Is your business in a rut? Is everyone showing up with “Non-Player Characters” energy? When you have an Organizational Depressive State, it can be hard to get out of it – or can it be as simple as one person, one change? Let’s discuss! Why is that important for business?  When you walk into a business and feel like your life force begins to immediately drain – like everyone is walking around with NPC (Non-Player Character) energy, it can feel like it’s impossible (or at least exhausting) to fix. But if just one person showed up with different energy, would that reset the tone? For someone to change things, they have to first notice they are being a Non-Player Character, and they have to care enough to make that change, which is part of the problem. It can feel like an Organizational Depressive State. Of course, positive energy can be sucked out of someone by an organization stuck in a rut as well. If someone comes in with positive energy, there’s a race to see whether that person’s energy makes positive changes, or whether that person’s energy gets beaten out of them. It’s a race to see if the person or the place wins. The energy you bring into a space can affect other people, and you can also be affected by other’s energy, if you allow it.  Other Resources Mentioned The Midnight Library by Matt Haig https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/52578297-the-midnight-library Free Guy (movie)  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X2m-08cOAbc What We Do in the Shadows (tv show) https://www.imdb.com/title/tt7908628/ What story do you want to tell? So, that's our story... now, we want to hear yours! Pull up a chair and join the conversation in our Facebook Group: bit.ly/shmsgroup OR...  Shoot us an email: talktous@soheresmystory.com Connect with @SHMSpodcast on Twitter: https://twitter.com/shmspodcast  Text the word STORY to 345345 to get access to bonus content and weekly episode delivery. Text 410-632-6894 to start a conversation with us.  Want to support us? Love this podcast? Please tell your friends, post about us, or take a moment to review us & subscribe on iTunes, Stitcher, or wherever you listen to the podcast!

So, Here's My Story...

Ep 226: Organizational Depressive State

How do you strike the balance between keeping things that you might not ever need, and getting rid of things that you might regret not having? Why is that important for business?  Having exactly what you need but nothing extra is a Nirvana that few can ever attain.  It might show up in the amount of stuff you have, in your processes, or even in your systems.  Even space can be hoarded – there is something about having more space that is associated with success, and something about downsizing (or right-sizing) space that feels like going backwards.  There is a trap of equating quantity of value and worrying you won’t have when you eventually need it. How do you decide what you keep and what you can get by without, and when does not having it become more of a problem than having it around? Perhaps we need a spring cleaning in business, not just for our stuff, but for the processes and systems we have.  What story do you want to tell? So, that's our story... now, we want to hear yours! Pull up a chair and join the conversation in our Facebook Group: bit.ly/shmsgroup OR...  Shoot us an email: talktous@soheresmystory.com Connect with @SHMSpodcast on Twitter: https://twitter.com/shmspodcast  Text the word STORY to 345345 to get access to bonus content and weekly episode delivery. Text 410-632-6894 to start a conversation with us.  Want to support us? Love this podcast? Please tell your friends, post about us, or take a moment to review us & subscribe on iTunes, Stitcher, or wherever you listen to the podcast!

Ep225: Hoarding and Hermione

Do you expect to be heard? Or do you just assume that how things are is how they have to be? Why is that important for business?  Do you have a say or a voice? Do you expect to be heard? If your whole experience in life is being heard, then it is more likely that is your expectation. If you are systematically and systemically overlooked, it doesn’t build the confidence to speak with authority about things.  Where can you start using your voice where you currently think you have no power? How do you start acting as if you have the authority? What story do you want to tell? So, that's our story... now, we want to hear yours! Pull up a chair and join the conversation in our Facebook Group: bit.ly/shmsgroup OR...  Shoot us an email: talktous@soheresmystory.com Connect with @SHMSpodcast on Twitter: https://twitter.com/shmspodcast  Text the word STORY to 345345 to get access to bonus content and weekly episode delivery. Text 410-632-6894 to start a conversation with us.  Want to support us? Love this podcast? Please tell your friends, post about us, or take a moment to review us & subscribe on iTunes, Stitcher, or wherever you listen to the podcast! 

