NOTE: This episode contains some adult discussion which includes topics of sexual assault and abuse.Have you ever wondered about the secret and sometimes dark world of a human's "special" desires? Dr. Wendy asks Kinsey Institute's Dr. Justin Lehmiller if scientists have discovered an evolutionary basis for our fantasy worlds and fetishes. Oh, yeah, and a whole lot more!Lehmiller is a social psychologist and the author of "Tell Me What You Want: The Science of Sexual Desire and How It Can Help You Improve Your Sex Life." His writing can also be found at sexandpsychology.comContact Dr. Wendy and Mating Matters at matingmatters@iheartmedia.com or (323) 207-8277.If you feel like you need to talk to someone about sexual assault or abuse, call the RAINN Abuse Hotline: 800-656-HOPE (4673)

Mating Matters

Fantasies and Fetishes

Dr. Wendy is hard at work on an episode called Fantasies and Fetishes where she talks to sex researcher Justin Lehmiller from the world famous Kinsey Institute. That episode is coming soon, but in the meantime there was a lot more they talked about that was too good to hoard, like his research on "friends with benefits" and the US' super lackluster sex education policy. No wonder porn is so popular, he says! Dr. Wendy also adds some other studies to the mix.But really, what Dr. Wendy wants is for you to call our Mating Matters message line (323-207-8277) or email us a voice memo (matingmatters@iheartmedia.com) to tell her what you fantasize about or have a special "attachment" to -- i.e. fetish. Names are confidential. Talk to us!

Casual Sex, Attachment and Our...Strange...Sex Ed

In this special episode, we catch up with our promiscuous alpha Dr. Wendy spoke to in season one. Our listener first contacted us because he was at a crossroads. At the age of 24 he guessed he'd had about 200 sex partners. But the birth of his little girl really got him thinking about what he truly wants in life and love. We find out if an alpha can really change his ways.Contact us by email or voice memo at matingmatters@iheartmedia.com or leave a message at 323-207-8277. We'd love to hear from you!

An Alpha's Evolution

WARNING: this episode contains discussion and stories regarding genetic sexual attraction, incest and sexual abuse. Genetic Sexual Attraction is a phenomenon. It requires a certain combination of events for it to be triggered in estranged family members, but when it hits it hits HARD. People who have experienced GSA have described at as OVERWHELMING, POWERFUL, ADDICTIVE, and the DEEPEST LOVE.Thank you to our two incredible guests who were so brave and honest when they spoke with us about their personal experience. For more information on genetic sexual attraction, go to https://thegsaforum.com/.RAINN National Sexual Assault Hotline is 1-800-656-HOPE. This nationwide partnership provides victims of sexual assault with free, confidential services around the clock.

Accidental Incest - A Familial Phenomenon

How old were you when you started puberty? Most people will say somewhere between 10-15. There is a smaller percentage of people, though, who will experience those physical and hormonal changes earlier, in some cases MUCH earlier. Ladies, can you imagine starting your period when you were seven years old? Dr. Wendy talks with the endocrinologist who literally wrote the textbook on precocious puberty and a few people who have experienced this rare condition personally or as a parent. Questions? Thoughts? Call the Mating Matters message line at (323) 207-8277 or send a voice memo to matingmatters@iheartmedia.com.

Precocious Puberty

[EPISODE NOTE: Question two is regarding pedophilia.] Dr. Wendy answers questions from our listeners while we've all been on some level of lockdown. Thanks to all of our dedicated listeners who have called our message line at (323) 207-8277 or emailed us voice memos at matingmatters@iheartmedia.com. Keep them coming!

Mating Messages: Questions From Quarantine

This episode is an oldie but a bestie. As a special treat to fluff it up, though, Dr. Wendy talks to former hockey player Brooks Laich about, well, his testosterone. He is surprisingly open about how being a professional athlete could affect falling in love. Plus the show: how this powerful little hormone affects so much of a man's behavior and personality. Women, did you know you can increase his testosterone level any time you want?

The Trouble With Testosterone 2.0 - With Brooks Laich

Dr. Wendy Walsh digs deeper into a major surface issue - skin color. Where does racism come from? Did racism evolve in homosapiens or is it something humans develop within their lifespan? She also points out important things to be aware of as you navigate the world or have kids of your own like implicit bias and how dating apps could be reinforcing racism as we search for love. Dr. Wendy also talks about the one group of people least likely to ever marry - not because they don't want to, but because life has gotten particularly complicated for them.Call our Mating Matters Message Line at 323-207-8277 or leave an email or voice memo at matingmatters@iheartmedia.com with any questions, comments or desires for future episodes.

