The elite members of the Premier League react with fury at the takeover of Newcastle United Football Club. As crisis talks begin between clubs and league, Ashwood City are unexpectedly asked along to attend the high level meeting.Paul Waggott as Patrick NolanAdam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' WoodallHelena Doughty as Jess TateEpisode written by:Joel EmeryEdited by:Adam Jarrell and Joel EmeryDirected by:Adam Jarrell Executive Producer:Joel EmeryWith thanks to:The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholderswww.patreon.com/ashwoodcityWARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.Listener discretion is advised.The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

The Offensive

Episode 126 - Extreme Takeover

Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan and Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall join one another on the road for back-to-back Premier League away games at Leeds United and Watford.Paul Waggott as Patrick NolanAdam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' WoodallEpisode written by:Joel EmeryEdited by:Adam JarrellDirected by:Adam Jarrell Executive Producer:Joel EmeryWith thanks to:The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholderswww.patreon.com/ashwoodcityWARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.Listener discretion is advised.The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Episode 125 - Driving Miss Diesel

As Ashwood City's form improves, Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall secures a new First Team Coach to work under Head Coach Sven-Goran Eriksson. Paul Waggott as Patrick NolanAdam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' WoodallHelena Doughty as Jess TateAnt McGinley as David HallJohn Brannoch as Colin WalshEpisode written by:Joel EmeryEdited by:Adam JarrellDirected by:Adam Jarrell Executive Producer:Joel EmeryWith thanks to:The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholderswww.patreon.com/ashwoodcityWARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.Listener discretion is advised.The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Episode 124 - See a Man About a Dog

The feel-good factor around the club is spilling over into the private life of Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan. Once besieged by abuse and torment, it would seem the fans have finally been appeased... Those popular new acquisitions however are coming at a costly price.Paul Waggott as Patrick NolanHelena Doughty as Jess TateJohn Brannoch as Colin WalshEpisode written by:Joel EmeryEdited by:Joel EmeryExecutive Producer:Joel EmeryWith thanks to:The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholderswww.patreon.com/ashwoodcityWARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.Listener discretion is advised.The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Episode 123 - Repo Man

Ashwood City arrive in Liverpool on the eve of their match with the 2020 PL Champions. With new signings Vassos, Luna and Kevin travelling in the matchday squad, expectations are high... But for Chief Player Liaison Officer Theo Clinton the matchweek is much more complicated. Paul Waggott as Patrick NolanHelena Doughty as Jess TateAdam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' WoodallThomas Mitchells as Theo ClintonChristopher Swift as Reuben ThomasEpisode written by:Joel EmeryEdited by:Adam JarrellDirected by:Adam JarrellExecutive Producer:Joel EmeryWith thanks to:The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholderswww.patreon.com/ashwoodcityWARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.Listener discretion is advised.The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Episode 122 - Fabtastic Beasts and Where To Find Them

The English transfer window is closing fast and Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan is struggling under the pressure; during the once in a lifetime window for Ashwood City. Paul Waggott as Patrick NolanHelena Doughty as Jess TateAdam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' WoodallJohn Brannoch as Colin WalshAmina Koroma as Dofi AkuffoAdditional Voices:Joaquin Augusto Quinteros Joel Emery Episode written by: Joel EmeryEdited by: Joel Emery & Adam JarrellDirected by: Adam JarrellExecutive Producer: Joel EmeryWith thanks to:The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholderswww.patreon.com/ashwoodcityWARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.Listener discretion is advised.The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Episode 121 – Deadline Day: Part 2

The opportunity to improve the Ashwood City squad for the 2021/22 Premier League season is slipping away. An old ally of Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan offers an unlawful alternative to their transfer woes. Paul Waggott as Patrick NolanAdam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall  Christopher Swift as Reuben ThomasAdditional Voices:Joel Emery Episode written by:Joel EmeryEdited by:Joel Emery & Adam JarrellDirected by:Adam JarrellExecutive Producer:Joel EmeryWith thanks to:The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholderswww.patreon.com/ashwoodcityWARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.Listener discretion is advised.The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Episode 120 - Deadline Day: Part 1

The Premier League returns and the new power structure of Ashwood City has Patrick Nolan at the helm. Lack of activity in the transfer window has provoked a strong backlash from the fanbase, leading to widespread vandalism. Paul Waggott as Patrick NolanHelena Doughty as Jess TateAdam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall  John Brannoch as Colin WalshThomas Mitchells as Theo ClintonChristopher Swift as Reuben ThomasAdditional Voices:Danny JamiesonJonny BlainErika MarchantAnt McGinleyJohn WalkerMarcus SpellerJim CampbellPete DonaldsonNatalie GreenEsmonde ColeEpisode written by:Joel EmeryEdited by:Adam JarrellDirected by:Adam JarrellExecutive Producer:Joel EmeryWith thanks to:The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholderswww.patreon.com/ashwoodcityWARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.Listener discretion is advised.The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