Ep224: Do You Expect to Be Heard?

Like all good lessons about asking for what you need in business, this lesson starts in a massage parlor.  Why is that important for business?  You need to be aware of your needs (in business and in life) and communicate them effectively. Sometimes, when you are staring at a blank page, you just need to figure out what the first sentence should be and start from there.  There is nothing about work and leading that doesn’t involve identifying what is needed and asking for what is needed.  In the book, Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents, we learn there are internalizers and externalizers. A lot of conflict in teams comes down to friction between internalizers (non-direct communicators) and externalizers (more direct).  A lot of conflict in teams comes down to the friction between internalizers and externalizers (or direct and indirect people) and how they handle things.  What story do you want to tell? So, that's our story... now, we want to hear yours! Pull up a chair and join the conversation in our Facebook Group: bit.ly/shmsgroup OR...  Shoot us an email: talktous@soheresmystory.com Connect with @SHMSpodcast on Twitter: https://twitter.com/shmspodcast  Text the word STORY to 345345 to get access to bonus content and weekly episode delivery. Text 410-632-6894 to start a conversation with us.  Want to support us? Love this podcast? Please tell your friends, post about us, or take a moment to review us & subscribe on iTunes, Stitcher, or wherever you listen to the podcast! 

Ep223: Tight Glutes & Communicating Needs

When you find out you are riding with the descendent of a nationally acclaimed blind wrestler, you know you’re in for some stories. And it turns out, we can turn those stories into some business lessons! Why is that important for business?  There are interesting challenges to being blind when pursuing a sport like wrestling – it can be harder to see what’s coming, but you become very skilled at dealing with what’s in front of you. An honest understanding of your strengths and weaknesses, whether it’s in sport or in business, can mean all the difference in how you perform.  There are also lessons to be learned in regards to hiring – what assumptions are you making about your needs – maybe in terms of education or experience – that aren’t actually necessary to find the best candidate. In either case, whether hiring someone or dealing with your own perceived weaknesses, you need confidence to see the path that isn’t obvious to everyone. When you can see further than other people can, it can be frustrating to be underestimated or misunderstood. But if you want to forge a path that not every other person has plodded down, you’ll have to get used to being misunderstood and slowing down your thought process to explain things over and over again. There is a set of luggage that comes with being able to see things others can’t.   What story do you want to tell? So, that's our story... now, we want to hear yours! Pull up a chair and join the conversation in our Facebook Group: bit.ly/shmsgroup OR...  Shoot us an email: talktous@soheresmystory.com Connect with @SHMSpodcast on Twitter: https://twitter.com/shmspodcast  Text the word STORY to 345345 to get access to bonus content and weekly episode delivery. Text 410-632-6894 to start a conversation with us.  Want to support us? Love this podcast? Please tell your friends, post about us, or take a moment to review us & subscribe on iTunes, Stitcher, or wherever you listen to the podcast! 

