Plan A Happy Life

Love languages, personality types and multiple intelligences

Today we chat about the benefits of stepping out of your comfort zone!Routines build habits and habits can be extremely helpful when trying to introduce new behaviors into your daily life.  However, as with most things, the magic lies somewhere in the middle. Too rigid...you miss out on all the potential that spontaneity or trying something new can bring.  Too "loosey goosey", with no self-discipline and you’ll never get anything accomplished. You may be the life of the party, up for anything, all the time but your life may also get a bit out of control.Trying new things is really scary for a lot of people.  Why?FEAR or fear of failure - humans actually fear an unknown outcome more than they do a negative or bad one.  That helps explain why it’s so daunting for so many of us to try new things.  To just let go and try.  One of the best ways to combat the fear is to ask yourself, “What is the worst that could happen?”  Is the worst really that bad?  Bad enough to stop you from trying?Let’s look at the benefits of trying new things!You may discover new passions, interests or activities that you enjoyIt challenges you - keeps you sharp and you continue to learnIt feels good/ builds confidenceIIt gives you an new sense of appreciation and respect for other people that do or excel at that particular activity or thingIt keeps you flexible (not rigid) - (Definition: A person with a rigid personality is, as the word describes, inflexible. They find it very hard to understand and sometimes even acknowledge the perspectives, feelings, and ideas of other people) A really fun way to help make these new things come to life is to...CREATE A VISUAL BUCKET LIST! (combination of vision board and a bucket list)Step 1 - Decide the time frame for your bucket list. Is it for the spring? Is itfor the year? Step 2 - Decide what items will be on your bucket list. I like adding bothbig and small adventures. That way, when I’m looking for somethingto do, I have a lot of options. These can be anything you want, from bigtrips to simple things you want to do with your family and friends, or foryourself. For example, for my summer bucket list, I want to go kayaking,participate in a color run, take a fishing trip, and even try out a sensorydeprivation float tank. (That last one honestly has me a little freaked out,but I want to give it a try!)Step 3 - Create a way to track your bucket list. I like to use the Happy PlannerPage Protectors for this (the ones for 2x2 cards), but you can use whateverworks for you. I write out each item on my list on a 2x2 piece ofcardstock and slide them into the pockets.Step 4 - Find an image that represents that item. You can use a picture, magazineclippings, or an image from Pinterest or a Google search. I just tookscreenshots and that worked perfectly. Size your images to 2x2 (or whateversize you need) and trim. Step 5 - Put the list where you will see it and be inspired by it. That could beon your refrigerator, on your mirror, or on your desk. I keep mine in myplanner so I see it every day.Step 6 - When you check an item off your list, be sure to capture the momentwith a photo or selfie. You’ll be so glad you did. Add your photo to yourbucket list as a lovely reminder of dreams come true.We want to see your visual bucket lists! Follow and tag us on Instagram @planahappyplifepodCan't wait to see the new things you try!xo Steph & Kayla

Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone & Try Something New!

Today, we’re going to help you learn how to laugh at yourself by laughing at us…with us.  We share some of our most embarrassing moments, have a good laugh and then figure out if there is anything we can or should learn from our blooper reel.We talk about falling down, peeing our pants, getting turned down by Justin Bieber and embarrassing old videos.Remember you don’t always have to be/look “cool”! So take those cringey moments and turn them into memories that you can look back and laugh at.Why do we get embarrassed?According to researchers, most of the embarrassments that are encountered by people include instances of tripping and falling, spilling drinks, ripping pants, stalling cars, having one's private thoughts or feelings disclosed, accidental flatulence or belching, receiving undesired attention, and forgetting the names of others.Fear of judgement  - We oftentimes feel that people are walking around judging our every move and that can be really paralyzing. “Embarrassment is considered one of the self-conscious emotions, quite at ease in the company of guilt, shame, and pride.” – Dr. Mary Lamia – Psychology Today article          We hope that we made you laugh!xo Steph & Kayla

Don't Take Yourself So Seriously

Kindness is the way we show empathy for other people.Try to implement some of our kindness tips into your daily routine.Speak Kindly to yourself - Practice that positive self talk.Share an act of kindness - Do something for someone else.Forgive yourself or someone else.Give people the benefit of the doubt- Show compassion when there is a grey area.Say thank you! - Show appreciation!Compliment Someone.Smile & Say hi - It can make someone’s day.Pay it forward - Be a part of the kindness domino effect.Judge Less - Others & YOURSELFBe an encourager - Be someone’s cheerleader.Take the high road! “When they go low, we go high.” - Michelle Obama (YES!!!)No Gossiping - Don’t add to the drama. We are not perfect but by putting even just a few of these tips into practice we can make the world a better place! Let’s do it!xo Steph & Kayla

