This week, Samantha sits down with Lana Lechkina, a quilling artist and owner of Just Quill It.  Lana was born in Russia and lived in a small town.  Dentistry at that time was rudimentary and her first experience with a dentist was horrific and involved a drill and her cheek.  A traumatic experience at this age has caused her to have anxiety around dentists even to this day.  She explains that even now, when she visits a dentist, she understands that the stress associated with the visit has its complications.  She metabolizes the anesthesia faster because of the stress and understands that it takes a little bit more for her, which causes her to be knocked out for a couple of days, at least.  The smells, the environment, and all of the things associated with a dentist's office trigger her anxiety, no matter how logical she knows she can be.So, for Lana, she likes to give herself small tasks.  She counts the colors in a piece of art, or she will count the number of patterns on the wallpaper.  This allows her to distract herself from what is happening and calms her down.  She knows that she doesn't want to have the doctor talk to her, because that could possibly distract them from the work that they are doing in her mouth.  She has tried all sorts of suggestions, but now understands that the best tool for her is to distract herself.  Counting is her best tool.  The dental assistants helping to redirect her attention is another great way for her to give a distraction.Quilling is something that Lana picked up initially as a hobby.  She didn't have the ability to draw or paint, but when it comes to creating intricate works of art with small strips of paper, she discovered a talent.  Eventually, her friend convinced her to have an event for her art and it has turned into her full-time business.  Then, about 3 years ago, her father was diagnosed with brain cancer.  He lost the ability to do anything on his own, and it began a 33 month long journey that was very hard and ended with her not being able to be there during his final days because of COVID.  Quilling calmed the stress associated with this situation, also.  For Lana, art is a way of escaping.  It's about beauty and elegance, not just in art, but in life.  If she can just help one person, just a little bit, she knows sharing her story will be worth it.If you would like to learn more about Lana or about Just Quill It, you can find more information at:Facebook: @justquillit  Just Quill It, the Art of Paper FiligreeInternet:  justquillit.com

Flushing It Out

Episode 83 - Lana Lechkina: The Little Tasks

This week, Samantha talks with DeDee Cai, owner of coaching and consulting company Fit To Profit.  DeDee helps business owners create the right mindset.  She says that 80% of business is mindset and 20% is strategy.  We are the driver behind our businesses.  DeDee loves working with moms who are business owners and helping them manage owning a business and having a family and has a passion for financial independence for women.For DeDee, her journey started when she was graduating from college.  She questioned the typical path women are “supposed” to take.  When she graduated college as a psychology major, she decided that becoming a psychologist wasn’t necessarily for her.  She didn’t know what she wanted, but she knew she didn’t want to simply “follow the steps.”  So, she tried out many different jobs, but what she discovered was that none of them felt like the right fit for her.From the outside, she was energetic, friendly, and loving, but what was hidden on the inside was depression.  She was depressed and fighting suicidal thoughts.  All of the “doing” was helping her cope with her feelings.  She didn’t feel good enough.  She didn’t feel worthy of love, she felt like a burden, and she felt like nobody cared about her.  Looking back, she understands that everything happens for a reason.  For her, it was her parent’s divorce that made her face new choices and challenges.  She and her mom opened a restaurant together and even though it did really well, she still had to ask herself “is this it?”  The answer was ‘no.’  Her new job, as successful as it was, took up too much time and was causing stress in her life.  To de-stress, she eventually ended up finding yoga.  Through yoga, she felt more alive and incredible for the first time.  She didn’t know how it worked on her, but she needed to figure it out.  She took yoga training and was learning not just how to teach yoga, but was also learning so much about herself.Eventually, she realized she needed to “break up with herself.”  The way she treated herself wasn’t acceptable anymore and she had a realization that "she wasn’t who she was."  For the first time, she was beginning to accept that certain things were a part of her and that she had the power to overcome them.  Her yoga practice started and she was studying health and wellness and expressing who she was.  This was the moment she discovered coaching and finally discovered what she wanted to do.  She was still busy, though, and wasn’t paying attention to the voice that was in the back of her mind telling her that she needed to start a coaching business.  Then, she lost her best friend to suicide at the same time as her own wedding.  Three days before her wedding, she was attending a funeral for her best friend.  It was this moment in her life that solidified in her mind that she was going to start her coaching business.  Her friend had suffered with depression just like she did, but now she realized that she didn’t have to suffer the same fate and she didn’t want anybody else to suffer the same fate, either.  This became her responsibility and mission.  This is the way she honors the memory of her friend.It was only when she was willing to bring light to the dark and take her power back that she was able to "break up with herself" and find what she had always been seeking.  That’s when she decided that things didn’t have to be the way they were.To find out more about DeDee Cai and her coaching business, visit:www.fittoprofit.comDeDee is also working on a book: "The Overcomer" - stories from entrepreneurs about overcoming challenges

