This past Wednesday we joined together for the second live Q&A on The Frum Women's Insight Panel! Our topic was "My Child Needs 100% - What About Me?" Our panelists were Jodi Fried, Sara Shaindel Goldwasser, and Chaya Breindy Kenigsberg. Here are some of the questions that our panelists answered: 1) My child struggles with aggression and dysregulation. Sometimes I literally feel like I'm in a battlefield. And after an hour and a half of dealing with a total explosion, and trying to keep him, me, and my other kids safe, I'm totally wiped. Often I end up in tears from sheer despair and feeling so bashed. What advice do you have to stay calm in those moments, without it wiping your energy? How you replenish your resources afterward. How can you bounce back into real life, after episodes like that?! 2) There are certain of my kids whose demands feel like they are sapping allllllllllll my energy. Like one request feels like I'm being bullied. How can I not translate their requests as FULL BLOWN I NEED THIS NOW demands? 3) Hi! I’ve been doing a lot of inner work and still have a long way to go. I know that my kids need me a lot more than I am currently giving of myself to them, but I have a hard time putting my “stuff“ on hold in order to fully give to them. I have this fantasy wish of being able to fix all my stuff and then come back to my family fully (maybe a time machine so they don’t need to wait! :) ) 4) A) I myself have my own feeling of not being heard and supported by my own parents. But I also literally cannot be there all the time for my own kids. What do I do with this guilt/need? Their needs vs my needs. I can't seem to find that guilt-free balance. Should I just be ok that they will also feel like their needs weren't met either, and that's just part of life? B) My Mother had a loving, humble personality, whereas my Dad was a tyrant. Mom never raised her voice nor did she hurt us verbally or physically. To my biggest surprise as a mother of 3, I often follow that father figure. My ongoing attempt to grow as a parent I have been taking parenting courses for decades, yet I still have difficulties parenting after my heart. How do I disconnect myself from that father image, the outbursts, and the negativity? 5) A) How to stay calm, not reactive, in the face of a child who is reactive and triggering your own buttons? B) This might be more of a general question, but do you have any tips for being more laid back and calm? I am in awe of women who are so relaxed and calm even when their house seems to be flying. BH I have worked on myself and my type A personality, trying to fully internalize that only Hashem is in control. I have recently been focusing on Simcha and regularly reviewing Igeres Haramban and definitely feel improvement, BH. I also know that there is so much Bracha and I am definitely not complaining, but would just love to radiate a calm, cool, collected, and happy presence. Any tips and tricks or mantras would be greatly appreciated! :) -- Links to panelists' contact info: Jodi Fried: http://loveadventuremom.com Sara Shaindel Goldwasser: https://awakeninggreatness.co Chaya Breindy Kenigsberg: kenigsbergcb@gmail.com   Download Rena's free “Tune In Journal” and accompanying guided meditation: https://tuneinjournal.com.  For more information about Rena's 1:1 sessions and group programs, check out https://renareiser.com. Join an Embodied Dance session at renareiser.com/dance.

Jewish Intuitive Eating Journeys

116 - Panel "My Child Needs 100%, What About Me?"

This week on the podcast I interviewed Sara Brejt, one of the co-founders of Jewish Women of Wisdom! We discussed: How JWOW! got started Which group in the frum world they are helping to navigate What experiences in their lives led the leaders to start this organization What unique wants and needs this group has Download my free “Tune In Journal” and accompanying guided meditation here.  For more information about my 1:1 sessions and group programs, check out renareiser.com. Join an Embodied Dance session at renareiser.com/dance.

115 - Interview with Sara Brejt of Jewish Women of Wisdom!

Why is it so hard to make changes in our lives, whether with food, relationships, technology, or anything else? Listen to this week's episode where I discuss: - What the missing piece is in the work we do in our lives - Which part of us is imperturbable - Why it's so hard to do the work - The importance of doing the work every day - The distinction between compassion and agreeing with someone - What one question can redirect who is running the show -- Download my free “Tune In Journal” and accompanying guided meditation here.  For more information about my 1:1 sessions and group programs, check out renareiser.com.