Ep222: Wrestling with Adversity

We don't talk about endings enough, especially not ending things well, with as much celebration as we began them. And that is exactly what this episode is about. Why is that important for business?  Consider ending your business, or a product line, or even a relationship with a client or a team member – are you putting in the same effort to make a beautiful ending as you did when you started? Instead of ending by tapering off into a fizzling nothingness, celebrate everything that was; end with as much joy as you started with. Just because something is ending, doesn’t mean it was a failure; endings aren’t inherently bad. That is the belief that allows people to hold onto things they shouldn’t. In public speaking, there are two aspects of the talk of particular import: primacy and recency. Primacy is the first thing you say, and it is what will be remembered. But recency, the last thing you said, is equally as memorable. So when considering how you want to be remembered, or how you want your business to be remembered, consider both the beginning and the end.  It is also important to remember that quitting is an art. We often have weird hang-ups around ending things or quitting things. But we need to allow endings to be thinkable, to be okay. If the possibility of an ending is unthinkable, you shut down so many options. It doesn’t have to be sad or wrong to say “this is done”; it is important to know when the last brush stroke has been applied to the painting. But take just as much care with the final brush strokes as you did with the rest, or your work may be ruined.  This also applies to letting someone go.  “The time has come for us to help you succeed somewhere else.” Paul Ricks When someone is not a right fit, love them enough to not let them stay somewhere they don’t shine. Help them find where they belong and let them leave as a valued member of the team. Put as much effort into that ending as you did with the onboarding.  What story do you want to tell? So, that's our story... now, we want to hear yours! Pull up a chair and join the conversation in our Facebook Group: bit.ly/shmsgroup OR...  Shoot us an email: talktous@soheresmystory.com Connect with @SHMSpodcast on Twitter: https://twitter.com/shmspodcast  Text the word STORY to 345345 to get access to bonus content and weekly episode delivery. Want to support us? Love this podcast? Please tell your friends, post about us, or take a moment to review us & subscribe on iTunes, Stitcher, or wherever you listen to the podcast! 

Ep221: Replay - The Art of Finishing Well

Whether it’s politics, sports or happy hour, sometimes your company culture can make others feel uncomfortable. At what point do you make changes to include people, and at what point is that watering down an important aspect of your culture? Why is that important for business?  In the office, sometimes cultures develop that can be polarizing. How do you handle it when new people come into conflict with the existing culture? How does diversity of thought and perspective reconcile with not wanting to break what works? There is a whole new social ritual happening now in offices, and it requires a new skill set of empathy.  What story do you want to tell? So, that's our story... now, we want to hear yours! Pull up a chair and join the conversation in our Facebook Group: bit.ly/shmsgroup OR...  Shoot us an email: talktous@soheresmystory.com Connect with @SHMSpodcast on Twitter: https://twitter.com/shmspodcast  Text the word STORY to 345345 to get access to bonus content and weekly episode delivery. Text 410-632-6894 to start a conversation with us.  Want to support us? Love this podcast? Please tell your friends, post about us, or take a moment to review us & subscribe on iTunes, Stitcher, or wherever you listen to the podcast!

Ep220: Diversity of Thought vs. Culture

Your company culture, a new board game, and all the ways they relate. Why is that important for business?  A new board game allows people to make choices that would benefit everyone. And more people were interested in taking that choice – to advance the game for everyone – instead of just progressing closer to the ultimate goal of winning. People who played the game chose collaboration over playing simply for the objective of winning. Which makes us think about company culture.   What are the other strategies and ways that you can create a company culture, realizing that your department can’t win at the expense of other people at the company? If you aren’t aware of this, you can easily accidentally incentivize the wrong behaviors.  It’s also important that the rules – of the game or the culture – not be arbitrary and make natural sense. This requires a full understanding of the “if-then” – it requires a lot of transparency.  Other resources mentioned Wingspan game: https://stonemaiergames.com/games/wingspan/ What story do you want to tell? So, that's our story... now, we want to hear yours! Pull up a chair and join the conversation in our Facebook Group: bit.ly/shmsgroup OR...  Shoot us an email: talktous@soheresmystory.com Connect with @SHMSpodcast on Twitter: https://twitter.com/shmspodcast  Text the word STORY to 345345 to get access to bonus content and weekly episode delivery. Text 410-632-6894 to start a conversation with us.  Want to support us? Love this podcast? Please tell your friends, post about us, or take a moment to review us & subscribe on iTunes, Stitcher, or wherever you listen to the podcast! 