Episode 82 - DeDee Cai: Breaking Up With Yourself

This week, Samantha talks with Cecile Blot (pronounced “blow”), about the challenges of starting a travel company, weathering the hit that the pandemic gave to the travel industry, and getting out of your bubble when it comes to travel.  Cecile is a travel advisor and the owner of Boundless Travels, where she creates unique bespoke travel experiences.She has never really had a traditional life and travel has been a part of her life since she was very young.  Since then, she’s had the travel bug, going to different destinations between jobs.  Her friends would ask her, “when is it going to end?”  The answer is, “never!”  She lived a very non-traditional lifestyle and ended up using that to her advantage. After years of consulting here and there after having moved to the Washington D.C. area, her mom asked her why she didn’t just become a travel agent.  So, the idea ruminated for a bit and she decided to do what she could to learn what it takes.  Of course, after realizing that nobody would take her on, she decided to start her own business.  This takes a lot of “building the plane and flying the plane at the same time.”  Since then, she was building and building her business and by the start of 2020 she had gotten so busy she almost couldn't keep up with it.  Then, the global pandemic happened.  The word of 2020 became ‘pivot,’ but in the travel industry, that’s a lot harder to do, especially when the majority of people aren’t traveling.  Today, things are starting to pick back up, especially with vaccinations, but things are still different.So, how can we use travel to heal during this crazy time?  According to Cecile, getting excited about something like a trip can be a great way to shift your mind away from the craziness and depression that has come from the pandemic.  Even just planning a trip and the anticipation of the trip can bring people so much joy.How else can travel be healing?  Cecile encourages people to get out of their comfort zones.  Everybody is different, but for Cecile, “true” travel doesn’t include gated resorts where you travel to a different country and never leave the resort.  Everywhere you go, you can take your bubble with you, but sometimes you need to get out of the bubble.  This is the only way to really understand the kindness of people around the world and challenge your own biases toward certain places and certain people.  “Travel opens your heart and your mind.”Getting out of your bubble is also the best way to get great stories.  Cecile recounts a story where she had just crossed into Laos and the only way to get to the place they were going was by river.  There were two options, the fast boat and the slow boat.  Of course, they wanted to take the fast boat because it would take way less time.  The story that Cecile tells about trip has to be heard to be believed.  The lesson is, “always take the slow boat.”  Looking back at that story is something that she will always remember.  She got out of her comfort zone and it didn’t turn out the way she thought it would but the memory will remain with her forever.  Cecile explains, “You never want to do things more than when you can’t do them.”  She believes that the pandemic can be an opportunity for people to grow.  This could be something that can make travel better and the travel experience as a whole better.  Over-tourism has been a problem in some places, and this has been a very unique opportunity for certain places to reset and become what they were before tourism started to be a problem.How can we get out of our bubbles?  Cecile suggests that you should have a professional plan your trip so that you are set up for success.  Be smart about it.  Also, if you’re just getting back out there after being cooped up for a while because of the pandemic, take baby steps to allow yourself to get re-acclimated to travel.  Start small and work your way back to the exotic trip you may have been planning before it all stopped.To find out more about Cecile Blot or to talk to her about your next trip, you can find her at:www.boundless-travels.comOn Facebook - Boundless TravelsOn Instagram - @boundlesstravels

