Julie and Casey sit down with Kim Perkins, former journalist and pro speed-skater turned coach and positive organizational psychologist, to discuss how we know what we know about human behavior. Along the way they dive into authenticity at work (and why it may not actually be a good goal), studying competitiveness when no one wants to admit that they really want to win, and how to ask better questions instead of look for easy answers. We also welcome our Season Three sponsor, Armoire, a clothing rental company for women who love great style but hate shopping. Try Armoire today via our link for 50% off your first month, PLUS an extra item! Use "voiceis" in the referral box for your best discount.   TOP TAKEAWAYS Our society currently seems to equate authenticity with the knee-jerk reaction (our FIRST response to a stimulus) . . . especially on social media, when so often that knee-jerk response can be a fear-based reaction, and not how we actually want to act. And on that note, maybe “bring your whole self to work” is neither possible nor ultimately DESIRABLE . . .  Sometimes, the correct scientific way to gather human data (i.e., the gatherer being a blank / neutral presence so that they don’t influence anyone) actually gives us flawed information, and the incorrect way (sharing some of your own humanity with the people you’re studying) gets you the truth . . . but it’s not “scientific”. WHEW. What does this mean for how we know what we know about human behavior? How do we, as smart, savvy consumers of information, discern between what’s informative and what’s bullshit with the “studies say” genre of news article? Mini-lesson: What is work armor, why do we develop it, and what if we want to upgrade to something better? Take our work armor quiz to find out!   Kim Perkins holds a Ph.D. in positive organizational psychology. A former journalist and pro athlete, Kim works on purpose, culture, and communication with leaders at cutting edge science, tech and entertainment companies. Her first book, Winner Take None (2022), explores the role competition plays in our lives.    

Voice Is

UNMEASURABLE with Kim Perkins: Authenticity, human behavior, and other squishy data

   Casey Erin Clark and Julie Fogh, founders of Vital Voice Training and co-hosts of the VOICE(is) podcast, host a panel discussion on executive presence. In it, they explore the nebulous definition of executive presence and how our idea of what leaders should look and sound like has marginalized so many. Along the way, expect corporate horror stories, tales of triumph, and big laughs . . . along with truth bombs and mic drop moments that blow the idea that leaders need to look and sound one particular way out of the water. PANEL GUESTS: Phnam Bagley is building the future . . . literally. She is a speaker, educator, and founder of the firm Nonfiction Design, taking on everything from headphones to furniture to space architecture to turn science fiction into reality. http://nonfiction.design Kelly Hoey is the author of BUILD YOUR DREAM NETWORK, speaker, community builder, and world-renowned expert in networking. She also has an extensive corporate background in both law and finance. http://jkellyhoey.co Christina Blacken is revolutionizing the modern workplace with her company New Quo, introducing how narrative intelligence can be used to tackle inequities and make work work better for everyone. http://thenewquo.com Patty Alvarenga is on the ground every day running conversations on equity and inclusion that are shaping the future of work with The Collective. http://hello-collective.com   Watch the video version here.   Phnam Bagley is a French Industrial Designer and Space Architect with 15 years experience designing hardware in Audio, Wearables, Biotech & Healthcare, Luxury Goods, Transportation, Sports and Aerospace. She has designed and led teams at varied design consultancies including IDEO, Lunar, Matter and Lifestyledesign. Phnam's work spans 4 continents, and companies ranging from Fortune 500's to startups. Clients include Intel, Comcast, Facebook, Atari, Halo Neuroscience and more. She speaks internationally on the subject of “Design for a Better Future”, covering stories of groundbreaking technologies, responsibility, design thinking and education. Phnam is the CEO and Design Director at Eternal Luxe, a brand of luxury goods made in USA. She also teaches industrial design at California College of the Arts and mentors at Founder Institute.   Networking expert Kelly Hoey is the author of Build Your Dream Network: Forging Powerful Relationships In A Hyper-Connected World (Penguin Random House). She’s working on her second book which focuses on the unique networks women need for career success. A frequent speaker and source for networking insights, Kelly has been lauded from Forbes (“1 of 5 Women Changing the World of VC/Entrepreneurship”) to Fast Company (“1 of the 25 Smartest Women On Twitter”) to Business Insider (“1 of the 100 Most Influential Tech Women On Twitter”) and Inc. (1 of “10 Most Well-Connected People in New York City's Startup Scene”). Empowering A Billion Women By 2020 included her on their list of the “100 Most Influential Global Leaders Empowering Women Worldwide”. Not bad for a former corporate lawyer. Connect with Kelly via www.jkellyhoey.co.   Christina Blacken: I’m a public speaker, performer, and founder of The New Quo. The New Quo is a leadership development and inclusion consultancy helping leaders create inclusive cultural and organizational change through their narrative intelligence. I have helped 1500 leaders at Fortune 500 companies and VC backed startups leverage the psychological power of story to transform behavior, build inclusive culture, and communicate new ideas with deeper connection and influence to achieve status-quo breaking goals through training, courses, consulting, and coaching. In my early career, I worked for 10 years across four industries, using stories to drive change including inspiring 300k teens to take action on social causes, and closing 6.5M in sales with the teams and household brands she's worked with. The New Quo has been featured in Elle.com, Cosmopolitan, Marie Claire, Huffington Post, Forbes, Business Insider, and Thrive.com among other outlets. I graduated from Cornell University with a Bachelors Degree in Policy Analysis and Management. As an Utah native & NYC resident for 10 years, I know far more uses for jello than she’d like to admit.   Patty Alvarenga (she/her) is a diversity, equity, and inclusion consultant and Sr. Strategist at Collective.  She has deep experience in building DEI programs from the ground up across the tech industry, ranging from large corporations to high-growth startups. She now works with clients across many different industries, helping them distill complex DEI concepts into impactful and executable strategies that advocate for meaningful change. Her lived experiences as a Latina woman and an El Salvadoran immigrant fuel her commitment to create equitable organizations where everyone can be their full authentic selves and thrive. Patty holds a B.S in Marketing from the University of Florida. In her free time, she loves to explore national parks with her backpack and tent, ride her bike, and eat pupusas from her favorite LA restaurant. 