114 - Who's running the show?

Yesterday we kicked off the very first live Q&A on The Frum Women's Insight Panel! Our topic was "How to be more accepting of my husband." Our panelists were Chana Eisenstein, Kayla Levin, and Rivka Slatkin. Here are some of the questions that our panelists answered: 1) How can I be accepting of my husband but also want him to change? Can I do both? 2) My husband is an incredible, super-special person. He suffered emotional abuse and neglect as a child and only recently began a journey of diagnosis and treatment for ADHD. He has grown immensely; but the more he grows, the more it becomes clear that certain obstacles - like PTSD and ADHD - will never go away. It is sometimes hard for me to accept that even with therapy (forever?) and medication, he might always be mistrustful, forgetful, a mess, have low self-esteem, hard to find a job, etc. I understand getting through “hard times,” but how do I accept a “hard life” without feeling resentful? 3) My husband suffers from low self-esteem and a very poor self-image. How can I show my husband that I accept him if he doesn’t accept himself? His inner voice is so much louder than me; on top of that, my “love language” is NOT words of affirmation and I find it difficult to communicate this message to him. 4) I am intuitive and creative, and my husband is black and white, and I'm very sensitive to his energy which often shuts me down. The problem is that he also is home a lot. How can I be more accepting in a way that doesn't affect me? 5) I want to be more accepting of my husband but it's hard because I carry the financial burden and all kid-related responsibilities. He is clueless about these things and in his own world. So I get stressed and anxious and wish it could be different. I don't know how to be more accepting. 6) How can I be accepting of my husband's parenting style when it is so different than mine, specifically in the way we speak to the kids. I deeply believe that children's self-esteems need to be built up and validated so I use a gentle parenting approach (ex giving them time and space to think for themselves and solve conflict - even when quarreling with their sibling, validating their feelings, etc). My husband is more stern and uses harsher language to get the kids to listen and respect him (ex uses threats like taking away their toys for the night). In his more authoritarian approach, it’s hard for me to sit back and hear it, because while the short term goal may be reached (ex they do what was told, albeit grumpily), it hurts me to think that it could have been handled much more gently and their self-esteem preserved. My husband is sensitive when I mention our different styles because he believes what he’s doing is for their best and I couldn’t disagree more so it makes for a lot of tension. 7) My question is, how can I know if I have become accepting, or maybe I am simply numb, to something that really bothered me a lot in the past? I used to try to be somewhat controlling in a certain area, and nowadays I just don’t get involved. But I am not sure if that’s because I’ve accepted the situation for what it is, or if I’ve numbed out because it was so distressing. -- Links to panelists' websites: Chana Eisenstein - http://chanaeisenstein.com/ Kayla Levin - https://kaylalevin.com/ Rivka Slatkin: https://themarriagerestorationproject.com/ Download my free “Tune In Journal” and accompanying guided meditation here.  For more information about my 1:1 coaching and group programs, check out renareiser.com.

113 - The Frum Women's Insight Panel #1 - "How to be more accepting of my husband"

I was having a conversation with someone recently about chinuch. In it we discussed the idea that if we connect to our kids through their misbehavior, they'll learn to continue that misbehavior. I think there's some truth here, but there's an important nuance that is missing and can change the whole picture. That nuance is compassion. We can learn this from the way Moshe Rabbeinu responded to Korach. Listen in to this week's episode where I discuss: - Why connecting to your child even through their "negative" behaviors doesn't mean ignoring them - How every behavior is an expression of an unmet need - Yes, even when your child isn't going to bed on time, there's some sort of unmet need - What compassion is truly about - Why compassion isn't counter productive when someone acts against the rules / inappropriately - The ultimate story of compassion in the Torah: the story of Korach, and Moshe Rabbeinu's compassion - The steps of compassion we can learn from Moshe Rabbeinu's response to Korach -- Download my free “Tune In Journal” and accompanying guided meditation here.  For more information about my 1:1 coaching and group programs, check out renareiser.com. Join an Embodied Dance session at renareiser.com/dance. Try your first class for free!