Episode 81 - Cecile Blot: Get Out Of Your Bubble

This week, Samantha talks with newborn and family photographer, Dana Graham.  Her whole life, Dana just wanted to be a mom.  But, in Northern Virginia, the idea of just being a mom is hard, especially when her husband was working for the government.  Dana felt lost in her professional career and didn’t have a clear-cut path.  Then, a Facebook ad came up in her feed about photography.  One thing led to another, and she has been able to create a full-blown and fully-booked photography business and has a podcast for moms who feel trapped in the corporate world and are looking for a way to get out and follow their passions.  She understands that she isn't the only one who felt that way and wanted to create a community of moms that can support one another through her podcast.She has to remind herself sometimes that she started her photography business so that she could spend more time with her kids.  There are phases in life where you are pulled one way rather than the other.  This is the mindset shift she has had to make because she knows what will work for her.  Dana wants to grow her business, but along with that comes more time spent on her business and not her family.  So, she has to be able to set goals and label those specific goals.  To her, time is the most valuable thing, so goal setting has to be done with time in mind; where time will be spent and with whom the time will be spent.  Now that she is moving internationally, this will be even more challenging because her business is referral-based and she is moving to an entirely different country.Values are a broad topic.  For Dana, she wants to surround herself with moms who have built businesses and value spending time with their family.  She wants to involve her kids in her work and she wants to have them involved and around while she works.  This is what she values and wants people she works with to understand that it will be a reality with her.  How did she get into photography?  It was a targeted ad that came across her Facebook feed.  She had just had photographs done with her baby.  It was something that she could start for a very low cost and she knew that she loved making babies laugh, so it made sense for her.  The only hang-up was a seemingly saturated market.  At the time, she was so desperate to make it work, she knew that if it didn’t work, she would have to go back to the job that she knew was taking her away from her kids and keeping her from seeing them grow up.  She describes the leap to leave her job and become a photographer as the most savage decision she has ever had to make.Dana and her husband’s savage decision to leave the security of her job for her to pursue photography has shown her that a lot of times these types of decisions work out for the best.  Making that decision and having it work out has given her the courage to make more risky decisions.So, what’s the biggest lesson Dana has learned along the way?  It is separating her own mindset from the rest of the world's.  Everybody has a different opinion about everything, so when you’re making decisions, you need to make decisions specific to yourself.  Nobody knows you better than you, and when you can surround yourself with people that are aligned with the way you think, you can get much better advice from friends.  She believes you should spend more time in your own head than you do in other people’s heads.  Also, confidence is hard to build.  Dana believes that if you can just do something, whether it ends up as a mistake or not, or whether or not it becomes a failure, you will gain confidence.You can also apply to your mindset the fact that other people have already done what you want to do.  You can find those people via social media or other means and be willing to expand your circle to include those people and open up those new possibilities and get some encouragement.  Her podcast is a place where moms come to tell their stories and where women can come and find a community of moms that have done things differently.If you want to find more information on Dana Graham, her photography, or her podcast, visit:danagrahamphotography.comOr on Instagram: @dana_graham

Episode 80 - Dana Graham: Find Your Tribe

This week, Samantha talks with the President and Founder of Storybook Treasures, Denise Corbo.  Storybook Treasures is a nonprofit with the mission of “putting books into the hearts, hands, and homes of children in need.”  Denise was an educator for over 30 years, but she says that teaching found her.  She doesn’t describe herself as being a good student growing up, and school was hard for her.  She took cosmetology (vocation education) in HS, but her teacher told her that she needed to go to college instead of learn cosmetology.  So, she eventually had to make a shift in high school to take extra classes and summer school to prepare for admission to college.  Then, once in college, she graduated in just 2.5 years.Denise says, “I have a plan, but God always seems to have a bigger plan.”  Doors close, so she then has to ask herself what to do next and make the pivot to figure out how to get it done.  She negotiated with her mom to get into a private school, graduated in 2.5 years, and out of school she became a cosmetology teacher.  It is her journey that has enabled her to be a better teacher to her students.  How does she keep pushing through to doing big things?  She is a perfectionist, but she has learned to forgive herself.  There’s a growth mindset associated with how she reacts to situations.  Her journey has included teaching cosmetology for 5 years, then getting her masters degree in K-8 education.  She was then required to do student-teaching.  After her student-teaching the principal offered her a job as a first grade teacher.  It wasn’t her ideal spot, but she decided to go for it.  Storybook Treasures started in her kindergarten classroom.  When you teach, you have to meet the challenge of getting all of the kids where they need to be in order to meet a criteria set for all students.  Children all grow differently and they all develop at different rates, and she didn’t feel good about telling the parents of some of the kids that they weren’t up to “standards.”  When you read a book to a child in the classroom, that book immediately becomes a hot commodity for the children and make a connection to it.  She found that when she had multiple copies of her favorites in her classroom, the children were able to make connections to the book; connections that just can't be taught.  So, Denise decided to create treasures to go along with the books that gave the kids another connection to the book.  All of these connections helped the kids with retelling and literacy on a level that she had never seen before.  Of course, there were challenges as Storybook Treasures started to materialize.  There were issues with childrens' attention during class, so she shifted again to get the “treasures” to be something done at home.  Then, she found that the parents were reaching out to her to figure out where they could get the books.  She calls it the “Happy Meal” effect.  At the end of the year after starting the idea of using "treasures" to go along with the books, she discovered that one hundred percent of her students had aced their literacy tests.  This solidified the idea that Storybook Treasures was a great idea and set her on the journey to getting a non-profit set up.She took on a job driving a limousine so that she could pay to start her own non-profit.  She was called to make it happen and she made it happen.  Her husband couldn’t believe it, because he had just finished telling her that they couldn't use more of the family funds to get it all started.Throughout it all, Denise has had a can-do attitude and any time she was faced with a challenge, she met it head-on by learning what she needed to learn to allow her to meet her goals.Where can you find out more about Storybook Treasures?email:denise@storybooktreasures.orgWebsite:storybooktreasures.org

