Today's episode is brought to you by:The Energy City Race: This is the Permian Basin’s largest road running event, and this year, the 5k, 10k, and Half Marathon event will be held on Saturday October 16th at the Fasken Oil and Ranch office park. The race is hosted by the Camron Stotts Foundation, an organization dedicated to carrying on Camron’s spirit of charity in our community with his passion for service to others. The Stotts Foundation uses the proceeds from the race to make grants to local non-profits with a focus on single-mothers, displaced children, the homeless, and victims of human trafficking. You can sign up or learn more at www.energycityrace.com, and be sure to use the discount code NoNeutralRunners (all one word) to save 20% on your registration!Admarc: The foundation of a product or company is its logo. Along with your brand identity it shapes how people define your company. For over three decades Admarc has designed logos for companies small and large across the Permian Basin and the country. After all, your identity is by design.Visit Admarc online at admarc.com or email Darrell, darrell@admarc.comLuchini & Mertz Land Surveying Co., a resilient business on a mission to faithfully serve clients & empower employees—all the while, building lifelong relationships through the art, science, and process of land surveying. In business since 1952, Luchini & Mertz is known for their dedication to clients and their customer service. Contact Bobby Burkholder for your surveying needs: bobbyb@luchinimertz.com///Consensus is the lazy leader's excuse to avoid conflict and discussion. Consensus is used a lot in terms like "climate consensus" or "scientific consensus" and it's used to silence a debate or control a narrative. Most of us don't know that it's happening to us but we know that it's happening around us.Consensus: general agreement or a majority opinion"...consensus is how we bully people into pretending that there's nothing to see, move along, everyone." (Tim Ferris interview with Eric Weinstein, episode 131)Establish the habit of challenging that which has become the consensus in your life (personally, professionally, spiritually)7 Practices/Suggestions:Realize the validity of occasional consensusPay close attention to when you are operating by consensus and not by expectations, progress, and/or targetsGet in the habit of regularly questioning the way you do thingsIntentionally challenge everythingAs you're challenging consensus, avoid challenging peopleAvoid guarding/protecting/defending/blaming when you're challenging consensusAccept the fact that some things will change and some will not

No Neutral Moments

Consensus

Today's episode is brought to you by:The Energy City Race: This is the Permian Basin’s largest road running event, and this year, the 5k, 10k, and Half Marathon event will be held on Saturday October 16that the Fasken Oil and Ranch office park. The race is hosted by the Camron Stotts Foundation, an organization dedicated to carrying on Camron’s spirit of charity in our community with his passion for service to others. The Stotts Foundation uses the proceeds from the race to make grants to local non-profits with a focus on single-mothers, displaced children, the homeless, and victims of human trafficking. You can sign up or learn more at www.energycityrace.com, and be sure to use the discount code NoNeutralRunners (all one word) to save 20% on your registration!Admarc: The foundation of a product or company is its logo. Along with your brand identity it shapes how people define your company. For over three decades Admarc has designed logos for companies small and large across the Permian Basin and the country. After all, your identity is by design.Visit Admarc online at admarc.com or email Darrell, darrell@admarc.com Leaders start with an idea of what they want to be or become but they don't go back and revisit or revise. This is not really about setting goals (this is a secondary step).The Franklin planner I use.Value of Freedom and Opportunity: "I do whatever it is I can and must do to enable myself my family and others the opportunity to become and pursue all that God has designed, called, and gifted them be. I am committed to the tireless effort to remove obstacles that society and institutions erect in order to hold others back. I believe that the Lord is the final judge of what we can and cannot do, and it is not our place to make this call but rather to wholly trust in the Lord while at the same time offering every opportunity for others to live out a new life of freedom in Christ that chases after everything we are designed, called, and gifted to be." Verse references: Galatians 5, Ephesians 5, Romans 8Roles: follower of Jesus / family man (roles have expanded within this) / friend / learner / innovator, instigator, and agitator / giver and philanthropist