12 Ways To Be Kinder To Yourself & Others

**Cue the confetti and the happy music**We finally get to announce that Stephanie wrote a book! YAY! And of course... it's called Plan a Happy Life™: Define your passion, nurture your creativity and take hold of your dreams.Plan a Happy Life includes strategies, systems, and methods for getting organized, prioritizing what's most important to you, and living intentionally. Here you'll find great ideas for:Celebrating the ordinary (dance party in the kitchen, anyone?)Discovering new ways to serve others (that will fit into a busy schedule)Finding your happy even on the tougher daysMaking the most effective lists (hint: it involves stickers)Filling your life with gratitudeControlling your calendar so you can live each day fully--and colorfully! (a step-by-step guide)And much more happy planning (seriously, you have to plan fun in your life!)Make the most of your most valuable resource--time--and have a blast doing it with Plan a Happy Life.It's officially releasing on August 25th and is available for pre-order NOW! Find out where you can buy it now below.AMAZONBOOKS A MILLIONBARNES & NOBLECHRISTIANBOOK.COMAPPLE BOOKSWe hope you add this book to your collection and are able to use it as a tool to help Plan a Happy Life!xo Stephanie & Kayla

Steph's BIG News: "I wrote a book!"

During these uncertain times (COVID-19) it is easy to feel down and have a pessimistic attitude. BUT it is truly possible to change your outlook and choose the happy side! It may not change the challenges we face but the way we face them and how we choose to tackle them.These 3 incredible people who have lived before us are the epitome of optimism… in unfortunate - even tragic - situations. Their words are wise and true.NELSON MANDELA - South Africa’s first black president, Nobel Peace prize winner and anti-Apartheid icon.  Spent 27 years in prison.“I am fundamentally an optimist. Whether that comes from nature or nurture, I cannot say. Part of being optimistic is keeping one’s head pointed toward the sun, one’s feet moving forward. There were many dark moments when my faith in humanity was sorely tested, but I would not and could not give myself up to despair. That way lays defeat and death.” – Nelson Mandela“Everyone can rise above their circumstances and achieve success if they are dedicated to and passionate about what they do.” – Nelson Mandela“Do not judge me by my successes, judge me by how many times I fell down and got back up again.” – Nelson Mandela“When people are determined they can overcome anything.” – Nelson MandelaANNE FRANK – Diary of a Young Girl – She started her diary at the age of 13 while hiding from the Germans during WWII.  She hid for 2 years, writing all the while until she and her family were found and sent to Auschwitz…the infamous concentration/death camp.  She died before she was 16.  Her father, Otto, survived and published her diary.  “Think of all the beauty still left around you and be happy.” – Anne Frank“I've found that there is always some beauty left -- in nature, sunshine, freedom, in yourself; these can all help you.” – Anne Frank“I can’t imagine how anyone can say: ‘I’m weak’, and then remain so. After all, if you know it, why not fight against it, why not try to train your character?” – Anne Frank“We all live with the objective of being happy; our lives are all different and yet the same.” – Anne Frank HELEN KELLER – Author, activist and lecturer – Helen was left deaf, blind and mute as a result of an unknown illness at the age of 19 months. Her lifelong instructor and eventual companion, Anne Sullivan, taught Helen to communicate by spelling words with her hands, using sign language.  Helen couldn’t see, so she had to feel the hands of the person communicating with her.  The process was really difficult for her and as she recalls, she became extremely frustrated because she didn’t even know the words existed. On January 22, 1916, Keller and Sullivan traveled to the small town in Wisconsin to deliver a lecture at the Mabel Tainter Memorial Building. Details of her talk were provided in the weekly Dunn County News on January 22, 1916: A message of optimism, of hope, of good cheer, and of loving service was brought to Menomonie Saturday—a message that will linger long with those fortunate enough to have received it. When part of the account was reprinted in the January 20, 2016 edition of the paper under the heading "From the Files", the column compiler added According to those who attended, Helen Keller spoke of the joy that life gave her. She was thankful for the abilities that she did possess and stated that the most productive pleasures she had were curiosity and imagination. Keller also spoke of the joy of service and the happiness that came from doing things for others ... Keller imparted that "helping your fellow men were one's only excuse for being in this world and in the doing of things to help one's fellows lay the secret of lasting happiness." She also told of the joys of loving work and accomplishment and the happiness of achievement. Although the entire lecture lasted only a little over an hour, the lecture had a profound impact on the audience.  "When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us." – Helen Keller"I take happiness very seriously. It is a creed, a philosophy and an objective." – Helen Keller"Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement; nothing can be done without hope." – Helen Keller"Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadows." – Helen Keller"Many of us delude ourselves with the thought that if we could stand in the lot of our more fortunate neighbor, we could live better, happier and more useful lives…It is my experience that unless we can succeed in our present position, we could not succeed in any other." – Helen Keller“True happiness... is not attained through self-gratification, but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.” – Helen KellerWe hope this brings you a new optimistic outlook for life. We can do this!xo Stephanie & Kayla