Episode 79 - Denise Corbo: Never Stop Learning

This week, Samantha talks with Sarah Shores, owner of Warrenton Wellness, a wellness center offering blue light therapy.  Sarah talks about her journey from doing engineering work for the US Coast Guard, to contracting Lyme’s Disease, to starting her own business offering Blu Rooms in Warrenton, VA.  Sarah had a very active lifestyle running marathons and riding horses and spending a lot of time outside, but everything came to a halt when she discovered that the difficulties she was having physically could be attributed to Lyme’s Disease.  This was all after seeing many doctors to diagnose her pain.  Eventually, the pain and the fatigue got to the point that she couldn’t function using conventional medical methods.  At the time, Blu Rooms were only available on the West Coast, but she took a chance and decided to travel out there and try it out.  She immediately felt relief of some of her symptoms and eventually decided she should open up a center here where she gets clients from all over the East Coast.Sarah has come to understand that if it wasn’t for her Lyme’s, she wouldn’t be where she is today doing what she loves, helping people.  She enjoys constantly exploring new areas in her own mind, including healing herself.  There is an analogy about neighborhoods that she shares with some of her clients.  It is an analogy that is originally attributed to the founder of Blu Rooms, JZ Knight.  She explains that the Blu Rooms allow a person to get away from their environments and gets them to a meditative state where they can get in tune with themselves and to a calm state where you are free of stress.  This place where you can go in your mind can be seen as having a path to it that is there, but is overgrown with weeds.  On the other hand, the stressful place we often find ourselves in our mind has a clear, paved superhighway that leads to it.  Now, she feels like she is able to make a difference in the world one person at a time by offering this blue light therapy that has been so helpful to her.It’s worth a try to see if it works for you, according to Sarah.  For her, it was worth a try and just from trying it she found hope.  It’s a unique place that allows you to escape for a bit.  A lot of times, we aren’t able to find the time or the place to escape and relax.  It is a mental reset.  Samantha then talks about her experience and what you can expect if you visit Warrenton Wellness.So, how is Sarah doing today?  Very well.  She’s gotten back into exercising and has her energy back that she lost during her bout with Lyme’s.  She will be 61 years old in 2021, but for her, that’s just a number.  She’s got energy and she’s got too much she wants to experience to think about losing time.  She’s creating her own path now and is getting back to the best version of herself she can be.To find out more about Warrenton Wellness, Blu Rooms, blue light therapy, and Sarah Shores, or to make an appointment, you can visit:warrentonwellness.comOr call Sarah to chat at: 540-216-2524

Episode 78 - Sarah Shores: Clear Your Path

This week, Samantha talks with Dr. Alyssa Adams, clinical psychologist turned intuitive business coach, about exploring yourself.  Samantha and Alyssa met each other on a “speed networking” event and since then, Samantha has wanted to have her as a guest to "flush out" her journey.  Alyssa and Samantha talk a lot about being shockingly honest and how a person who decides to do something outside the box can embrace that journey.Alyssa got her doctorate in clinical psychology and went the “traditional” route for a while, but then she found herself burning out.  She was doing a lot of clinical work and was exhausted from that.  Then, she took a position as the director of integrated health, but she was working constantly and burned herself out even more.  Then, she left that job and went to a leadership/administrative role in the same company to take a step back from client-focused work, but it brought a whole new set of complications.  Eventually, she came to a “career impasse,” which led her to coaching.  This got her back into the client-based environment and allowed her to work her own schedule.  She started learning to love all of the different aspects that come with coaching and with being an entrepreneur.  She needed to learn sales because she had no sales background.  As she got into that, she started to realize that there was a helpful aspect to sales that she could really connect with; that she could provide people with something that they needed.  People get stuck in these boxes that we make for ourselves.  If you do these specific things, you’ll achieve this stuff that you believe you want.  But what if that’s not what you want?  You need to be aware of when you’ve taken on an identity that doesn’t fit you.  Let’s say we’ve achieved what we thought we wanted to achieve.  Then what?  Alyssa would argue that you need to “let yourself explore.”  That you need to shift to a new excitement by exploring what excites you.  You are then paying attention to the parts of you that have been ignored for a long time.  People tend to litigate and then re-litigate with themselves to keep going in the direction they’re going.  What if you decided to pick a “thing” and that was the “thing” that you would work towards your entire life?  Is that realistic?Alyssa goes on to say, "Most people are not paying that much attention to me or what I have to say."  There’s freedom in that mindset which allows us to just be out there and be ourselves without having to worry about what other people are thinking.  Everybody has their own thing going on in their head.  If we do get into these patterns about how we talk to ourselves and think about ourselves, we just need to notice it and it’ll break those thoughts up and allow us to explore more.If you’re ready to take a “next step” into doing something a little bit non-traditional, Alyssa says that it will depend on what that “thing” is, but the first step is to explore what it is that you want to do and why you feel that pull.  Take some steps to get some clarity to understand the “why” and then take action.  The process is iterative, according to Alyssa.  If you can do the “thing,” you’ll get a lot of information back from that which will help you adjust and become better.If you want to learn more about Dr. Alyssa Adams, you can find her at:Web: dralyssaadams.comIG: @dralyssaadamsPodcast: The Uncommon Couch - found on your favorite Podcast platform