EXECUTIVE PRESENCE: A VOICE(is) Conversation on the Future of Leadership with Vital Voice Training

Julie and Casey chat with multidimensional visual and sound artist and hiphop ambassador D. Cross about exploring sound without filters, finding your path as an artist and educator, breaking down walls between disciplines. Be prepared for some poetry, multigenerational beatboxing, and hearing all about his innovative ad campaign and top secret recipe for “Universal Cola”.  TOP TAKEAWAYS “Voices / voice”—what if we have more than one? The rich history of D. Cross’s influences from the late 70’s/80’s: Buffy Robinson from The Fat Boys, Michael Winslow (voice artist/actor/comedian), Al Jarreau, Doug E. Fresh, and of course, cartoons. Between his spot on imitations of famous figures (and his teachers) and a bit of class clown instinct, D. has some STORIES to tell . . . all of which point to the freedom and unfilteredness that we start out with as vocal creatures. What if we brought back that childlike spirit to exploring our voices and what they can do? Sometimes the gifts others see in us don’t match our own narrative of what we’re supposed to do in life . . . but that information can be rewarding when we try it on for size. Learning to powerfully express yourself and your point of view must live side-by-side with the curiosity about others’ voices and perspectives. It’s an exchange. The crucial ingredient of vulnerability (and therefore bravery) when we think of both play and authenticity Lesson: Consonants create compelling communication. (How’s that for alliteration?) D.Cross (Derick Cross) is a Queens NY-born and Brooklyn-based multi-dimensional vocal and visual performance artist and arts educator. He creates imagery and vocal art that transcends and crosses boundaries of genres and labels. This “Vocal Beat Expressionist” uses “vocal acrobatics “ to create sonic collages of his poetry combining words, raps and beatboxing. He has performed nationally & internationally in venues including Madison Square Garden, SOB’s, BB Kings, The New Vic Theatre, Carolines, and Lincoln Center’s Avery Fisher Hall. Mr Cross was selected as a cultural HipHop Ambassador for The US State Departments Next Level program. He recently served as a Hiphop Cultural Diplomat in Azerbaijan. D.Cross has been featured on MTV, The Electric Company Nickelodean, TV Land and BET’s 106 and Park. His vocal talents have been featured on the award winning Aflac “Pigeon Rap” ad and 7–Up ‘s “10” campaign. He was the Hottest Poets $10,000 Spoken Word Grand Champion of 2002/03 as well as a member of their international slam team of 2003. D.Cross’ visual art has been exhibited nationally and internationally (Sweden and Brazil). His artistry is currently featured in Dr Myrah Brown Green’s award winning art anthology “Brooklyn On My Mind”. Cross‘s work can be found as part of the collections of Erykah Badu (Singer), Ed Lewis (Founder of Essence), Ruby Dee (legendary actress), Judith Jamison (Alvin Ailey), Kool Herc (Hiphop founding father), Big Daddy Kane (Hiphop Legend), and Bashiri Johnson (world renowned percussionist). Mr. Cross is also a SVA (School of Visual Arts) graduate (Bachelors of Fine Arts) who has worked as an Arts Educator teaching youth visual arts and poetry for the over the past two decades. Follow D.Cross on Instagram.