Ep219: Board Games & Company Culture

Culture – whether in your business or in your family – isn’t just established in big picture planning. It is established in the little decisions that you make all the time about what’s important to you in the moment.  Why is that important for business?  Sometimes in business, we make lists of our values and try to establish a culture around that. But often it is the small moments – where we have to make decisions about what really matters in that moment – that create culture. What you prioritize doesn’t always exist on a big sheet of paper somewhere, but it shows up in the little decisions you make.  If you don’t like your culture, look at those decisions. Look at what values they transmit. It is in those moments that you are accidentally or intentionally creating culture.  What story do you want to tell? So, that's our story... now, we want to hear yours! Pull up a chair and join the conversation in our Facebook Group: bit.ly/shmsgroup OR...  Shoot us an email: talktous@soheresmystory.com Connect with @SHMSpodcast on Twitter: https://twitter.com/shmspodcast  Text the word STORY to 345345 to get access to bonus content and weekly episode delivery. Text 410-632-6894 to start a conversation with us.  Want to support us? Love this podcast? Please tell your friends, post about us, or take a moment to review us & subscribe on iTunes, Stitcher, or wherever you listen to the podcast!

Ep218: Little Decisions Lead to Big Culture

Feel like you’re languishing right now in these uncertain times? Let’s talk about reframing that experience a bit.  Why is that important for business?  There is a lot of uncertainty in the world and in business right now – lots of things are changing and many people feel unsettled and unmoored, or even like they are languishing.  A recent episode of Hidden Brain, featuring Anthony Burrow, focused on this experience: “A lot of the identity contingencies – the way in which we think of ourselves - are interwoven into the everyday life experiences, and so the school relationships, the work relationships, close family, friends, etc, when those things end or are coming to an end, you might start to wonder: “who am I? What am I going to do today?” Languishing isn’t just a description, a sort of wallowing or a float in a pool. It is an attempt to describe a whole set of affective emotional, behavioural circumstances of simply not feeling engaged in one’s life. There’s a sort of disconnection. And so if you are in this sort of place, whereas I’ve experienced it, where you can’t fully make sense of up or down, heads or tails because you’re languishing, you can’t keep score of how to move forward and get more of what you want and less of what you don’t like. You’re sort of floating in the wind.” Maybe being unsettled isn’t this terrible place to be. Perhaps it’s more like gears changing – in order to move up or down a gear, you have to hit the clutch to disengage. Only then can you re-engage in the new gear. Disconnection can be purposeful to help you get your gear shift into the right place, reconfigure and re-engage.  Of course, uncertain futures can be either something to dread, or something to feel hopeful about. Like Red did in Shawshank Redemption: “I think it's the excitement only a free man can feel. A free man at a start of a long journey whose conclusion is uncertain.” He was looking at what could be added to his life. But for many of us, it’s been a long time since we felt like our uncertain futures weren’t going to be taking away. Regardless, it can be helpful to rewrite the story of languishing as some sort of depressive state, into a purposeful disconnection so that you can reorganize things in a direction that you really want them to be.  What story do you want to tell? So, that's our story... now, we want to hear yours! Pull up a chair and join the conversation in our Facebook Group: bit.ly/shmsgroup OR...  Shoot us an email: talktous@soheresmystory.com Connect with @SHMSpodcast on Twitter: https://twitter.com/shmspodcast  Text the word STORY to 345345 to get access to bonus content and weekly episode delivery. Text 410-632-6894 to start a conversation with us.  Want to support us? Love this podcast? Please tell your friends, post about us, or take a moment to review us & subscribe on iTunes, Stitcher, or wherever you listen to the podcast! 