Episode 77 - Dr. Alyssa Adams: Let Yourself Explore

This week, Samantha talks with Havilah Vangroll of Have Strategy Coaching.  Havilah is a nutrition and health coach specializing in teaching the “how” to have a healthy life.  Food and nutrition is what she loves, but she has also learned over time that she needs to focus not only on these things, but the person as a whole.  She understands that having difficult conversations around food and nutrition with your family can be hard, too, so if they aren’t on board with your health-oriented goals, she wants to help with that.Havilah began acquiring her skills when she was a child because she was raised by a mom who was really into health and food and nutrition.  She grew up not realizing that other people weren’t learning the same things about food as she was.  When she started her own family, she didn't know how much of a challenge these things would be for her.  Her son had food allergies growing up and both he and she herself ended up with bad acid reflux.  She wasn’t doing well with her own stress, her daughter was sick, and her son had issues with what he couldn’t eat, and something was wrong.  It turned out that she needed to cut dairy out of her diet, which helped with her acid reflux, but it didn't solve the emotional side of things and her stress.  Havilah explains that serotonin, melatonin, and all of these hormones are produced in your gut, not your brain.  So, it isn’t emotional eating, there’s a physiological response to food that happens in your gut that makes you feel happy.Havilah is a stress starver (not eater), which is a problem just as much as stress eating.  Just after getting her son’s acid-reflux under control, her daughter began to struggle with brain tumors.  She has since gotten them under control, but the struggle that she endured mentally has taught her more about herself than anything else.  All of these things got her into personal development.  She started out being a cooking coach during the first break she got from her family stresses.  This came from a place of wanting to help people understand the basic principle of how to cook and how to connect to food in a different way.  Eventually, though, she needed to find a way to “function forward” when her daughter went through a second bout of brain tumors.  The second round brought clarity to what was good, right, or indifferent in her life and in her family’s life.  On top of all of this, she was dealing with her father’s liver failure and a catastrophic achilles injury that kept her from being able to walk.  This got her into a dark place.  It was then that she realized that she needed to get into a healthier headspace herself.  So, she had to get back into self-improvement.  This caused her to get into a more whole-self approach.  The goal with her and her coaching wasn’t just to work on the outside parts of people, but to work on the inside parts.  She thinks about it as having to get through a concrete wall to be able to get to those inside parts.Havilah is a person who gets stuff done, but there’s a cost to that “get it done” ability, and that’s an emotional disconnect with herself.  This then causes a disconnect to her own spirituality, which got her into a very dark place.  She had to hire a mindset and vision coach to get her out of that dark, sticky place.  Havilah can’t do it all and doesn’t have it all figured out.  It was hard for her to figure out that she didn’t have to do everything by herself.  You always have a choice about how you respond to the things that life throws your way.Havilah’s Hot Takes: have a morning routine and a nighttime routine that best serves you. The nighttime routine should set you up for success the next day. If you want to lose weight, sleep well.  You can sleep yourself slim. Journal.  It’s a “hamster wheel exit.” Calm the chaos in your brain if you want to be productive Plan your meals Find local sources for food if you can and if you can afford to Get to know your farmers and know where your food comes from Standardize meals How to get in touch with Havilah:Email - thatcookingcoach@gmail.comFB - HAVe Strategy Coaching

Episode 76 - Havilah Vangroll: You Can't Do It All

This week, Samantha talks with empowerment coach, Kristin Zucaro about how to have difficult conversations.  As an empowerment coach, she helps people breathe through people pleasing and perfectionism, setting and honoring boundaries, and finding their life’s purpose.Kristin became a coach because of a wakeup call she received back in 2019.  She was a total people-pleaser her entire life and through college.  In 2012, she received a diagnosis of thyroid cancer.  She beat it and got right back onto the corporate horse.  Then, she received a diagnosis of melanoma, a non-life threatening form of cancer in her case.  This time, though, she took it as a gift.  This time, she wouldn’t be returning to the corporate world and pursued her career in coaching.Difficult conversations aren’t an “if” but a “when” they happen.  Kristin’s coping mechanism used to be to avoid the conversation completely.  She wasn’t taught and didn’t know how to have difficult conversations when she was growing up, so her goal now is to give people the tools, support, guidance, and the listening ear to prepare for them.Her tumultuous childhood didn’t give her the tools to go deeper because she wasn’t allowed to talk about the things that were happening in the house.  She details the events of her youth that caused her own trauma and caused her difficulty in having difficult conversations.  She also loosely attributes her thyroid cancer on her suppression of the truth growing up and not talking about the things actually going on in the home.Kristin has formula for having difficult conversations. For example, Kristin’s intention with the podcast interview was to “be assertive.”  This is how she decided she would show up.  If you know that you have to approach a difficult situation or conversation, if you can commit to being intentional, you can try to stick to it.  Then, after you have your intention, you can contemplate where the other person is.  You can make an attempt to put yourself in their shoes.  This is empathic, but also allows you to anticipate difficulties in the conversation before they happen.  Finally, she says to use “I” statements instead of “you” statements.  This allows you to find common ground with the other person.  “I noticed that” or “I observed” are statements that you can use to disarm the other person and have a difficult, but productive, conversation.  If you get to the point where you start to get into “you” statements, it’s time to take a pause and pick up the conversation later.During their conversation, Kristin and Samantha agree that "all we can do is work on ourselves and be the best person that we can be and set healthy boundaries."  As parents, Kristin says, it is so important to work out our own stuff so that we can be our best selves for our kids.  She realized that the best example she can set for her kids is to model difficult conversations with her husband in front of the kids.  Over time, it will teach them how to have disagreements in a healthy way.If you want to get in touch with Kristin Zucharo, you can find her and her podcast at:Instagram: @kristinzucaroWeb: kristinzucaro.comPodcast: on Spotify and on her website - “Curiosity, Courage, and Truth”https://www.kristinzucaro.com/podcast

