Ambridge to Nowhere

21. Chickens Have Guns And Are Homosexuals

Alex and Ray check back in yet again with the local goings on in Darrington. Always remember your corvid byelaws, folks. . . . cw: short mention of grief

20. DarringTonight

Improper gifts, break-ups, pen licences and rival villages. It's an action packed month. . . . . . cw: childbirth complications

19. Pischole the Tiny Hound

Ray and Alex discuss the miracle of birth.

18. Baby Come Out

Welcome to this bonus episode in which Alex listens to The Archers' pub quiz special celebrating 70 years on the air. At one point he says 'genitals' very emphatically. It's a good time all round.  This recording has been condensed, but if you would like to download Alex's full commentary track simply email the secret code and 34 box tops to ambridgetonowhere@gmail.com to claim your free prize.

A Very Special Episode: The 70th Birthday Pub Quiz

The metaphysical paradoxes of pub quiz patrons. Some bawdy cricket talk. Phillip Moss' slavery. One of these is not like the others and we wish we didn't have to talk about it.

17. Protestants are from PlayStation, Catholics are from Xbox

Borsetshire is only on the other side of the looking glass, a world of cake and wellies is but a whisper away from our reality. A chosen one may one day pierce the astral veil between our divided realms. Until then our only window across the cosmic divide is Radio 4. If Radio 4 really exists at all...

16. Princess Digimon Dies on Air

cw: underage drinking, drinking while pregnant, alcoholism, modern slavery As you can tell from our content warnings, The Archers really brought the festive spirit this month.

15. Darkest Days of the Year

I don't need to write this description, Jerry's handling it.

14. Civic Duty is a Ladder

In this Joycean epic we encounter mathematics, birthday wishes, a lost fortune, and a trying test of will. By 'will' I mean memory. It's a test of memory.

13. Jill's School for Gifted Archers

My name's Welly Wearer and I want to commit crimes with fire.

12. Gigabyte Brother

Ray and Alex don't spot a Shoebill but they do spot some rare dialogue.

11. Big Sexy Radish

CW: brief mention of passive suicidality. Why does Ray listen to The Archers? Why is a Weetabix not like a Shreddie? Can a horse Uber itself? Why have I used so many brand names in this month's blurb? These are the big questions.

10. Are We Human Or Are We Farmer

Ray and Alex disregard the new monologue format and the cow it rode in on. Instead they embark upon a quest of unbridled creativity.

9. Pavlova Pavlava

Ray and Alex explode back onto the scene with a fireball of an episode.

8. What a Blast!

BBC Radio's The Archers has been on the air since 1951, and its all been leading up to this. If you've ever wanted to hear 100% of two young people discussing the events of The Archers when only 50% of them actually listens to The Archers, then you sure must be glad you found Ambridge to Nowhere. Artwork by AK Nix

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Ambridge to Nowhere

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