Your Narrative

Today's episode is brought to you by... The Payton Group! Patrick started this company following his retirement from pastoring, he wanted to bring his experience and expertise to the business world of someone who could look at their business with a fresh set of eyes and tell them the truth. The Payton Group is a leader in concierge coaching, consulting, and even counseling to equip you to become your best 'you' to lead your team into their best future.If you're interested in what we do at The Payton Group, email us: patrick@paytongroupllc.com, or call/text: 432-230-2425This word is misunderstood or overused in most circles: purpose.Benjamin Franklin said there are three things that are very hard: steel, a diamond, and to know one's self."Of all the minds of treasure, one's own self is the last to be dug up." —Friedrich NietzchePurpose can become an unnecessary mystery. Your purpose, your company's purpose—it can often get lost in competing self-interests. We confuse purpose with desires and dreams, wants and ambitions. We confuse purpose with:What we deeply want to do or accomplishGain (and we confuse financial gain/loss with being on or off our 'purpose')Business ambitions and goalsBelieving there are multiple purposes in lifeThere's really only one purpose that should drive everything, and it's at the core of what we are designed, called, and gifted to be."Life's most persistent and urgent question is 'what are you doing for others?'." —Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr."True greatness, true leadership is found in giving yourself to service to others. Not in coaxing or inducing others to serve you. True service is never without a cost. We must aim to put more into life than we take out." —J. Oswald Sanders"I experience more joy and discover more happiness in my life when I stop trying to get what I want and start helping others get what they need and want.""One of the outstanding ironies of history is the utter disregard of rank and title in the final judgment that men pass on each other. The final estimate of men shows that history cares not an iota for the rank of title a man has bore or the office he has held, but only the quality of his deeds and the character of his mind." —Samuel BrinkleExcerpt from Servant Leadership, by Robert GreenleafWe have taught people to manage instead of teaching them to lead and to serve.What am I ultimately after in my endeavors? The journey begins here.

Purpose

Dr. Henry P. Barham | BioPhenomune.comPhenomune | Research ArticlesPublished article, May 2021, JAMA NetworkWashington Post article if you don't already have a login, you'll need to create a free account to read the article  

Interview: Dr. Henry P. Barham

Interested in sponsorships with No Neutral Moments? Email us!patrick@paytongroupllc.comjessi@paytongroupllc.comSpiritual Leadership, by J. Oswald SandersLeaders are readers! Reading is critical to personal development.Chapter 13: The Leader and ReadingWhy should we read?We read to refill the wells of inspiration in our life. Bacon: "Read not to contradict or to confute, nor to believe and take for granted, nor to find talk in discourse. Read in order to weigh and consider." Read to think. To meditate. To be challenged. We read for the benefit of our soul/holistic benefit to ourselvesWe read for intellectual growthWe read to learn how to speak and write betterWe read to acquire new information to keep up and stay well informed in our field of expertiseWe read to have fellowship with great minds (discern and determine if what you're reading is from a great mind)A good book has great power. Sometimes we equate quantity of reading with quality of reading, and often times there are a smaller number of books that actually have great impact.What should we read?"If a man is known by the company he keeps, so also his character is reflected in the books he reads. A leader's reading is the outward expression of his inner aspirations. The vast number of titles pouring from presses today makes discriminating choice essential. We can afford to read only the best, only that which invigorates our mission. Our reading should be regulated by who we are and what we intend to accomplish." (p. 104).the Payton rule on biographies: avoid biographies of those who are alive; memoirs are a bit different, and biographies tend to lean towards wisdom and lessons (historical founders, founders of faith, classic biographies)How should we read?"Unless our reading includes serious thinking, it is wasted time." (p. 106)If it barely has your interest, don't waste your time. Don't read to forget.Use the same discrimination in choosing books as in choosing friends.Read with pencil and notebook in hand to take notes; examples: highlights on digital, writing in the margin, highlighting, utilizing other note taking options, like Evernote or other appsHave a 'commonplace book' to record what is striking, interesting, and worth of second thoughtVerify historical, scientific, and other dataLook up unknown wordsVary your reading to keep your mind out of a rut. Variety!Correlate your reading—history with poetry, biography with historical novel. Example: if reading history, find a person you find interesting during that period and read a biographyBand of Brothers, by Stephen Ambrose 