Episode 75 - Kristin Zucaro: Difficult Conversations

This week, Samantha gets to be a “nerd by proxy” with Dr. Erika Michalski, EDD.  Erika is a clinician and self-proclaimed nerd, and founder of "Strategically Authentic."  Samantha talks with her about the science behind authenticity and satisfaction.  Erika also runs the instagram site @consultantbarbie, where she wants to encourage people to be a catalyst for their own evolution and then how to coach the people around them.  "Evolution" is her preferred term because it’s all about what you keep as you move forward and what you change, whether by choice or not.  For Erika, authenticity is understanding who you are in the middle of the chaos and knowing how to stay in alignment with who you are.  But, don’t blindly follow one track and never pay any attention to anything else.  You don’t want to miss any opportunities to evolve!  If you only read things that you agree with, you can’t evolve.  We can’t make informed decisions if we are only selecting information we agree with or align with to be in our space.  Erika loves to celebrate, too!  Celebration is validation and they work in tandem.  Existing in the moment of the accomplishment is how she defines celebration.  When people have different levels of celebration, it needs to match the magnitude of the accomplishment and it needs to honor the contributor, not the celebrator.To close, Erika goes into the neuroscience of satisfaction. The crux of all of it is you have 4 neurological channels that contribute to your satisfaction, and they all work independently of each other.  #1 - Maintenance of Positivity: When we have positive emotions, how do we maintain them?  What do you choose to do to maintain positivity?  How do we invite positive energy to move forward to the next project?#2- Recovery from Negative Emotions: How do we recover from negative emotions?  Negative emotions are going to happen, so how do we move on and release them?  That is a very different concept.  To quote Ted Lasso - “be a goldfish.”  This means we need to let go of the things that we know we don’t want to repeat.  #3- Tune Out the Noise: This may be the hardest one.  It’s about your ability to focus.  It is inviting your brain to stop.  For some people, it’s meditation.  For others, it’s the end of a yoga session.#4- Doing Acts of Service for Others Without Expecting Recognition: This is the idea that when you’re above ground, you get to make another person’s life better.  When you post about something great that you’ve done, you’re already getting that neurological reward.  Then, you don’t get the long-term satisfaction, which has a different depth.  You cannot seek satisfaction from external sources.  It won’t work.  What you can get from external sources is pleasure, but pleasure ends at the completion of that act.Erik ends the podcast with a thought that we hope every Flusher can get behind.  She says that "everybody should get a license and a therapist when they turn 16."You can find Erik Michalski on Instagram at:@consultantbarbie