EXPRESS with D. Cross: Dropping beats, artistic curiosity, and vocal freedom

Julie and Casey sit down with legendary San Francisco dancer and drag performer, Monique Jenkinson, aka FAUXNIQUE to talk about performing femininity, both through drag and not, finding authenticity through practices of artifice, and the journey of a Good Dance Student to nightclub performer, and get some San Francisco Dragucation.  *Note- we use the “c***” word a LOT in this episode- so take care for sensitive ears.   TOP TAKEAWAYS Drag is not (just) men in heels, it’s a rich, smart, funny, scrappy performance tradition that uses the body and artifice to access larger themes. Other kinds of drag performance of femininity include the good girl persona, and the world of ballet. Your curiosity is a prelude to discovering your wants- conditioning can make wants hard to identify, curiosity allows you to find them, lose them and find them again. Owning your curiosity, desires, and wants is crucial Practices of artifice can be a version of authenticity Balance is the answer to binaries- balance allows for dynamic movement and change between points. Your strut is the embodiment of your energy as you enter a space, whether that is virtual or physical, and being with your right to be seen with the willingness to contribute what you have. Please join us next week for a Strut Workshop with Monique 4/28 4pm PST/7pm EST.  Details are HERE:  https://vitalvoicetraining.com/labs Find Monique at fauxnique.net ODC June Performance:  https://www.odc.dance/festival   Other People and Events Mentioned in the episode:   Heklina:  https://www.dragtimewithheklina.com/ Juanita More https://juanitamore.com/ TrannyShack https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0468563/ Prince “Cream” https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0468563/ PJ Harvey Sheela Na Gig: https://youtu.be/Sjxr_No-yuY Ana Matronic and Scissor Sisters https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scissor_Sisters Bio: "I am an artist, performer, choreographer and writer. I made herstory as the first cis-woman to win a major drag queen pageant and subsequently my solo performance works have toured nationally and internationally in wide-ranging contexts from nightclubs to theaters to museums — from Joe’s Pub, New Museum and the historic Stonewall in New York City, Yerba Buena Center for the Arts, ODC Theater, The Stud, CounterPulse and de Young Museum in San Francisco, and in Seattle, Los Angeles, New Orleans, Provincetown, London, Edinburgh, Berlin, Zürich, Paris, Reykjavik, Rome, Catania and Cork. I have created space for kids to dress drag queens at a major museum and created college curricula. I played the DIRT (originated by Justin Vivian Bond) in Taylor Mac’s Lily’s Revenge and Eurydike in Anne Carson’s ANTIGONICK. I engaged in public conversation with Gender Studies luminary Judith Butler and RuPaul bestie Michelle Visage within days of each other. I am currently writing a memoir. Honors include residencies at Headlands Center for the Arts, Tanzhaus Zürich and Atlantic Center for the Arts, an Irvine Fellowship and residency at the de Young Museum, GOLDIE and BESTIE awards and 7X7 Magazine’s Hot 20. I have been nominated for the Theater Bay Area, Isadora Duncan Dance (IZZIE) and Herb Alpert Foundation awards and have received support from San Francisco Arts Commission, Foundation for Contemporary Arts, CHIME, Center for Cultural Innovation and the Kenneth Rainin and Zellerbach Family foundations."              

QUEEN with Monique Jenkinson: The art of drag and the performance of femininity with legendary Drag Queen, FAUXNIQUE

Julie and Casey sit down to talk with Pleasure Strategist Lidia Bonilla about the value, politics, and fear around women’s pleasure, what it takes to go from survive to thrive, and life lessons from caring for an ill parent. TOP TAKEAWAYS Reclaim your pleasure by following your curiousity Pleasure is your god given right Pleasure is unproductive by capitalist standards- yet it’s essential to our well being Pleasure is about connection, numbing is about disconnection We stay in our misery because it’s safe and familiar, but believing our misery is as good as it can get keeps us cut off from our pleasure and potential Lesson:  Following your curiosity Lidia Bonilla is an empowerment coach and product inventor, committed to women having lives full of power, pleasure, and intimacy. She is the founder of House of Plume, an intimate lifestyle brand that provides the discerning consumer with storage options for their pleasure items. Lidia co-founded Women of Sex Tech, a global organization dedicated to merging sex and technology. She is a highly sought after expert, whose work has been covered by the New York Times, Refinery 29, Forbes and Essence Magazine. I'm passionate about speaking on topics like making pleasure a habit, learning how to love your body, and creating a life of freedom and authenticity. 

PLEASURE with Lidia Bonilla: Finding, embracing, and living pleasure

Julie and Casey sit down with speaker/top LinkedIn voice/author of The Memo Minda Harts to talk about how she cares for herself as a speaker (and how she became even more visible during lockdown), claiming your voice and your identity, and how all of us can strive to leave the workplace better than we found it. Along the way, we discover our mutual love for the Golden Girls.  TOP TAKEAWAYS Sometimes, you can’t wait for someone ELSE to write the book or say the thing you wish they would, even if you think they may be more qualified than you . . . you have to do it yourself. What skills do the people who are in the rooms I want to be in have? “If you see yourself in those roles in the future, you should start working on that stuff now.”  For introverts who want to explore more visibility: remind yourself WHY you’re doing it, and make small, specific goals.  The crucial question for white folks who care about diversity, equity and inclusion and want to make the workplace better for everyone: what are the everyday acts that we can do to humanize the experience of others, especially others who might be different from me? “There’s no shortage of power if we share it.” You are the authority on your own lived experience. “I knew I had a voice. I just had to decide how to use it. And once I made that decision, it was very clear what to say next.” Minda Harts is the CEO of The Memo LLC and an award- winning and best-selling author of The Memo: What Women of Color Need To Know To Secure A Seat At The Table. Minda is a Professor at NYU Wagner and hosts a live weekly podcast called Secure The Seat. In 2020, Minda was named the #1 Top Voice for Equity in the workplace by Linkedin. She is an Aspen Ideas Festival Scholar and has been featured on MSNBC’s Morning Joe, Fast Company, The NY Times, and Time Magazine. Minda frequently speaks at companies like Microsoft, Amazon, Nike, and Bloomberg on topics such as Managing Diverse Teams, Courageous Leadership, and Advancing women of color in the workplace.