Lessons From Historical Optimists

Today, we have a VERY special guest…Tyler Rahmatulla, Stephanie’s son and Kayla’s brother!Tyler is a husband, father of 3 boys (and another one on the way), and former professional baseball player. He played all through his childhood in to his adult years – from Mater Dei High School, UCLA and ultimately playing for the St. Louis Cardinals’ minor league teams. In this episode, he talks with us about the life of a collegiate and professional athlete and how it demands a mental toughness in order to be successful. Throughout Tyler’s baseball career he worked with some incredibly wise mentors, coaches and fellow athletes. Along the way he learned lessons of “mental toughness” that he put to use on the field and continues to implement in his daily life today.Among those mentors was Ken Ravizza, a sport psychologist, who played a major role in changing Tyler’s mental game for the better. He consulted with countless athletes and helped them reach peak performance - all starting with their mind. “Destructive little voices in your head are often fueled by destructive emotions. Try to turn off your emotions and think logically”- Ken RavizzaSome topics we cover:Confidence vs conceitPreparation / planningControl the controllablesBeing PresentTyler also hosts a podcast: The Brushback Baseball PodcastIt covers all things baseball, baseball, and more baseball. Tyler and co-host David Klein (avid Dodgers fan, stat memorizer, and semi-pro baseball historian) are at opposite ends of the baseball spectrum but use this dialog to share each unique perspective. They aim to share weekly discussions of MLB news, life/mindset of a ballplayer, the business side of baseball and interviews with players, coaches, and everybody in between.You can find them on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, & Instagram.Tyler's InstgramAnd because we can... A proud mom and little sister moment: Check out Tyler's home run mentioned in the episode here & here. xo Stephanie & Kayla

Developing Mental Toughness: Life lessons from the baseball field with Tyler Rahmatulla

 Everyone will experience this pandemic in their own unique way.  And that’s OK.  It’s up to each one of us to honor our feelings and in order to do that, we need to learn how to recognize what we are, in fact, feeling.   There is a pressure to be productive during our “safer at home” quarantine.  And for some, staying busy and learning new things is helpful and soothing.  But for many people, this is a time of fear, triggers, stress, lost jobs, uncertainty and learning a new language isn’t going to make them feel better.    ACCEPTANCE is giving power and attention to the things you can control and managing your expectations and feelings about things that you can’t. So, knowing what we now know about accepting these forces that we can’t control, what can we do to process this pandemic and social distancing?   Ask yourself these two questions on a daily basis:How or what am I feeling today? Learn to hone in on the emotions that you are experiencing.   There’s a great resource called the emotion wheel. Check it out here: Emotional WheelWhat do I need to do to take care of myself today?  Movement? Silence? Connection? Productivity? THIS is how we can navigate through this in a way that honors what we need!

Acceptance & The Two Most Important Questions To Ask Yourself During This Pandemic and Every Day!

Kara Elise is a chef, experience curator, and the ultimate hostess. She focuses on creating spaces and experiences that cultivate community. She builds events and experiences for both individuals and brands that create spaces for connection, process, and play. Along with her fiance Caleb, Kara curates Connect Dinners aimed at creating connection around mindful dinners for strangers. In addition, they host "Kara and Caleb- the podcast" which dives deep into the questions that have defined the lives of their guests. Kara currently teaches an online cheese board styling course and is working on filming a pilot for a cooking show. She loves bubble gum and Los Angeles, and loves helping others pursue what truly matters to them.___________________________________________________________We met Kara in June 2019 when she curated a brunch for a launch party we hosted for The Happy Planner brand... and we absolutely fell in love with her. Everything about her- her presence, talent and passion for connecting with others. Shortly after, we got to spend an incredible weekend at a creative retreat hosted by her and a mutual friend! When we started the podcast we knew we needed to get her on an episode so she could share her wisdom we so quickly came to admire.Today she shares where her passion for cooking stemmed from, hosting dinners for celebrities and curating experiences for people with the purpose of connecting with others! Plus how she met and built a business with her fiancé Caleb. Thank you Kara!You can find Kara at the links below for inspiration, amazing workshops and more!Kara's WebsiteKara's InstagramKara & Caleb's Podcastxo Stephanie & Kayla 

All About Connection with Kara Elise

Let's be real... how is "social distancing" going? If we are honest, we are struggling over here. Finding things to keep busy while productive; relax but not waste too much time. It's been tough!This pandemic is unlike anything we have seen in our lifetime. How can we remain positive yet realistic? So many uncertainties but we will get through this and come out stronger on the other side!WE GOT THIS! 