Ep217: Languishing Between Gears

There are a lot of logistics to consider in coming back to work, but one thing you might not be thinking about is the change to community. Does community still matter, and how will it look different in a post-COVID world? Why is that important for business?  There are ripple effects to this isolation. The next phase of business evolution, post-COVID, will look different in terms of building community, and it’s worth considering what that will look like. We have been talking policy, but we haven’t considered what else might be missing. And it maybe won’t feel as “community-ish” as it once did. It might require us to work harder and look farther or deeper to fulfill that connection need. And there may be things we got used to during isolation that we don’t want to give up in order to gain that community.  We may have been perfectly fine when we thought of quarantine as temporary. But when we realize we don’t know what “normal is going to be, it can be a bit more disconcerting. Things begin to feel more permanent, like we might become a society that just doesn’t get together in person.  Maybe we just need espresso shots of community to take us through our time on screens.   This is an unfolding experience with more questions than answers.  Community is important. It matters because it creates a space for conversation or connections that don’t otherwise have a chance to be. But maybe, as Smokey Robinson said, “a taste of honey is worse than none at all”. What story do you want to tell? So, that's our story... now, we want to hear yours! Pull up a chair and join the conversation in our Facebook Group: bit.ly/shmsgroup OR...  Shoot us an email: talktous@soheresmystory.com Connect with @SHMSpodcast on Twitter: https://twitter.com/shmspodcast  Text the word STORY to 345345 to get access to bonus content and weekly episode delivery. Text 410-632-6894 to start a conversation with us.  Want to support us? Love this podcast? Please tell your friends, post about us, or take a moment to review us & subscribe on iTunes, Stitcher, or wherever you listen to the podcast! 

Ep216: A Taste of Community

What if trying new things was like football training camp, and you had an audience – and even media – present while you were trying to figure things out? Wish you had time to practice something new in private instead? Maybe it’s not as simple as one or the other.  Why is that important for business?  To be successful in business, we need to give people the freedom to try and fail and evolve. And it would be nice to be able to do that in private. But there is also the danger that you can get stuck in a “getting ready to be ready” place. So how do you practice in a lower stakes environment that still matters enough so that you can evolve?  You are not going to be able to own your new skill until you experience it. No words that can replace the feeling of doing stuff. But you also need to discern where it’s time to graduate and up your game. As Ira Glass talks about in this video, you know what good is, but when you start, you are aware that you aren’t that. You have to play through that gap. If you don’t recognize that that gap is supposed to be there, you might practice in that quiet place forever.  And while it’s perfectly acceptable to slowly get your feet wet instead of jumping directly into the deep end, you still have to build your confidence through action. Confidence can only come through action.  In business, it needs to be okay to fail. Some lessons can only be learned the hard way, and you need to expect that. If you don’t find ways to move forward, then you risk staying stuck exactly where you are.  The price that you pay to satisfy the need to get better is the risk of embarrassment.  What story do you want to tell? So, that's our story... now, we want to hear yours! Pull up a chair and join the conversation in our Facebook Group: bit.ly/shmsgroup OR...  Shoot us an email: talktous@soheresmystory.com Connect with @SHMSpodcast on Twitter: https://twitter.com/shmspodcast  Text the word STORY to 345345 to get access to bonus content and weekly episode delivery. Text 410-632-6894 to start a conversation with us.  Want to support us? Love this podcast? Please tell your friends, post about us, or take a moment to review us & subscribe on iTunes, Stitcher, or wherever you listen to the podcast! 

Ep215: Practice, Risk & The Necessity of Failure

Ever have to muster the energy to do something you don’t want to do, but really should do? How do you change your energy? And how do you know when it’s a losing battle? Why is that important for business?  What do you do when things just are not working? How far do you push a lack of energy? Sometimes, when you have to make it work, changing your environment can totally shift your energy – it’s like layering other colours into the fabric.  You can also change the rules to match the energy - shuffle the deck for how you are going to accomplish the thing you can’t put off. Just start by asking, “what can I change about this?”  And sometimes, simply getting started helps, What story do you want to tell? So, that's our story... now, we want to hear yours! Pull up a chair and join the conversation in our Facebook Group: bit.ly/shmsgroup OR...  Shoot us an email: talktous@soheresmystory.com Connect with @SHMSpodcast on Twitter: https://twitter.com/shmspodcast  Text the word STORY to 345345 to get access to bonus content and weekly episode delivery. Text 410-632-6894 to start a conversation with us.  Want to support us? Love this podcast? Please tell your friends, post about us, or take a moment to review us & subscribe on iTunes, Stitcher, or wherever you listen to the podcast! 