112 - Compassion for Korach?

There are many of us who for years believed we couldn't write. And this has held us back from using writing as a healing tool. Enter Yocheved Rottenberg, founder and creator of Write Your Way Home. Yocheved runs therapeutic writing workshops and has written a book on the same topic. I've personally taken her workshops several times, and each time walk away with greater awarenesses and integration of parts of myself. I've been wanting to share her work with you for a while, and so I invited her onto my podcast this week. Here's what we discuss: - How Write Your Way Home was born - What some differences are between therapeutic writing and traditional therapy - Why you don't have to "like to write" or "be a writer" to do therapeutic writing - How therapeutic writing groups allow you to be in your own private experience and journey while in the containment of a group - The differences between WYWH the workshop and WYWH the book - What you can do when you're feeling combobulated - in 5 minutes Find Yocheved at www.writeyourwayhome.com. Download my free “Tune In Journal” and accompanying guided meditation here.  Join an Embodied Dance session at renareiser.com/dance. Try your first class for free!

111 - Write Your Way Home with Yocheved Rottenberg

In this episode I discuss: - How I feel about the advice of "never go to sleep angry" - In what way the noise of the washing machine impacted my family - What the noise of my washing machine is a metaphor for when we're in conflict with someone else - How my washing machine is different than us humans - That where there's anger there cannot be peace - What is the first step to do when we're in conflict with another person - What creates the resentment we feel towards the other person - Why pausing for the sake of shalom is better than moving forward in discussion - Which part of the conflict is our responsibility Download my free “Tune In Journal” and accompanying guided meditation here.  For more information about my 1:1 coaching and group programs, check out renareiser.com. Join an Embodied Dance session at renareiser.com/dance. Try your first class for free!

110 - Never go to sleep angry - True or False?

In this episode I interview Chana Jenny Weisberg who is the creator of JewishMom.com. Here's what we talk about: - How JewishMom.com was born - How Chana Jenny went from "I can't write" to writing one sentence at a time, and then a paragraph, and then writing entire books - How emunah helped her through her insecurities of putting herself out there - Where her self-esteem of "I can put out things that aren't perfect because I see my self worth" comes from - How she imparts the sense of "we can do hard things" in a positive, healthy way to her kids - How you can move forward when there's something you're passionate about but seems out of reach - What the root is of Chana Jenny's mission of wanting to help moms smile every day - Where she sees her blog going in the next 50 years - What words of encouragement Chana Jenny has for Jewish moms Download my free “Tune In Journal” and accompanying guided meditation here.  For more information about my 1:1 coaching and group programs, check out renareiser.com. Join an Embodied Dance session at renareiser.com/dance. Try your first class for free!

109 - Interview with Chana Jenny Weisberg of JewishMom.com

In this episode I interview Chany Rosengarten who helps women get to a place in their marriage where they feel safe, connected, and happy. She's also an author, having written hundreds of articles, and most recently wrote the self-help book "The Boundary is You". Chany used the skills she outlines in today's episode to turn her own relationship around. She works with the woman who says, "I'm in pain and I want better. If I'm going to be here in this relationship it has to be different, because this isn't working. And I'm willing to work on myself." Here's what we discuss: - How Chany got into this work - Where she knows her clients will be in 6-10 weeks - What some of the changes are that Chany sees in her clients - The steps of Chany's simple method she uses to help her clients - What happened when Chany put her marriage on the backburner and instead chose to take care of herself - Why this applies to all women whether they are married or not Contact Chany at wifehealyourlife@gmail.com. -- Join an Embodied Dance session at renareiser.com/dance. Your first class is free. This week's theme is Self-love, inspired by this episode.