VISIBLE with Minda Harts: Showing up, choosing yourself, and claiming your voice

Julie and Casey sit down with theatrical casting director (and Tiktok rock star) Kate Lumpkin, to talk about the stories we tell and why we tell them, changing the jargon that creates unhealthy power structures, how authenticity happens in front of an audience, and burning our old ideas of “type” to the ground . . . both inside and outside of the theater world. Prepare for the dropping of many, many mics. TOP TAKEAWAYS: Kate's background in anthropology and folklore provides one of the major lenses for her work: how stories shape and change the world.  “We hear this mythos that there are only seven stories and we keep repeating them and refreshing them and re-illuminating them […] but what I find fascinating is how we’ve taken those core hero stories and TRANSFORMED them over time, and the potential we have to continue to transform them if we change the gatekeepers of who allows us to tell what stories.” The power of words and the problem with jargon: A phrase consistently used in the theater world is to refer to the casting director and creative team as “the other side of the table” . . . which, inherently creates a divide (and a power imbalance) in what ideally should be a space of play and collaboration. On being "Publicly Personal”—when people walk into the audition space that Kate creates, they know who she is, they know what she stands for, they know that she’s there to listen and be their champion without judgement. On the surface, a casting director’s job is to “acquire talent for a production” . . . but in addition to her job getting to know the immense talent pool of actors out there, Kate also finds herself being part therapist, politician, director, HR person, and explorer.  Type came out of the studio system in Hollywood, and was a way to essentially commodify an actor’s personal brand into something audiences would come back again and again to see . . . but where type has landed is “what do (mostly) white men find attractive/witty/sexy/charismatic” and what they can imagine someone with your body doing onstage. Rather than an actor trying to identify their “type” (fitting into someone else’s narrow box), she’d love them to think about their through line as a person: how does that expression of self affect what stories you want to tell and what point of view that their life’s journey allows them to bring to a role/story (of which your body is certainly a part . . . but not the whole). What is your Point of View? The moments in your life that have made you YOU + the code that you live by (what you stand for, what you would fight for, what you believe in) + how you filter those things out of your body and into the world (how you express yourself). Authenticity and performativity are NOT antithetical . . . because everything we do is in concert with other humans. We are always performing. So, how do we curate an authentic self that shows up? First of all: YOU are the arbiter of your own authenticity. Secondly: it requires self-reflection (those moments than shift your POV happen all the time). We have to check in with that, and we have to not judge the previous versions of our authentic selves. And . . . do the work. Stay curious. Learn about yourself. Go to therapy. Do the work. Things look performative when we try desperately to adhere to an external standard (what is popular, what is “successful”) rather than doing the inner work. On that “thing” that certain people walk into a room with (charisma, confidence, whatever you want to call it) — it comes from having done that inner work on knowing who you are . . . and bringing it into the room with no apology or need for permission or validation. When you have that, you don’t have to even talk about it or “show it off” . . . you just ARE. Kate considers her Meisner training “a two year professional certificate in listening.” Because this type of training is about listening and repeating, listening and repeating, listening and repeating, you not only learn to hear what’s being said, you learn to observe what’s underneath. In addition, Meisner requires that you get comfortable with discomfort, including the messier parts of ourselves. If we learn to sit with our own “messy uglies” and have compassion for those parts in other people, we could really change everything. DO NOT MISS Kate’s Big 5 question answers. LESSON: Getting out of the “prove yourself” mindset and walking into the room with power. Kate Lumpkin (she/her) is the Founder of and Lead Casting Director at Kate Lumpkin Casting, CSA. Collectively, as a casting professional, she has worked on over 40 TV/Film productions and 80 theatrical productions in New York City and across the USA including shows at The Kennedy Center, The Actors Theatre of Louisville, The A.R.T, NYTW, and many others. Kate teaches workshops in New York and at numerous Colleges and Universities. She is a private coach to clients all around the world. Kate is also the host of Broadway WELLness for Playbill.  Selected casting credits include: New York Theatre: OSCAR @ The Crown, We Are Here (dir. Steven Hoggett), Medusa, We Are The Tigers, Safeword, Afterglow, Cleopatra, The Bad Years, Eco Village, A Complicated Woman, Boarders, Between The Bars, Unraveled, Letters to the President, Reunion '69, Single Rider, Diaspora, The Other Side of Paradise, Counting Sheep, Sitting Bull's Last Waltz, The Excavation of Mary Anning, Agent 355, Emma: A New Musical, Love In Hate Nation, Five Points, Hart Island, Eastbound, Interstate, Honey Dipped Apocalypse Girls, Fefu and Her Friends. National Tour: Bandstand (1st National Tour). Regional Theatre: Endlings at American Repertory Theater, West Side Story at The Kennedy Center, On The Town at The Kennedy Center, Beau at The Adirondack Theatre Festival, Evocation to Visible Appearance at Actors Theatre of Louisville, We Are Here at The Cosmopolitan of Las Vegas, Opium at The Cosmopolitan of Las Vegas , A Christmas Carol 18', 19' at Actors Theatre of Louisville, Reunion '69 & Reunion '85 at the Newman Center. For more information, please visit kate-lumpkin.com. @katelumpkin Interview intro and outro music: "Elevator Heart," music by Julia Meinwald, lyrics by Sara Cooper, from the musical Elevator Heart, music by Amy Burgess and Julia Meinwald, book and lyrics by Sara Cooper

CAST with Kate Lumpkin: Finding your point of view, casting against type, and building better stories onscreen, on stage, and in life