Episode 74 - Erika Michalski: The Science of Satisfaction

This week, Samantha talks with the owner of Conquer The Chaos Organizing, Kerry Thomas.  Kerry understands that organization is so much more than what people realize, which is why she is so passionate about helping entrepreneurs with organization.  She believes that "the more organized you are, the less time you waste."So many entrepreneurs have undiagnosed ADHD.  Our world is almost set up to bring out those traits from people.  There’s no time for resting in the entrepreneurial world.  This is why she is passionate about helping entrepreneurs, because she understands the pitfalls of entrepreneurship and how the world can work against entrepreneurs.Kerry says that your level of organization is going to ebb and flow throughout your life.  You have to be able to give yourself grace to allow yourself to function sometimes.  It doesn’t have to be perfect.  Pinterest, for example, is great because of the inspiration you can find from it, but your house doesn’t have to look like Pinterest.  Sometimes “perfect” is stressful and sometimes it is peaceful.  It depends on the person.  Kerry doesn’t care if your hangers match.  She has been drawn to people who feel overwhelmed and helps them to get their head above water.  She wants people to be comfortable in a way that works for them, not what appears to work for other people.The feeling of being a failure feeds into your emotional clutter.  Kerry wants to simply reverse this flow.  Then, once you start to declutter, you actually start wanting to organize.   Anybody that has done self-work knows that once you start to work on yourself, you make space for more things to come in and you find that you have more energy.  Part of the good energy is simply re-taking your space.  On another level, though, everything is made up of energy, including our clutter, and this can de-energize us.  Kerry offers three areas to look at, in general, for organization: home organization, office organization, and internal organizationHome - Have routines, designated spots ("everything needs a home"), and talk with the people you live with to figure out what works for everybody in the home.  For Kerry, the kitchen counter was designated as a “no clutter zone” in her house.  Start by speaking up and not holding resentment inside.Office - Look at the information flow.  The information that comes in; where does it come in, where does it go, and how does it get to the next place it needs to go?  Figure out where the blockages are.  Internal - Kerry helps people develop a toolkit (journaling, meditation, movement, vision boards, etc) for internal organization.  In general, though, her tip is to “make the decision.”  Change is the result of action, and action is the result of decision.  She understands that sometimes it may take people years to make decisions.What happens when you don’t make your decisions?  You get overwhelmed.  You get stuck.  You don’t have to stay there long, though.  One of Kerry's favorite sayings is "what get’s scheduled gets done."  Another one is also, "do what works for you."You can find Kerry Thomas at:ctcorganizing.com(Her TED Talk is on the front page)The best way to connect with Kerry is through her Facebook Group - "Less Clutter More Peace"

Episode 73 - Kerry Thomas: Organizing Ourselves

This week, Samantha talks with wellness and success mentor and owner of Wise Oils Wellness, Athena Scalise Waitt.  Athena previously worked for NATO and worked for a non-profit called “Reef Relief.”  She was working in organization and managing people, but also the aspect of working for the greater good.  Growing up, she wanted to be a lawyer for women’s rights, and has always been an advocate for the environment.  Looking back, she didn’t know it at the time, but these things were manifested.  At a young age, she was connected to her value system.Now, Athena is still working now in a way that continues to lean into her passions.  As a part of this, Samantha and Athena explore the concept of the “mental vision board” as a guiding light.  Athena has a strong faith, which is a part of her own mental vision board.  The faith value is a big part of the “value pie” for her.  It was her children that got her back into the faith.  She didn’t want to force feed her children something just because that’s what she knew, so she went to a bible study to figure out what she believed herself.  She had a stroke in 2005 and breast cancer in 2007, and her faith gave her a completely different perspective on these things and also allowed her to witness to her faith with others.Athena says that no matter what you believe, you are not meant to live life alone.  Our biggest hurdle in life is comparison, which is the "thief of joy."  For five years, she struggled with fatigue due to recovery from surgeries, but she couldn’t say that her neighbor was doing better than her.  Still, it affected the way she was able to be a parent to her children, but she had to be kind to herself and have compassion for herself.We have to find ways to ground ourselves and get back to our “true compass,” which is the value system that guides us.She’s been on a wellness journey since she was 12 when her mom introduced her to the idea that she was responsible for her own decisions.  So, she’s been on the path of making informed decisions for a long time.  Most people don’t realize that they need to invest time to actually make informed choices.  So, when the pandemic hit, she was well equipped to help people get solutions into their hands right away.  Fear was a driving factor for people over the past year, and it can manifest physically in our bodies in many different ways.  She likes to get people in touch with their emotions, because there’s a direct connection to emotions and the body.  Getting back into touch with their bodies and get back to a sense of balance is what Athena wants most for her clients.She believes that we have to be proactively involved in the solution, no matter the problem.  Sometimes people just want an answer to their problems, but she believes you have to be proactive in your own healing.  You have to want to heal yourself.  Cancer is a part of her own story, but it isn’t who she is.  It has been 14 years since she got her diagnosis.  But, she doesn’t want to consider herself a “survivor” on a daily basis, she considers herself a "thriver."  It’s these root emotions that we need to get to the bottom of.  Then we start to unfold the ways to do the work ourselves.  There’s no judgment for people that can’t get to that point, because everybody is different and on their own path and we’ve all spent time there, but that's the goal.Whatever she’s doing, as long as she’s living into her core values of integrity and authenticity, she knows that she is enough.  Young mothers often have so much self-doubt and self-criticism that is steals the joy of their experiences.  She hopes that the next generation is able to break apart from the norms that shaped the previous generation of women to be a certain way.  It wasn’t just norms dictated by men, but also women who were taught a certain way and feel like the next generation should be the same.“It’s never too late to start being yourself.”Athena believes that we are evolving as a society, and her daughters are evolving as women, too, which excites her for their future.  Her children area always schooling her, also. This is great because she also understands that we need to be humble enough to understand that our children can teach us things.  Athena Scalise Waitt can be found in the following locations:wiseoilswellness.comFB:Wise Oils WellnessInstagram:@wiseoilsEmail:mywiseoils@gmail.com