Social Distancing

In our lives there is SO much incoming!  Texts, calls, emails, DMs on IG and Facebook.  Invitations to birthdays, baby showers, school activities, games…all GOOD stuff!Here are some benefits that can come from solitude:Solitude increases productivitySolitude sparks creativity.Solitude helps you know yourself.Being alone gives you an opportunity to plan your life.Embrace and welcome solitude - It’s empowering and removes the fear of being alone.Builds Independence!Eventually, we all have to spend time alone.  We move out of our parents house, being single or divorced, friends or spouses are out of town or doing something else, we lose someone we love, our kids move out of the house (empty nesters), etc.  If we develop interests, hobbies and other things we like to do when we’re alone…the transitions are much easier.Here are a few ways to find the time to spend with YOU!Digital Detox - Let’s face it.  We all probably spend some time every day alone…but on our phones or online.  Try using that time to unplug and take a walk or open a notebook and just start writing.  It’s amazing where your mind goes when you just give it some space to think outside the box. Plan for it!  - Schedule time in your planner for doing something alone.Get up a little bit earlier - The morning is a great time for solitude.  It’s usually quieter and it can be a really powerful way to start your day to focus your energy and thoughts when your mind is rested and refreshed.Try this: This week, try scheduling some alone time to journal.  Your prompt: If you had and entire day alone, what would you do?

All By Myself - The Power of Alone Time

This week Stephanie and Kayla answer some commonly asked questions from their listeners. They cover the reality of working together as mother and daughter, favorite books, best skincare practices and more!

Q&A - Stephanie & Kayla answer listener questions!

Sometimes changing the way you think can make all the difference in the world. A trip to the emergency room was the perfect scenario for Stephanie to test the power of gratitude. She discusses her experience and how she was able to change her perspective and find the silver lining in this not-so-bright day.

Change Your Perspective, Change Your Life!

What would you do if you had more time?This week we are talking about how to stay productive so we can enjoy that things in life that we WANT to do.We all say "I don't have the time." When in reality we may not be making the time to do the things that we have been putting off. Yes - most lead a busy life, but that doesn't mean you can't also make time for good times.In order to do the things we want doesn't mean that we can just forget all the real, important and everyday tasks that need to get done (chores, work, errands, bills). Y'all we are all adults - they don't disappear...unfortunately.So, here are some tips for staying productive while also making the important fulfilling moments in life a priority!Make list - don't keep things in your head. Create a want-to-do and a need-to-do list.Make a plan- Physically write down in your planner or calendar one or more of the things on your "want to do list" (date night, family time, fun activity, vacation)Get specific...Pick a date and time and commit to making it happen. It is time to MAKE the time!Then, add the NEED to do items to your week/month while being mindful of the things you have finally made time forBe realistic with your time - don't set yourself up for failure by committing to too much, good or bad. You can only do so much within one day/week/month!Make your time productive, so you can fill your life with more of the good stuff.xo Stephanie & Kayla

What Would You Do If You Had More Time?

In this week’s episode we are asking ourselves AND you, Is it not okay to want more? What is the difference between contentment and complacency?Contentment : a state of happiness and satisfactionComplacency: an instance of usually unaware or uninformed self-satisfactionWe hear it all the time: “You were made for so much more.” or “It’s all about the hustle.” But what if that is not what you want? Just trying to keep up with our peers and make it look like we have it all can be exhausting. Am I right?Don't know where you fall on the map? Ask your self this question:Are you happy and satisfied with your life, job, etc?If yes, then don’t listen to the pressures of wanting more. Protect your peace. If you answered no, then keep going! The message of “you were made for so much more” is meant for you! You know where you want to go and will work hard to get there. You got this! Not sure? Then you have some exploring to do. Maybe journal about. Make a list. Go back to your Happy List! Your future self and life need to align with with the things that make you happy.  Moral of the story: if you want more than what you're currently getting from life, then go for it girl… BUT if you are content and fulfilled where you are then it’s 100% fine to not want more. Make sure you find your meaning and happiness in life and only then decide for yourself what your future holds.We are rooting for your either way!xo Stephanie & Kayla

Is It Okay To Not Want More?

Stephanie Fleming, happiness activist and the creative entrepreneur behind The Happy Planner, is here to help you (yes, you!) plan a happy life. Every week, Stephanie and her daughter Kayla tackle one approachable way you can bring a little more happiness into your relationships, career, home, and everyday life.

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Plan A Happy Life

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