108 - Interview with Chany Rosengarten

Some of us have a tendency that when we feel blah we need something really big that will give us an adrenaline rush to pick us up: things like food, retail therapy, or scrolling through social media. Others of us recognize the need for something that will fill us up with happy hormones: dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, and endorphins. But those can feel gentle and boring, and it can be hard to inspire ourselves to do those things when we're in a state. In this episode I explore: - What it means that our state creates our story - Why we sometimes enjoy certain things in life and other times those same things grate on our nerves - Why shifting our state will make everything around us feel much better - What it means to be "up the ladder" and "down the ladder" - How to sense when we're "down the ladder" - How we can shift our state - What neuroplasticity has to do with this - How shifting our state can help us shift our instincts -- Join an Embodied Dance session at renareiser.com/dance. Your first class is free.

107 - Shift your instincts by shifting your state

In today's episode I speak about: - What to do when things are feeling rote. Boring. You're needing change. - How what you see when you're out can give you insight into what you really need - How one woman found inner peace even though she wanted a larger home - Two questions I leave you with to explore what it is you really need and how to make it happen, using your creativity. Join an Embodied Dance session at renareiser.com/dance. Your first class is free.

106 - Creating change using your creativity

One of our listeners sent in this question: "When you allow yourself to encounter these often repressed emotions stuck in your body...certain topics/memories can really get you down. Almost feeling depressed or out of sorts for a period of time. How do you deal with that? I know it is important to let the emotions work their way through the system in order to get to the other side, but sometimes it is hard to put our positive, cheerful disposition on hold, if even for a limited amount of time, and even if it is in order to make space for more health and joy. Do you know what I'm saying?" In this episode I answer her question with these points: - What happens when we go inside and really listen to an emotion, topic, or memory - Why and how to greet an emotion with an energy of acceptance - How an emotion is similar to a child's temper tantrum - The underlying challenge many of us have when we have a difficult emotion, topic, or memory come up - Who we truly are at our core - How we go about recognizing our true essence - What the role of our Neshama is in all of our life's experience Join an Embodied Dance session at renareiser.com/dance. Your first class is free.

105 - Identifying with our Neshama

Let's talk about ASKING. Asking for the things that we need in life. Usually, when we want something, we think about how we're going to ask for it, and then... We use all kinds of excuses and reasons as to why we can't ask for what we need right now! In this week's episode I explore: - What feelings are behind us not asking for what we need - What happens when we reach our breaking point - How this relates to all our relationships in life, including with our husbands, kids, bosses...and Hashem - What it creates in our relationships when we don't ask for what we need - How people pleasing is actually us not giving our full selves in relationship - How not asking for what we need creates a lack of self-trust - What happens inside when we end up asking for things from a place of aggression - How it enhances our relationships when we ask from a more feminine place -- Join an Embodied Dance session at renareiser.com/dance. Your first class is free.

104 - Ask.

Today on the podcast I interviewed Yael Bertram, who is a dynamic speaker and popular life coach. Her positive, personable, and practical style endear her to all. For more info about her speaking, private coaching sessions, and self esteem zoom groups- contact her through her website - yaelbertram.com. Download my free “Tune In Journal” and accompanying guided meditation here.  For more information about my 1:1 coaching and group programs, check out renareiser.com.

103 - Tea and Tehillim with Yael Bertram

As a growth minded person you know how important it is to repeat, review and practice. But let’s be honest. It gets BORING. We crave newness, freshness, and excitement. Right? In this episode we’ll explore: ⁃ How to bring newness and freshness even when you’re faced with many repetitive, boring daily processes ⁃ How to find balance between repetition and freshness ⁃ What “within our problem lies the solution” means ⁃ How to find newness from within Download my free “Tune In Journal” and accompanying guided meditation here.  For more information about my 1:1 coaching and group programs, check out renareiser.com.

102 - Finding newness in the daily repetition

A podcast for Jewish women looking for encouragement with Intuitive Eating. I interview women who have embraced Intuitive Eating and are ready to share their journey with the world! They talk about the excitement, their fears, and what has changed in their lives as a result of letting go of dieting. For coaching visit www.mindovermunchies.com.

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Jewish Intuitive Eating Journeys

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