to create more ease in your life by helping you figure out what’s your responsibility and what’s the weight from everything going on around you!   ©2021 Uniquely Brilliant | Music ©2015 Max Brodie

Episode 138: I'm Done With Responsibility!

The podcast with strategies for creative, quirky, and extraordinary people. Diana Bader and Becky Berry accompany you on the adventure of living life authentically. Learn to squelch the voices in your head that say you're wrong because you think differently and reclaim your best self. If your ideas and dreams are a little bit bigger than most people’s and you’re tired of feeling lost, frustrated or just plain wrong, this podcast is for you.

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Uniquely Brilliant Podcast

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