Racy Relations

In this Quarantine Episode of Mating Matters, Dr. Wendy touches on all kinds of tools and tips for people stuck at home with one person or with no person - or too many persons! Let give each other a break right now, and especially ourselves. Adversity does NOT "reveal character" it only reveals the coping strategy a person might have in crazy times, which he or she may come by honestly. She also goes over the three main ways our psychological immune system is trying to help us through this crazy time. Oh, have you been thinking of contacting an old flame? More on that!

Quarantine Edition

Dr. Cindy Meston is a clinical psychologist and professor at the University of Texas at Austin. She is also the director of the Sexual Psychophysiology Laboratory there. She may be best known for her research on the female orgasm, but she says her primary research interest is sexual arousal. You know, without arousal not much else happens.You first heard her in our Mating Matters episode called "Why Women Have Sex." In this conversation Dr. Meston talks about the preparation hypothesis, something called “desynchrony,” why a sexual contract between two people is often successful, and where the heck the pink Viagra is for women. She also tells us the number one sexual complaint in America. Basically, Dr. Cindy Meston talks to us about women’s intelligent bodies.Please be aware there is discussion regarding sexual assault, rape and a woman’s physical protection response...sometimes including involuntary orgasm. The discussions begin around 11:30 and 29:30. Both last about a minute.Call the Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277 with a thought, question or comment.

Women's Intelligent Bodies with Dr. Cindy Meston

Girls with Daddy Issues. Boys with Mommy issues. Dr. Wendy answers a listener's question from our message line! Our relationships with our parents is a key ingredient of how we form attachments as adults. There are a few ways we deal with the abandonment, neglect or smothering we felt as children and no gender is immune.Have a question for Dr. Wendy? Call 323-207-8277Further relevant listening: What Is Love?, Mothers, MILFs & Wives.

Mating Message: Daddy Issues

Turns out homo sapiens are built for peace, calm and equality. That's right. Our most natural state is peaceful. There actually was very little fighting among bands of hunter-gatherers, and only then when they felt there was no other choice, like when the Spaniards or British appeared with their weapons. The happiest couples and the most cooperative kids develop from a sense of autonomy, equality, and play...and they are at peace.Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277 - We are currently looking for grandmothers. Are your grandchildren a part of your weekly life or do they live across the country? How much or little have you been involved in raising or supporting your g-kids?

Quickie: Peace Be Of You

Dr. Wendy loves her research, but sometimes some of the best stuff doesn't fit neatly in to one of our Mating Matters episodes. In this Quickie, she looks at some of the latest findings in evolutionary psychology and anthropology and shares the gems. She talks about mating strategies of women and men, including how men will often use PDF's (public displays of fatherhood) as one way of impressing women and why less sex after having a baby is NOT a sign of trouble. In fact, it's just the opposite. This episode is JAM packed with interesting things learned from modern day hunter-gatherers.Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277.

Quickie: Mating Strategies and Fatherhood

The world has been abuzz with the "shocking" news that England's Prince Harry and wife Meghan Markle are turning in their keys to the kingdom. First, this shouldn't be shocking to anyone. There've been rumblings of discord and discontent for several months. Dr. Wendy is here to explain how this all actually makes perfect evolutionary sense. On one hand they're doing what our hunter-gatherer ancestors did. On the other hand they are also living on the forefront of the evolution of marriage itself. Marriage is no longer about social survival or strict gender roles. A modern marriage is way more than that. Harry and Meghan are living a thoroughly modern marriage.Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277

Royal Hunter Gatherers

BEHIND THE MINDS is a series in Mating Matters that opens up our expert interviews to anyone who is sciencey and nerdy and curious enough to want to hear it all! Want to know more? Here it is. Darryl Gwynne, PhD, was the charming expert you heard in "Pornography Mindf**k." Remember the beetles falling hard for the beer bottles? That's him. He's a professor of biology at the University of Toronto at Mississauga. His research is mainly about sexual selection and trying to understand the evolution of sex differences and behavior. Of course, there's a twist. His primary test subjects are insects, but, hey, we're not so different. No, really... Enjoy!Mating Matters Message line is (323) 207-8277. Feel like connecting? Do it!

BEHIND THE MINDS: Dr. Darryl Gwynne

Host Dr. Wendy Walsh uses science, personal interviews and pop culture to reveal that mating strategy is the secret evolutionary motivation for most every human behavior. We are wired to reproduce. Even when we are not thinking about sex, our ancient programming makes us respond to reproductive cues that impact just about every decision we make. Using evolutionary psychology, Mating Matters examines relationships, sexuality, and how society and culture shape us all. Dr. Wendy Walsh looks at the biological, psychological and sociological underpinnings of love, attachment and gender dynamics. Visit www.DrWendyWalsh.com for more.Please be aware this podcast talks scientifically about topics that include sex, violence and other aspects of the human condition that may be challenging. Adult language is used periodically.Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277

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