The Leader and Reading

Today's episode is brought to you by Luchini & Mertz Land Surveying Co., a resilient business on a mission to faithfully serve clients & empower employees—all the while, building lifelong relationships through the art, science, and process of land surveying. In business since 1952, Luchini & Mertz is known for their dedication to clients and their customer service. Contact Bobby Burkholder for your surveying needs: bobbyb@luchinimertz.comWhat are your roles? Here are mine:Follower of JesusFamily man (husband, father, and now father-in-law, grandfather...)Friend (more than an acquaintance)Learner (know more in order to do more)Leader (engage deeply or not engage at all)Teacher/CommunicatorInnovator, Instigator, AgitatorVisionary (believe what I see and act on it; boldly believe)Competitor/AthleteGiver/PhilanthropistGoals are lined up with values and also with roles.5 Ways to Define Your RolesClarify and prioritize your roles.Live out your roles appropriately (roles should fit into your positions that you hold).Claim lost roles.Let go of some labels that you've allowed to settle in as roles.Be prepared to make changes to operate in your roles (pruning decisions; rarely about adding but typically about subtracting).Book recommendations for this episode:The Path of Least Resistance, by Robert FritzThe Highway to Leadership, by Margaret SlatteryWe would love to connect with you!Patrick: patrick@paytongroupllc.comJessi: jessi@paytongroupllc.com

Roles

Thank you to our sponsors for today's episode!Luchini & Mertz:Today's episode is brought to you by Luchini & Mertz Land Surveying Co., a resilient business on a mission to faithfully serve clients & empower employees—all the while, building lifelong relationships through the art, science, and process of land surveying. In business since 1952, Luchini & Mertz is known for their dedication to clients and their customer service. Contact Bobby Burkholder for your surveying needs: bobbyb@luchinimertz.comAdmarc:The foundation of a product or company is its logo. Along with your brand identity it shapes how people define your company. For over three decades Admarc has designed logos for companies small and large across the Permian Basin and the country. After all, your identity is by design.Visit Admarc online at admarc.com or email Darrell, darrell@admarc.comCan't Hurt Me, by David Goggins (warning! this book contains expletives and harsh language): "Are you willing to explore the possibilities of who you can truly become?"Look at the possibilities in your: Faith, Family, Friends, Finances, Fitness, Servant-LeadershipTwo groups: 1) non-competitive and softer and 2) competitive and fairly intenseThe Path of Least Resistance, by Robert FritzWe can intentionally push into what it takes for us to be better. To become better, we have to continually work towards being better and explore the possibilities of what we can truly become.As a coach and consultant, I am struck by the lack of intentionality to pursuing 'better', and there is a lack of intentionality to fighting what has become our status quo.Why is it so hard for us to press into becoming better?We don't plan for the exploration of possibilities, therefore, we are afraid of the exploration.We allow ourselves to become (or to be) constitutionally weak and afraid of challenge. It's much easier to settle than it is to be comfortable with drive.We believe it will distract us from the good that we already do.We think we are as good as we can get. The older we get (as people and companies), this is very easy to slip in to.We know how hard we worked to get to where we are, and we know how hard it will be to get to the next level. Our tendency is to get to a place where we are successful, and then we try to protect it.Are you willing to think about (and do something about) how much better you can be? Are you willing to create and recreate yourself to become what you're designed, called, and gifted to be? This takes effort.  This is not a motivational speech. This is just a gut-check. You don't get anywhere by motivation, you get there by determination.Good to Great, by Jim Collins