2021/22 SEASON: Window Shopping

It's the final matchweek of the Premier League season and Ashwood City Chief Executive Patrick Nolan finds himself with a new level of power. The dramatic events of the week before have not been taken lightly by Anaheim Sports Group as Patrick takes to The University of Ashwood to reflect on his recent endeavours.Paul Waggott as Patrick NolanHelena Doughty as Jess TateAdam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall  Victoria Gibson as Alex MorrisonAcushla-Tara Kupe as Dr. Rachel WebberRamone Dale-Cruickshank as Harvey SimmsAdam Alexander as Adam TateJohn Brannoch as Colin WalshThomas Mitchells as Theo ClintonAdditional Voices:Joel EmeryNalan BurgessEpisode written by:Joel EmeryEdited by:Adam JarrellDirected by:Adam JarrellExecutive Producer:Joel EmeryWith thanks to:The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholderswww.patreon.com/ashwoodcityWARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.Listener discretion is advised.The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Episode 118 - Finale: Part 2

Wembley Stadium plays host to the FA Cup Final between Chelsea and Ashwood City. As kick-off looms, the historic purchase of 30% of the club on behalf of the Ashwood City Supporters' Trust comes to completion. Helena Doughty as Jess TateAdam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall  Rhys Tees as Frank FinnanAdam Alexander as Adam TateJohn Brannoch as Colin WalshThomas Mitchells as Theo ClintonAdditional Voices:Joel EmeryEpisode written by:Joel EmeryEdited by:Adam JarrellDirected by:Adam JarrellExecutive Producer:Joel EmeryWith thanks to:The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholderswww.patreon.com/ashwoodcityWARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.Listener discretion is advised.The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Episode 117 - Finale: Part 1

With a new regime being installed at the club and an FA Cup final on the way, acting Chief-Executive Jess Tate continues to assist the transition. Helena Doughty as Jess TateAdam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall  Rhys Tees as Frank FinnanLuke Stevenson as Gareth McAskill John Brannoch as Colin WalshThomas Mitchells as Theo ClintonAdditional Voices:Joel EmeryEpisode written by:Joel EmeryEdited by:Adam JarrellDirected by:Adam JarrellExecutive Producer:Joel EmeryWith thanks to:The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholderswww.patreon.com/ashwoodcityWARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.Listener discretion is advised.The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Episode 116 - Game Over

The hierarchy of Ashwood City is turned on its head as the Supporters Trust gain significant progress due to some help from an old friend. Paul Waggott as Patrick NolanAdam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall  Helena Doughty as Jess TateVictoria Gibson as Alex MorrisonRhys Tees as Frank FinnanAdam Alexander as Adam TateAcushla-Tara Kupe as Dr Rachel WebberAdditional Voices:Joel EmeryLuke StevensonEpisode written by:Joel EmeryEdited by:Adam JarrellDirected by:Adam JarrellExecutive Producer:Joel EmeryWith thanks to:The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholderswww.patreon.com/ashwoodcityWARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.Listener discretion is advised.The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Episode 115 - The End of an Error

Off the back of a huge FA Cup Semi-Final appearance for Ashwood City; European football is thrown into chaos as The Super League announce their arrival on the world stage.Paul Waggott as Patrick NolanAdam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall  Helena Doughty as Jess TateVictoria Gibson as Alex MorrisonJohn Brannoch as Colin WalshRhys Tees as Frank FinnanAdam Alexander as Adam TateAdditional Voices:Joel EmeryNalan BurgessLuke StevensonEpisode written by:Joel EmeryEdited by:Joel EmeryDirected by:Adam JarrellExecutive Producer:Joel EmeryWith thanks to:The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholderswww.patreon.com/ashwoodcityWARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.Listener discretion is advised.The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Episode 114 - The League Of Extraordinary Gentlemen

Wembley Stadium plays host to Leicester City v Ashwood City in the FA Cup Semi-Final. A government approved test event has allocated seats for 4,000 supporters inside the 90,000 seater. Paul Waggott as Patrick NolanAdam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall  Helena Doughty as Jess TateRhys Tees as Frank FinnanKelly Somers as HerselfAdditional Voices:Joel EmeryEpisode written by:Joel EmeryEdited by:Adam JarrellDirected by:Adam JarrellExecutive Producer:Joel EmeryWith thanks to:The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholderswww.patreon.com/ashwoodcityWARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.Listener discretion is advised.The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Episode 113 - The Fans Doth Protest Too Much

Ashwood City Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan is losing his grip on his position at the club as Anaheim Sports Group have accepted the offer from Harvey Simms. With the deal underway, all Patrick has to work with is a name... 'Bohai'.Paul Waggott as Patrick NolanAdam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall  Helena Doughty as Jess TateRamone Dale-Cruickshank as Harvey SimmsJohn Brannoch as Colin WalshEsmonde Cole as KFCThomas Mitchells as Theo ClintonVictoria Gibson as Alex MorrisonAdditional Voices:Joel EmeryEpisode written by:Joel EmeryEdited by:Adam Jarrell & Joel EmeryDirected by:Adam JarrellExecutive Producer:Joel EmeryWith thanks to:The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholderswww.patreon.com/ashwoodcityWARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.Listener discretion is advised.The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Episode 112 - Simms City: Part 2

A mockumentary podcast that follows fictional Premier League club Ashwood City FC. Think The Thick Of It meets The Office meets the circus of Premier League football!"Crying laughing at the first episode here""Very interested in learning more about the club Robbie Keane supported when he was younger""Love this podcast, so funny! Woody is a legend"This podcast is a serial, begin at episode 1.

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The Offensive

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