Episode 72 - Athena Scalise Waitt: Find Your True Compass

This week, Samantha talks with business owner and mother of 3, Julie Nicholson Burke.  Motherhood was much more difficult for Julie than she ever imagined it to be.  Her oldest son has been challenging to raise, and then she also has twins.  So, when it came to running a business, she had to have patience.  This wasn’t being carried over to her kids, though.  She didn’t have patience for them the way she did for her business.  Her daughter reminded her that “we’re just small,” which was a harsh reminder that she needed to rethink how she treated her kids.There are parallels to parenting and consequences that Julie has been able to draw.  What was innate in her to parent her kids didn’t work.  She had to find different ways and different avenues to parents her children.  She had to press to get her son tested because she knew in her gut that something wasn’t right.  He was having difficulty in school socially and in most other situations.  Overall, it’s all been a long journey.  What did life look like before making the personal connections in her business?  Life before was chaotic.  She didn’t like being a mom.  It felt like no matter what she did, it didn’t work.  She thought that there was joy that came with being a mom, but there was just a lot of yelling and misunderstanding.  The shift started in roughly year 2 of her business when she was attending lots of training sessions.  She kept hearing the same message over and over again.  Direct sales is simple, but not easy, so you have to have patience.  So, after understanding this message, she realized it could be applied to her kids, too, with having patience with them.  Consistency with her business but not with her kids was a place where a big switch needed to happen.  She had to put up certain boundaries with her kids.  Through quarantine, the four of them would play a “catch me” game, but after a while, she was exhausted.  When she said that she needed a break, to her surprise, they were happy to go play by themselves in their rooms.  This boundary was well received and still gave the kids what they needed. With the addiction to technology that we all have today, as long as we can take some time to give our kids our undivided attention, even just a little bit of time, it goes a long way with connecting authentically with them.  She had her kids through IVF, so there’s a huge investment they’ve already put into their kids.  This made her seriously wonder why she was so miserable after becoming a mom.  She felt like she was being ungrateful.  She didn’t know there would be so much anxiety associated with parenthood, especially with twins.  For a long time, she could talk to her good friends and her family about how much she wasn’t enjoying being a mom.  She was a really great aunt, so it made sense that she would be a great mom, but it just wasn’t the same.The shift started by not caring what other moms thought.  In her business, she has to not care what the “haters” thought, but as a mom, it was hard for her to not care what other moms thought.  She has a very difficult son where she has had to just say, “we’re done!” and that's difficult for her because she’s the type of person that wants everybody to like her.  However, she had to parent her son very differently from other people, so it was really difficult.It took a lot of time and trial and error; of seeing the looks from other moms to learn how to not care.  No kid comes with a manual.  They’re all different.  Nothing works for one that works exactly the same way for another.  She believes that there should be a high level of compassion for children, but also for parents of children.  Nobody wants their child to be the ‘biter’ or the ‘hitter,’ nor do they want their children to be the one who gets bit or hit.  There has to be compassion for the child and the parents in any situation because there needs to be an understanding that the child is just learning and the parent is doing their best and that there’s no right or wrong way to raise a child because each one is different.The lessons you can learn in business can be applied to personal life and vice versa.  Everybody is always looking for the “secret sauce” for their business, but it always comes back to you being your own secret sauce.  Customers come back to you because you are the “secret sauce.”  As a mom, she needs to be the “secret sauce” for her children, too.  She doesn’t want her children to look back at their childhood and think, “mom yelled a lot.”  You can find Julie Nicholson Burke on:Facebook - search for:  Julie Nicholson BurkeJ. Burke for J. Elizabeth

Episode 71 - Julie Nicholson Burke: You Are The Secret Sauce

This week, Samantha talks with founder of DC Fempreneur (DC Fem), Lisa Shapiro about what DC Fem means to her and how it has helped her not just professionally, but personally as well. Lisa set out on her entrepreneurial journey when she gave up her regular corporate job to pursue something that she felt a need for. She created a space where entrepreneurial women could form a community to help each other grow and to support one another. So, listen in as Lisa and Samantha Flush It Out!

Episode 70 - Lisa Shapiro: Building Community

This week, Samantha talks with social media guru Karlyn Ankrom about being a dance instructor, the nuances of impostor syndrome, and the benefits and pitfalls of today's social media scene. Karlyn gives a couple of tips on how to navigate social media with the youngest generation, so listen in as Samantha and Karlyn "Flush It Out!"

Episode 69 - Karlyn Ankrom: Lean Into Your Expertise

Flushing It Out with Samantha Spittle, the Introvert's Extrovert. The podcast where she talks to people so you don't have to...for now.

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Flushing It Out

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