Consider the Possibilities

Thank you to our sponsors for today's episode!Luchini & Mertz:Today's episode is brought to you by Luchini & Mertz Land Surveying Co., a resilient business on a mission to faithfully serve clients & empower employees—all the while, building lifelong relationships through the art, science, and process of land surveying. In business since 1952, Luchini & Mertz is known for their dedication to clients and their customer service. Contact Bobby Burkholder for your surveying needs: bobbyb@luchinimertz.comAdmarc:The foundation of a product or company is its logo. Along with your brand identity it shapes how people define your company. For over three decades Admarc has designed logos for companies small and large across the Permian Basin and the country. After all, your identity is by design.Visit Admarc online at admarc.com or email Darrell, darrell@admarc.com---Don't go back as if nothing has happened, because something has happened to all of us. No one has been unchanged by this experience, whether personally or professionally.How we have been changed:Assumptions and judgments based on actions of othersA worldwide shutdown of all that is normal lifeGlobally affected for an extended period of timeFear-based livingFaith: who or what you put your trust inFamily: what have you discovered that you want to hang on to?Fitness: physical, mental, emotionalFriends: better, worse? Finances: what lessons have we learned? Drastic? Tragic?Servant Leadership: what you have learned about seeing and serving others? What is your capacity to care?Business: workplace, relationships in the workplace, discipline (or lack of) in the workplace; what about your employees? What are you going to change in order to leverage what you've learned during COVID?What are you going to appreciate more post-COVID?

Don't Go Back

Today's episode is brought to you by Admarc:The foundation of a product or company is its logo. Along with your brand identity it shapes how people define your company. For over three decades Admarc has designed logos for companies small and large across the Permian Basin and the country. After all, your identity is by design.Visit Admarc online at admarc.com or email Darrell, darrell@admarc.com Leadershift, by John Maxwell (nimble, adaptable, and flexible)1. ThinkIn the thinking process, we should always be reading as much as we can get our hands on. Read books about history so you can put things in historical context. Research, journal, discuss.2. PlanPlanning involves writing things down and objectifying what you're going to try to do. Planning involves what you're going to measure.3. Act Try it, test it, measure it, execute it. Get after it! Never commit to do everything but always commit to experiment with everything.4. AdjustYou have to do this with discipline, and adjustment has to go back around to thinking, planning, and acting. Sometimes you keep, sometimes you cancel. You always adjust so you can get to the objective.MindStyles, Dr. Anthony Gregorc (not a personality test or assessment but how you take in information and what you do with that information) / email Patrick (patrick@paytongroupllc) to find out more about MindStyles for your business.Reflection Ministries: website or contact: info@reflectionministriestx.org

The Process

Interested in sponsorship opportunities? Email patrick@paytongroupllc.com for more info and rates!Leadership In Turbulent Times, by Doris Kearns GoodwinThe 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, by Steven R. Covey"Leadership is influence; nothing more, nothing less." John Maxwell1. Value/Goodwin: Acknowledge when failed policies demand a change in direction.Covey: Shifting your paradigm*policies = efforts, strategies, plans2. Value/Goodwin: Gather firsthand information and then ask questions (as well as understanding the emotional needs of each member of the team). Set a standard of mutual respect and dignity. Be accessible and easy to approach.Covey: Seek first to understand before being understood. Practice win-win situations.3. Value/Goodwin: Find time and space to think.Covey: Sharpen the saw.4. Value/Goodwin: Exhaust the possibilities for compromise before imposing unilateral decisions/executive power.Covey: Working with a win-win mindset, seeking synergy, creative compromiseYou should know your people well enough to somewhat know their response before you bring things forward.Always shield your team/colleagues from blame.Go back to point 1; acknowledge if the policy has failed.5. Value/Goodwin: Refuse to let past resentments fester; transcend personal vendettas.Covey: Begin with the end in mind. You'll get where you going with people and not through people, and you set them free without holding grudges.6. Value/Goodwin: Maintain perspective in the face of both accolades and abuse.Know who you are, what you stand for, and where you're going.Where does your identity lie? Is it secure?Covey: Creating a personal vision of humility.Maintain perspective. Be cautious of social media exposure, and watch how you read and respond to emails.7. Value/Goodwin: Keep your word.Covey: Putting first things first.8. Value/Goodwin: Know when to hold back, and know when to move forward.Covey: Begin with the end in mind. Think win-win.In moving forward, you have to apply the rest of these principles. These will help you know when to hold back and when to move forward.9. Value/Goodwin: Balance transactional and transformational.Covey: Paradigms of Interdependence; synergizeYou're not always wheeling and dealing.We live in a culture where most things are transactional and not big-picture transformational.