Ep214: Pushing Through

REPLAY OF EPISODE 75: Audience Q&As can quickly devolve. Someone wants to share a story instead of a question; someone else wants to demonstrate their own expertise and “teach from the seats”. No one seems to know how to ask a succinct and relevant question and you can feel the frustration from the group. As the leader – whether it be in front of a large audience or just at your staff meetings – you must consider the impact of these contributions on the room, and your goals.  This episode is about being clear on your objective and helping everyone make the best contributions possible. It’s also a little bit about Jodi’s terrible poker face.   Why is that important for business?  There are people who are always going to answer, regardless of the question, with the answer they want to give. It can feel like they are not taking responsibility for the care and feeding of the group, nor considering the impact to the group.  As the leader, it is important to frame the rules of contribution before asking people for their contributions. For example, instructing them that the first sentence should end in a question mark. Give the Processors in the group time to think about what they want to say, and how to frame it within the guidelines you have given them. Set the expectations early.  However, it is also important to recognize that there are things that can get stuck in people’s craw, things they need to be acknowledged before they can move on. You don’t have to let this get you off track, but you do have to deal with the pothole in the parking lot, or it will keep coming up all day long.  Leadership is key here, and will affect the happiness of your team, and retention. You need to be clear on your top priority in the moment. Is it to keep train on the track, or is it to surface new thoughts and ideas? Are you trying to assuage concerns or present information? Each priority needs a different style of leadership. And you need to periodically asses if your leadership is angling you towards the outcome you want.  What story do you want to tell? So, that's our story... now, we want to hear yours! Pull up a chair and join the conversation in our Facebook Group: bit.ly/shmsgroup OR...  Shoot us an email: talktous@soheresmystory.com Connect with @SHMSpodcast on Twitter: https://twitter.com/shmspodcast  Text the word STORY to 345345 to get access to bonus content and weekly episode delivery. Want to support us? Love this podcast? Please tell your friends, post about us, or take a moment to review us & subscribe on iTunes, Stitcher, or wherever you listen to the podcast!

Ep213: Replay - Hijacked Meetings

Have you ever found yourself saying “I’m going to regret this”, but doing it anyway? Let’s talk self-sabotage and the frustrating world of pregrets.  Why is that important for business?  Often, we think too much about the consequences of making a bad decision, and not nearly enough about the consequences of making no decision. The decisions made through indecision/lack of a decision have consequences that we often ignore – sometimes they set a precedent, or simply waste a lot of time and energy.  And then there’s the part of it that isn’t about the decision at all, but how you communicate the decision.  So why do we do this? Are we just broken, or is it a glitch in the human operating system? Some of it might be because we can fatigue the pre-frontal cortex, which assesses consequences and manages a lot of decision making. And then we find our Monday selves really hating our Friday selves.  What story do you want to tell? So, that's our story... now, we want to hear yours! Pull up a chair and join the conversation in our Facebook Group: bit.ly/shmsgroup OR...  Shoot us an email: talktous@soheresmystory.com Connect with @SHMSpodcast on Twitter: https://twitter.com/shmspodcast  Text the word STORY to 345345 to get access to bonus content and weekly episode delivery. Text 410-632-6894 to start a conversation with us.  Want to support us? Love this podcast? Please tell your friends, post about us, or take a moment to review us & subscribe on iTunes, Stitcher, or wherever you listen to the podcast! 

Ep212: Indecision & PREgrets

So, Here's My Story... is the only business podcast that promises wildly useful lessons from the absurd, the poignant and the seemingly irrelevant. This project arose out of a burning hatred of bullet point blogs, canned solutions and highlight-reel business conversations that look nothing like the realities of leadership. Business is messy and unpredictable. Business has depth and nuance. Business is more than spreadsheets. Business is stories.

hubhopper

So, Here's My Story...

hubhopper