Julie and Casey sit down with leadership coach Iggy Perillo to talk about how outward bound survival trips are an excellent learning ground for leaders, strategies for difficult people and conversations, and what it’s like to leadership coach a grieving roller derby team. TOP TAKEAWAYS: The outdoors has a lot to teach leaders including living your values, delegation, team work, and allowing everyone one meltdown. Keep things tangible when you are defining your goals—what is "winning" to you? How do you know when you’ve achieved it? In difficult conversations, address the behavior, not the individual. What are they DOING that is keeping you from there, and how can they fix it? For those impression-based feedback conversations: get more information about vague feedback by asking for specific examples of the behavior and how you can improve. Make sure you both are crystal clear what is being asked. The nuclear phrase for feedback you don’t agree with is “how does this feedback align with the values of our organization” Sign up for a mastermind group with Iggy here. ABOUT IGGY: I am a product of the Midwest who gets nostalgic about cornfields. I started in the field of experiential human development at the dawn of the twenty-first century which basically meant that I spent a lot of time outside entreating fifth graders to jump out of trees while hooked to ropes or scaring the crap out of them by hiking in woods at night under the guise of environmental education. Ratcheting up the intensity I progressed to instructing personal growth oriented canoe/backpacking and dogsled/ski expeditions in the Boundary Waters Canoe Area Wilderness. This included teaching people how to cook over an open fire and the power and self efficacy that comes from carrying everything you’ll need for a few weeks in your boat/sled/on your back. Even though it often felt like an individual endeavor to people it was done in a team context so my attention to the creation and culture of the team was also crucial. Doing this work with teens and adults made me realize that as the age of the participants increased it was my job to make sure the sophistication and impact of conversation topics kept pace. The evening fire wasn’t just wilderness tv, it was a place for talking about the struggle and growth of the people and their team; who someone is and who they want to be. I made that growth real to people and helped them navigate the world as the person they wanted to be. It was glorious to spend 150+ days a year sleeping outside facilitating the emergence of leaders and excellent teams. Eventually I added in spending a bit of time training other people to do this same thing. Along the way I earned a Master’s Degree in Experiential Education and a teaching license in English Language Arts (obviously, right?). I did a ton of training on topics like: conflict resolution, restorative justice and mental health first aid mixed with technical wilderness travel and safety skills. I earned some fancy pieces of paper saying I can either likely keep you alive in various situations or that I do a pretty good job of not letting you get too close to dead in the first place. And I read what feels like a billion research driven books on topics in related fields like neuroscience, behavioral economics, educational psychology, performance studies and experiential theory. I still read all the time - they never stop coming out with new research or books.    

OUTSIDE IN with Iggy Perillo: Leadership lessons from roller derby and the great outdoors

Julie and Casey sit down with Dani Medrano, a San Francisco based writer, community builder and sober lady to talk about all drinking, and the joy of a sober life. The pandemic has increased our collective alcohol intake pretty significantly, so if you are questioning your relationship with alcohol (whatever stage) this discussion is for you.  TOP TAKEAWAYS Women are drinking more during the pandemic, to the detriment of their health. Alcohol is marketed to us as a catch all for celebration, connection, stress relief, etc. etc. Yet, questioning your drinking is considered a “you” problem. You don’t need to hit “rock bottom” to question your drinking, and questioning your drinking does NOT automatically make you an alcoholic. Alcohol is marketed to women in a way that takes advantage of the incredible stresses and double binds women live under. 12 Step programs are only one option—for women, the rhetoric of powerlessness and breaking down of the ego may be the exact opposite of what they need to recover. Recovery isn’t a set of rules to live by; it’s a process unique to you to build a life you don’t need to escape from. Community is critical. Sober does not equal boring. Resources: Recovery options besides AA (these are just a few) Tempest: jointempest.com The Luckiest Club: theluckiestclub.com Forever 35 Sober: Find them on Facebook Book Recommendations: This Naked Mind by Annie Grace Quit Like a Woman by Holly Whitaker Nothing Good Can Come From This by Kristi Coulter We Are the Luckiest by Laura McKowen Podcasts: Edit with Aidan Donnelly Rowley and Jolene Park Recovery Happy Hour with Trisha Instagram Follows: @urbansagesf @teedoodler @recoveryhappyhour @soberisthenewblack Dani Medrano is a writer, program manager, recovery coach and pep-talk provider in San Francisco, CA. When she’s not working, writing, or lifting weights, you can find her walking her dog, Tater, or in the kitchen eating homemade mochi muffins with her roommates.   Are you sober? Sobercurious? Check out Dani's newsletter at http://slowmotionsober.substack.com/ to learn more about The Sober from Bullshit Recovery Club and to join the community. She'd so love to hear from you.   

SOBER with Dani Medrano: On women, drinking, and building a life you don't need to escape from