Lincoln Values

Notes and Fragrance

Questions, suggestions, or thoughts on the podcast? Email Patrick: patrick@paytongroupllc.comCitizenship in a Republic, by Theodore Rooseveltdelivered at the Sorbonne, Paris, France, April 23, 1910

Fight Like Hell

Interested in sponsorship? Have ideas for the show? Email Patrick: patrick@paytongroupllc.comCome join us on Instagram: @noneutralmoments_New podcast recommendation: The Maximized LifestyleCheck them out on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify, and Amazon!Do not fear disagreement but rather mine it out to get what is best for all. The process of getting better always goes through friction and pruning.Covey: seek to understand before seeking to be understood.I do not mind if someone disagrees with me if they disagree with respect toward my views. There is not even respect towards one another right now. Benefits of Disagreement:Exposes our prejudices, blind spots, and oversightsForces challenge to my paradigms and systems of thought and actionForces me to see if I truly respect with the one with whom I disagree (and vice versa)Forces me to think and decide if what I think I think is really what I think (let my thought processes me challenged)Refines all of the aboveThe greatest challenge of disagreement is pride.Practices for Healthy Disagreement:Encourage others to disagree with youBe cautiousBe compassionateBe courageous

The Power of Disagreements

Have questions for us or suggestions for future episodes? Want to get some more information on sponsorship opportunities? Email patrick@paytongroupllc.com or reach out to us on Instagram: @noneutralmoments_Eisenhower referred to the extreme left and reactive right.Synergy: working together towards solutions that we could not come to separately.The answer is not in everyone agreeing to one side or the other.It doesn’t mean you have to compromise your convictions but it does mean you have to find a way to live together.

Navigating Extremes

*Please see the excerpt below for a clarification on Lesson 9 regarding Shaun White.Email Patrick for sponsorship information: patrick@paytongroupllc.comNote taking app: EvernotePaper planner: Franklin Planner2020 Audit / 12 Lessons from 2020:Write your plans in pencilRemember the 3 Circles (Concern, Influence, Trust) adapted from Steven CoveyRushed or hurried and ‘right now’ are rarely rightCrisis always reveals character and conviction (so welcome the crisis/test)Find coaches, mentors, and advisors; we all need them. Blind spots and your success can be dangerousThe greater your leadership load, the more valuable your time alone; therefore, plan for it.Keep practicing seeking to understand before demanding to be understood (The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Steven R. Covey; Habit 5)The 5 Plus 1 is still a good foundation (faith, family, friends, fitness, finances; plus 1: servant leadership) Servant Leadership by Robert Greenleaf*The Shaun White Rule works; Tools of Titans by Tim FerrissYou only control your thoughts, words, and actions; you cannot control other people.Read and keep reading, and read more and more about dead people.*In this episode, Patrick references the Shaun White interview in Tim Ferriss' Tools of Titans. Patrick paraphrases White's response to one of Ferriss' questions and mentions his wife and children; In the interview, White uses the word 'family' as he is not married and does not have children. We apologize for the inadvertent error and have included the excerpt below to clarify:---TF: What’s your self-talk just before dropping into an Olympic run?SW: “I say, ‘At the end of the day, who cares? What’s the big deal? I’m here, I’m going to try my best, and I’m going to go home, and my family’s there. . . . Even though my whole world’s wrapped up in this, who cares?’”TF: The “and I’m going to go home, and my family’s there” is a line he adopted from Andre Agassi, one of his mentors. Shaun and I both love and recommend Andre’s autobiography, Open.”

11 Lessons from 2020

Covering topics ranging from the five key categories of the Ideal Life, Servant Leadership, personal growth and interesting topics, and maybe even a little social commentary is thrown in as well!

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No Neutral Moments

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