Julie and Casey chat with Liz Hara (prolific TV writer, expert puppeteer and costume designer, citizen of Sesame Street, candy expert, all-around-cool-chick) about running toward failure, the pure magic and community-building power of puppets, what it’s like to be the only POC in a writer’s room (and how that world is changing for the better), and why puppets and emus don’t mix.  TOP TAKEAWAYS: Liz fell in love with puppets while working in theater in Minneapolis as a teenager and watching a gruesome dark comedy called Shockheaded Peter. Her first love is Butoh-style puppetry, where the puppeteers actually disappear even as they’re right in front of you working the puppets. For the last several years of working with Jim Henson studios, she’s been learning the art of moniter-style puppetry, where you have to puppet while watching a reversed image on a monitor to make sure the puppet is doing what it’s supposed to. Our brains hurt just thinking about it. Her work with puppets has allowed Liz to travel all over the world with shows and to festivals. One of those festivals, the World Puppet Festival of Charleville-Mézières, came along at a time when she was feeling some existential dread (“maybe I’ve just seen everything that there is to see and I don’t know what I’m doing with my life blah blah blah”), and renewed her faith in everything. Couldn’t we all use a dose of that? “For puppetry to work, the audience has to buy into the premise. By putting it up there, the artist is inviting the audience to ‘come play’. You have to agree that the thing we are moving is not just a doll being wiggled—we have to agree that this thing is alive. So there’s this immediate sense of community that is built, and that’s what I think makes it so special and so powerful.” (And isn’t that the goal of every artist and every public speaker—to create community?) Sesame Street is “the home of [Liz’s} heart”—she started out as a puppet builder and puppet costume designer and became a puppet “wrangler” (which she describes as the “pit crew” for the puppets on set.) And she’s got some STORIES…https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1pvtcWwPVmk&t=113s It was actually one of the head writers on Sesame Street who encouraged Liz when she wanted to venture from writing plays and works for puppets to writing for TV. She began writing for Sesame Street, and then entered a pitch competition at the Austin TV Festival (which she won!), got a manager and an agent, and got her first staff writing position on a sitcom, and found out she had to move to LA from NY with about 17 hours notice.  Liz has now been in several writers’ rooms, sometimes diverse, and sometimes where she’s been the only person of color in the room. Her experience is that being “the only” means that she was looked at as the default expert on ALL people of color, or wondered if she was supposed to be the “BIPOC police”. Part of the ethos of a writers’ room is that you never want to kill an idea or a joke unless you can “one up” it. This means that a lot of energy goes into “do I speak up or will this moment pass,” which means you get quieter, which means you may be seen as not fully present . . . (classic double binds). A more diverse writer’s room means that each writer can draw on their own personal experience instead of having to represent EVERYONE’s experience. Why YA TV shows might have some of the best writing out there. If you need ideas for how to bring your community together digitally in this time, Liz has your back . . . (QUARANTEDTALKS!!??) “Play is a joyful approach to life without fear of failure—play and failure are extremely linked and you can’t create good work or live a good life without failure.” Puppeteering and writing is a “relentless process of learning a CRAFT”—which is why both the dedication to your own learning and the generous sharing of knowledge with others is so crucial. Institutional knowledge and the experience of/training from mentors is hugely important. Liz credits her many wonderful mentors, and is excited to now be playing that role for others. LIZ HARA writes television for little kids, big kids, and even bigger kids. She currently writes for Sesame Street, and won an Emmy for Outstanding Writing in 2018. She has also written for CBS’ Life in Pieces, Apple+’s Helpsters, HBO’s Esme & Roy, and Nature Cat and Odd Squad for PBS. Her newest gig is writing for Moon Girl and Devil Dinosaur, the newest Marvel superhero cartoon for Disney. Liz is also a puppet and costume builder, winning an Emmy for Best Costume Design in 2015 with her team for their work on Sesame Street.  She has worked on several other theatrical and film productions, including Avenue Q, Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark, and The Lion King.   Liz is also a fantastic dancer, is super fun at weddings, and has an encyclopedic knowledge of candy.  

CREATE with Liz Hara: Running towards failure, writing the future of TV, and finding the fun

Julie and Casey sit down with Brittany Gooden (founder of the Good End) to talk about changing the way we think about business, why we can't make change using the same tools that can hurt us, questioning tradition with truth, the surprising healing journey of entrepreneurship, and measuring success by lives changed, not dollars earned. TOP TAKEAWAYS Effective leadership requires you to slow down, get vulnerable, stop comparing yourself to others, and most of all to heal yourself first. Trust yourself: Your life experience is wisdom waiting to be deciphered It's okay not to know everything.   Not all advice is good advice—get curious where they are coming from to see if it fits with your journey Success can be measured by all kinds of metrics, not just monetary ones. When you don't know what people need, ASK and then LISTEN to what they tell you.  About Brittany Gooden: The idea for Good End came to Brittany when she realized how often friends of small businesses approached her to help them create digital content to support their brand marketing. But with her experience in content creation working on large-scale productions in TV, media, and advertising, she knew the ins and outs of creating just one piece of content would require a thought-out strategy and a sizable budget that almost always wouldn’t guarantee a significant return. Most of these knowledge seekers happened to be trailblazing women and people of color whose businesses are centered around a cause, so Brittany sought to help them create the marketing and digital tools they need on their own so their companies can continue to thrive. With an eye for engaging visuals and a passion for supporting the entrepreneurial community, Good End was formed.⁠ Find the Good End at good-end.com

LEAD with Brittany Gooden: On building new leadership, and breaking norms of tradition with truth, love, and compassion

Julie and Casey chat with community leader and NYC City Council District 27 candidate Nantasha Williams about her journey into public service, her experience helping to organize the women’s march, looking young in an arena that doesn’t exactly prize youth, intergenerational translation and mediation, creating coalitions, and what it takes to engage everyone in the political processes that affect their daily lives.  TOP TAKEAWAYS: When people asked “What do you want to be when you grow up?”, Nantasha’s answer was “I want to be a judge” because of Thurgood Marshall. “I was really moved by this idea that someone could live a life in service to others in making conditions better for all The necessity (and challenges) of creating coalitions—how can we come together around common goals and values even across difference . . . and how can we know when we CAN’T “come together”? What would it look like if we spent as much time and money on educating people about the actual process of government as we did electing candidates? We have to broaden our attention beyond the “big” races to the local races (city council, sheriffs, police commissioners, judges, DAs) that profoundly affect our daily lives and the issues that we care about. As a person with a great deal of knowledge and expertise in an era where some people distrust that expertise in government (and prefer “outsiders”), Nantasha’s strategy is to meet people where they are and LISTEN. “It goes back to collaboration and collective organizing.”  She sees herself as the mediator between respecting history and past innovators and bringing fresh ideas—we need that intergenerational exchange. Of all the communication challenges she faces as a young Black woman in politics, ageism seems to be the most “in your face”—as in, everyone feels very free to comment on it. Because ageism for her shows up as doubt in her level of experience, she often feels like she has to recite her resume . . . She then reminds herself that sometimes it comes from people who, for whatever reason, don't believe that she ought to be where she is, but she’s THERE. (We call this the “if you’re in the room, you belong in the room” principle.)  “Running for office is like a rollercoaster ride” emotionally— Nantasha keeps herself grounded and present by not allowing herself to get on that ride. Sometimes our heartbreaks or “failures” are the catalysts that lead us to something better or more important that we could imagine. Nantasha is learning to trust her voice every day - “lean[ing] in to how I really feel about something[…]and allowing myself to follow my own voice and not the voices of others.” Nantasha Williams is a community leader, social justice advocate, and organizer committed to affecting real change in her community.  In 2014, she was appointed the Executive Director of the New York State Black, Puerto Rican, Hispanic and Asian Legislative Caucus. Today, she serves as a member of Community Board 13 where she was appointed Chair of the Special Initiatives Committee. Nantasha also serves as board member of Life Camp Inc. – a cure gun violence program. Nantasha is currently the Project Manager for Minority Women Business Enterprise Compliance, and helped initiate community outreach efforts for the JFK Redevelopment Program.  Nantasha is currently in a PhD Program for Social Welfare at the CUNY Graduate Center with a research focus on Social Movements, Public Policy, and Racial Justice.  She acquired her undergraduate Bachelor of Arts degree in Political Science from Virginia Commonwealth University and holds a Master’s in Public Administration from Rockefeller College of Public Affairs and Policy.  As a candidate for District 27 New York City Council Race, Nantasha’s key issues are creating new economic opportunities, youth development, housing, and protecting our seniors. 

RUN with Nantasha Williams: Raising your voice in politics and the journey to NYC city council

Julie and Casey sit down with Nitika Chopra (founder of Chronicon) to talk about building a platform and community to celebrate and elevate the lives of chronically ill folks. Along the way, they talk about the medicine of feeling all your feelings (including grief), why “you can fix your problems via your THOUGHTS!” can be abusive, hearing the voice of the divine (whatever that looks like for you), and the revelatory power of Idina Menzel’s voice. TOP TAKEAWAYS Nitika’s journey - from running a beauty and self-love publishing platform to talk show host to community creator for people dealing with chronic illness Nitika saw chronically ill folks as being in the same boat the people of size were years ago: being ignored by the fashion and beauty and fitness industries because they assumed they wouldn’t want or didn’t need products and services built for them. “Oh, you’re sick now. Bye.”  It’s estimated that 133 million people in America have a chronic illness. When it comes to living inside American hustle culture (particularly as a founder), Nitika is “not interested in conforming”.  Just as curvy folks want to be celebrated for who they are RIGHT NOW AS THEY ARE (not for losing weight), the lived experience of chronically ill people deserves to be celebrated in all its fullness.  The mission of Chronicon is not to make a case about the worthiness of chronically ill people or about “fitting in” to a wider culture—it’s about owning and honoring the full experience and the superpowers of chronically ill people. What does it look like not just to survive, but to thrive? What can we learn from the lived experience of chronically ill folks? Perhaps the benefits of what Nitika calls “spiritual surrender”. After spending so much time working and striving to heal her body, she was brought to a point where she finally accepted what WAS and could be truly present. “This is our body, and it is doing the best that it can, and we can love it no matter what. And from THERE, we can live.” Part of the subtle and important difference between that spiritual surrender and feeling like a failure is allowing yourself to grieve. Grief allows us to process the sadness of losing something you wanted without the shame of wanting it in the first place. Spiritual surrender doesn’t mean that you stop striving, learning, fighting, etc. So often, we teach the things we most need to learn (Casey, Julie, and Nitika all have experienced this). For Nitika, teaching self love has helped her to address many, many years of self-hatred. Who gave Nitika permission to fight for herself? God, and her spiritual practice. At 15, at a serious low point, she heard a message that carried her through: “It’s not about you.” So much of “wellness/spirituality/self-help” culture spreads a message of manifesting your way out of your problems—as so many do, Nitika found herself trying to heal herself via belief, and felt like a failure when she didn’t heal. To be clear, this “you can get rid of your problems by repeating mantras and changing your mindset” (and its dark mirror, if you still have problems, it’s because you didn’t believe hard enough) version of “wellness” and “spirituality” perpetuates abuse. We’ve been conditioned by American culture to numb out and avoid feeling our pain, but according to Nitika, “Dealing with our pain, our truth about our pain is one of the greatest medicines in our life. There’s so much wisdom and medicine inside of our pain and suffering. It’s not a place I choose to stay - I don’t want to marinate in it or bring others down by spreading my pain everywhere, but when you give yourself permission to FEEL it, you allow it to be released and to move and take shape and move ON.” Singing feels like home to Nitika. Seeing Idina Menzel in Rent on Broadway was a revelation to her—“Women can SOUND like that?” Her programing was that women should be neat and poised and small and tidy and not “flaunt their spirits”. And NOW, she’s part of the Resistance Revival Choir, and on their debut album! Nitika Chopra is the founder of Chronicon, a media and events company, dedicated to elevating the lives of those living with a chronic illness. Nitika was diagnosed with psoriasis at the age of 10 and psoriatic arthritis at the age of 19 and lived over 17 years of her life being defined by her conditions. In 2010 she decided to take all of the lessons her health journey had taught her and use it to help others with the creation of her online magazine Bella Life. Since the start of her entrepreneurial journey Nitika has hosted her own TV talk show on Z Living called Naturally Beautiful, hosted over 40 events with hundreds of guests in attendance and has created dynamic partnerships with over 150 brands in the wellness space. After 10 years in event creation, Nitika launched Chronicon in the fall of 2019, focused on those living with a chronic illness. The event sold out, had over 2,000 livestream viewers, high-level brand sponsors and has been growing ever since. Now, Nitika is excited to announce that Chronicon is expanding online with The Chronicon Community, a new, accessible online space with inspiration, advocacy, and empowerment for chronically ill folks across the globe to connect. Follow her for daily inspiration @ChroniconOfficial.

SELF-LOVE with Nitika Chopra: Feeling your feelings, moving through grief, and living out loud

Julie and Casey sit down with Six Degrees Society founder Emily Merrell to talk about building communities, the best way to network, and how to host an event to foster connection. Along the way we get the epic stories behind how she met her husband in New Orleans doing everything wrong, and what happens when your dream wedding gets evacuated 30 minutes before the ceremony.   TOP TAKEAWAYS Show up as a human, not a human representation of a brand Take the awkward out of networking situations by providing structure. Be a good host by thinking of what your guests’ needs are—they’re simpler than you think! Our adult lives all come down to summer camp skills. The lessons we learn from jobs like retail, hospitality and babysitting are treasure troves of information on how we human. More volume does not equal better networking. You can make deep connections even if you don’t have access to as many events as say, NYC. Take care of your communities! Offer first, but don’t be afraid to ask either. Sometimes doing the wrong thing is the way to make a memorable connection. Use what you have on hand to come up with small talk . . .  seriously anything (even penis straws). Lesson:  How to "Host" About Emily Merrell: HEY, I’M EMILY I'm Chief Networker and Founder of Six Degrees Society. People also (lovingly) refer to me as "20 questions" because I've always loved figuring out people's stories. While working in the fashion industry, I dreamt up a place where individuals could come together from all industries, all backgrounds and show up who they are —unapologetically. Nothing makes me happier than connecting people who could mutually make each other's lives more enjoyable. In addition to Six Degrees Society, I also work with companies, founders, and more who are looking to build a strong community of their own, plan retreats to inspire their own teams, or need a mentor in their own business journey. 

COMMUNITY with Emily Merrell: Creating community, finding (and leaning on) your people, and building relationships beyond “networking”

Julie and Casey sit down with Stephanie Dalfonzo, AKA “Stevie Knox” (80’s-era celebrity radio DJ) and one of the very first automated voices, to talk about her amazing career trajectory and her work now as a hypnotist, coach, author, and expert in combatting anxiety.  TOP TAKEAWAYS Following your dreams: pre-The Secret/manifesting culture, Stephanie grew up KNOWING she was going to be a radio DJ . . . and she made it happen. How Stephanie became “Stevie Knox”: alter-egos are a powerful way to access energy, intention, and different parts of ourselves when we need to.  The importance of listening, presence, and “tuning in” to the person we’re communicating with—even (and especially) when we can’t see them. We are not wired to be looking at ourselves looking back at ourselves while communicating with other people—our brains find that EXHAUSTING (not to mention weird). There is a convenient feature on zoom called “hide self view” that is a game-changer! The Power of the Pause - especially right now, try practicing small moments of presence many times an hour. Conscious breath, sitting in silence, etc. Create a better soundscape for your life! Why are you waking up to an alarm clock that shocks your system? Are notifications driving you batty? Use the technological tools available to you to reduce interruptions and anxiety.  Check out Stephanie’s book, Goodbye Anxiety, Hello Freedom, filled with practical tips for managing anxiety and building resilience. Stephanie Dalfonzo was the very first automated voice back in the 1980s when she was Celebrity Radio DJ “Stevie Knox,” Back then, she “hypnotized” her listeners to come back day after day. For the past 15 years, as an Integrative Hypnotist, she’s been using her voice to literally hypnotize her clients into making incredible life changes. One fear of flying client now has a successful business as The Five Foot Traveler, she’s helped countless female entrepreneurs create a life and business they love! Stephanie is also the author of Goodbye Anxiety, Hello Freedom, available on Amazon.

TUNE IN with Stephanie Dalfonzo: Talking for a living, connecting with your audience, and the power of the pause

Welcome to "VOICE (is)" - where we have conversations with people whose voices we love to dive into the good, the bad, and the messy of what makes your voice YOURS. Expect actionable advice about public speaking, confidence, nerves, in-office communication, etc, as well as deeper discussions on what power looks (and sounds!) like, how to let go of perfectionism and use fear to your advantage, and how to show up as your authentic self in a world full of unconscious bias. Vital Voice Training is a voice, public speaking, and communication coaching company founded to help clients communicate with savvy, charisma, and confidence. Whether you are giving a speech, leading a sales appointment or a brand new team, pitching your big idea for funding, or just finding the courage to make your voice heard, co-founders Julie Fogh and Casey Erin Clark’s extensive backgrounds in speech coaching and professional acting give them a unique perspective on what makes people want to listen. For the client, the result is your voice: amplified (not just louder).

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Voice Is

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